Blood of my Brother

Dad Inside

One more chapter left 😈 (unless I split it in half, because it's shaping up to be a whopper of a chapter)
If the formatting is weird, or if parts of this repeat, please let me know. It was fighting me while I tried to post it.

------------------------------

There were few times in Hector's life when he could remember being so completely full, his emotions swelling inside him like a tsunami, clashing inside his chest like the ring of swords and the shout of armies, while he stood silently amidst the chaos in painful contentment. Discord warred with euphoria, leaving him in sudden peace and the knowledge that perhaps he should be reacting more intensely. The day he had been found by Edmund and brought to the castle was such a day. The day he was selected by Talya, her crooked smile filling him with warmth and the feeling that he finally belonged somewhere. The day he took his oath.

Now, as he tucked a sleeping Varian into bed, nudging his mouth shut and depositing the rat beside him, his lungs twisted themselves into knots and pressed against his ribs. Realistically, he knew Varian hadn't been aware of what he was saying. The kid had been seconds from sleep. He didn't think of Hector as his dad; rather, in his exhausted state, he had heard Hector's words and imagined them coming from the person whose approval he desired the most.

That didn't absolve him of the rampaging emotions of protectiveness, terror, parental instincts. Had he not been thinking of Varian all this time as his kid?

Noiselessly closing the door behind him, he groaned at the sight of Adira waiting for him on the couch. A knowing smirk played across her face. "Not a word," he hissed.

She held up her hands placatingly as he sat beside her. Then, dramatically, she gasped, "Is that a gray hair?"

"I said shut it," he snapped. "And you're one to talk!"

"This is natural," she shot back playfully. "Look at you, you're already getting wrinkles!"

"Keep it down! He's sleeping." He rubbed his hands over his face. "You know he didn't mean it."

"You did," she responded more quietly. "I've seen the way you act around him. You treat him like he's your son."

"Yeah, well, he's not," he snapped a bit more forcefully than necessary. "We've had this discussion before. I'm not Quirin, and that's who he needs. I'm just doing my best."

"And what exactly do you think a parent is?"

He cut her a vicious glare. "How the devil should I know?" With a sigh, he leaned his head back against the couch.

"I'm sorry," she whispered. "I didn't mean it like that."

"I know. Just... forget it, 'kay?"

She nodded softly, resting a hand on his shoulder for a brief second before withdrawing it. They sat in silence, lost in thought, until Adira offered a gentle reminder that it was very late. Hector nodded and stood. Pausing with his hand on the doorknob, he muttered over his shoulder, "Thanks, I guess. For... for believing in me."

"I always have."

O‴O‴O‴

"You boys packed?" Adira strode into the room, swinging her sword sheath off her back and resting it against the couch. "We've got a lot of ground to cover. Short Hair has a pretty big lead on us right now."

Varian looked up from the paper he scribbled on, seated at a desk in the corner of the room. According to Hector, Talya and Joram weren't much ones for paperwork, so the desk had belonged to Ki'Bera, Quirin's sword-father. "Almost," he answered. "I've just got one more thing to write down before we go. Where have you been all morning?"