A Murderer's Guide to Fake Dating

0.7 anybody would be distracted, really

I curse when I see who it is. I want to dive under a bush and the only thing that's keeping me from doing so is my superego. 

"Hi, Isla," Jack says warmly. He's smiling, and it's scaring the hell out of me. He directs a nod in Roxie's direction. "Roxie." 

My eyes narrow suspiciously. What is he trying to do? "Hello," I return, voice laced with distrust. "Do you need anything?" 

"Not in particular. I just wanted to check in on my two favorite co-workers." 

I am horrified. First, Jack hates me. Second, he hates people who talk a lot—so by default, he also hates Roxie. 

"What the hell—" I start, before stealing a glance at Roxie. It would be unwise to unleash my temper now. "I mean, what a surprise. I didn't know you even liked us!" 

"Of course I do." Jack is an entirely different human being. His doppelgänger has kidnapped Jack's body and the doppelgänger happens to be a kinder person than the real Jack. "Roxie, I always admired your hard work." 

Roxie blushes. I stare hard at Jack, trying to figure out his motive. Jack turns his gaze toward me and smiles even harder. "And Isla." He leans in, lowering his voice in a seductive way. "You've always caught my attention." 

My head jerks up in surprise. I recover fast, giving him a look of pure disgust. "What the hell are you trying to do?" I hiss, and Jack feigns confusion. 

I steal a glance at Roxie, who's watching us with unhidden interest. If this conversation gets any longer, he'll misunderstand. "Roxie," I start. "Why don't you go first? There's something I need to discuss with Jack."

Roxie looks a surprising level of disappointment. Maybe nothing interesting happens in his life, so that's why he's invested in me and Jack's interactions. Still, he trudges ahead. 

When I am sure he is out of earshot, I spin towards Jack. "Excuse me? What the hell was that?" 

Jack watches me with an emotionless expression, before a foreign emotion flickers on his face and he leans forward, lashes lowering. His mouth pulls down into a seductive tilt and I swallow, my heart beating strangely fast. 

"Isla," Jack murmurs. 

He is moving closer. My cheeks are on fire and I back away until I can't, my legs bumping against the bench. I am a trapped and cowering hamster, in the face of a huge scary monster. 

I can't take it anymore. I shove him away and scowl. "What are you doing?" 

Jack examines my face, before shrugging. "You always look like you hate me." 

I don't refute anything, giving him a flat stare. "I was trying to see how you would react," Jack finally admits. "My family won't believe we're dating, if you always look like you despise me." 

"I can act, you know." I'm annoyed and flustered, avoiding Jack's gaze. "During the wedding, I'll act as though I tolerate you." 

"I don't know," muses Jack. "You need to seem like you're infatuated with me." 

Jack is toying with me once more. I can see it in that little smirk playing across his mouth, the amusement displayed in his whiskey-brown eyes. 

I feel like I'm losing an unspoken game if I agree with Jack, so I fire back a response. "Well, I don't have to," I say. "We could be in a relationship where we both hate each other." 

When he gives me a dubious look, I shrug. "There are people who hate each other and are in relationships, you know." 

"True," Jack concedes. I smile triumphantly. One point for Isla, even if I'm being impossibly childish. However, I can always count on Jack for being a competitive bastard.