new year's, drew starkey ✓

35

new year's —
35. final conversations

      Kira was still looking to see if Leo was coming back.

After his outbrust, Blair excused herself and went after her brother to potentially calm him down and understand what happened. Lucas, to fill the silence that was present after Leo left, decided to turn up the music and fill everyone's drinks, giving Drew two beers so he could give one to Kira. He was still thinking about what Leo said, about her loving him, but that couldn't be, right? It was too soon for both of them, they were still hurting, there was no way that Kira would love him.

He took a deep breath and made his way to Kira, this one was sitting alone close to the fence that allowed to have a view of the ocean.

"I brought you a beer." he said. "Can I sit here with you?"

Kira looked up from her spot on the ground to see Drew extending his arm, a beer on his hand, waiting for her approval to sit beside her. She knew if she accepted it, it was an invitation for them to talk. She had nothing to lose now.

"Sure." She took the beer and watched Drew sit down beside her.

He licked his lips and took a gulp of his drink. "Are you okay?"

"I guess." She drank. "I wasn't expecting for him to just do that, not here of all places."

Drew sighed. "I didn't know you guys dated."

Kira looked at him. "It wasn't important to me." He looked at her. "It was a casual relationship, I knew it wouldn't work out and he knew too, deep down."

"He seemed pretty wounded about that." 

Kira shook her head, drinking her beer again. "We never talked about it, the why's and the how's. I just broke up with him and remained friends with him. I guess he deserved a conversation after all."

Drew nodded and took a sip of his beer again. Both fell silent for awhile, the words they wanted to say out loud, stuck in their throats, rotting on their mind. Kira was scared, she was scared that Drew wouldn't forgive her. She knew that leaving him like that wasn't a smart move, but in that moment was all that she wanted to do. She wanted to get away from the pressure.

"I'm sorry." Kira was taken aback by Drew's words.

"What? Why for?" She looked at him but he wasn't looking at her, instead he was messing around with the paper around his beer.

"For yesterday, I just wanted you back."

She shook her head. "Don't apologize for that, please."

"No, I need to. It was a lot of pressure, coming to you like that."

"Drew..."

Kira got a little bit closer to him and Drew noticied, their knees touching right now. That sent an eletric shock all over his body. How funny they went from hugging and touching each other all the time from not touching at all. Oh God, how much he missed her touch.

"Kira, I can't do this." He sighed. "This month was awful without you and I really thought that I could move on but I can't. If you're still in mind, in my brain and in my heart, it's because you are important. I can't forgive myself if I let you go, not again. I want to take this second chance again, give it a try and be forever. I know you are scared, but I am too. I'm not used to this, I'm not used to long distance or hell, to even have a relationship but you seem so worth a try. I really need you, okay? I can't let you go, again."

Kira fell silent to those words and looked at him. He was looking right back at her, his eyes searching for any trace of emotion from her, memorizing every little detail. Her freckles on her nose and cheeks, the dimple close to her mouth when she smiled, her eyes a beautiful dark brown but a light one when the sun hit her. He noticied her mouth moving a bit.

"Are you really serious about it? You didn't change your mind?" She said.

Drew turned his body towards her now, letting go of his beer, both knees touching her right now.

"I am, 100%."

Kira sighed and looked to the ocean. Drew didn't like that.

"What's wrong?" He asked.

"It's just,...there's this thing that it's messing with my mind." She looked at him now, to watch his reaction. "That girl...do you have anything with her?"

Drew shook his head. "No, I don't have anything with her. She's just my friend."

Kira looked down and Drew grabbed her pinkie instantly, she smiled a bit.

"Listen, that day...I'm sorry. I should have said something to you but I didn't lie. I was indeed coming from a night shoot, but I was having a..." Drew took a deep breath, he looked up and closed his eyes for a bit. "...I was having a panic attack about...some stuff and Ava, an extra, assistant, whatever, saw me and helped me, she tried to distract myself to go to this bar with her and it really did help. I'm sorry for not saying anything more, but I didn't lie to you and I'm not with her, I promisse you that."

Kira squeezed her pinky with his, assuring him that it was okay. 

"I guess I was so excited to have time to talk to you that when I saw that, I just gave up. My brain just shutted down, I didn't want to get hurt about more stuff..."

"I understand that, I would do the same."

They fell silent again, but this time it was a comfortable one. The things that hurted were slowly washing away like the waves in the ocean, the past soon being forgotten.

"What are you thinking? What do you want?" Drew asked.

Kira grabbed another Drew's finger.

"I still think about you." She smiled a bit, him doing the same.

"And?"

"I guess I like you..." Kira let the suspense hanging in the air.

Drew decided to shoot the question that was burning on his brain. He couldn't stop thinking about it.

"Not love?"

Drew grabbed another finger. She fully smiled now.

"Falling maybe."

"I'm falling maybe too."

Both were smiling now, the unspoken words hanging in the air, everything that they didn't say but didn't need to. Drew decided to grab her hand, intertwining his with hers.

"Are we trying again?"

She nodded.

"It would be foolish of me not too. I'm sorry for being so scared, I want to try again, do this the right way. I learned from my mistakes and if you're here, with me, right now, it's because the universe thought it wasn't over. I'm not letting you go, not again."

Drew smiled and grabbed her face with both of his hands, admiring her, admiring her lips.

"Can I kiss you?"

She nodded, smiling.

"Yes."

"And you're not running away?"

"Never."

Both smiled and met each other's lips. A fire erupting from both of them and the cheers from theirs friends echoing throught the night.

author's note.          omg !!!
guysss they kissed! my babies are together <333
we still have a few chapters left, we still have some things to close in the plot!

can't believe we're almost done, don't want to be away from them <3

thank you for everything, i love you !!!