Not A Temporary Love | Finley & Harlyn #1

Chapter 35

Finley

I turn in a small circle, taking everything in. The bed, now stripped and bare. The desk and dresser, now empty. My suitcases, now packed and leaning against each other by the door, my backpack propped on top. And Harlyn, leaning against the door jam, watching me with a sad smile on his face. He's going to make me cry. Again. I've been crying all morning. But I keep his gaze anyway, soaking him in. Jeans. High tops. A teal crewneck pushed up to his elbows.

"Ready, love?" he asks. I shake my head, feeling that annoying lump swell in my throat. He moves toward me and slides his arms around my shoulders. I hide my face in his neck. I don't want to cry again. Crying sucks. And we need to get going. But that doesn't stop the tears from forcing their way out and onto Harlyn's collar.

"We need to go," I sniff, pulling back and wiping at my eyes. Harlyn lets me go but reaches up with one hand to brush my hair behind my ear. God, I'm going to miss this. I peck him on the lips and then start gathering my bags. We hobble down the stairs and into the kitchen where Amelia is waiting, smiling the same sad smile.

"Oh, Finley, dear," she says, holding her arms out. I give her a tight hug. "I'm not going to say goodbye, because you're going to be back. I just know it." I decide not to protest. I don't have the energy, and I know if I do, I'll just cry.

So instead, I just say, "Ok." She pushes me back. "I'll email you. Let you know what all happens. I'm supposed to hear in July I think."

She nods. "Alright. And email me more than that, hm?"

"I will," I promise.

And then we're leaving, waving to Amelia as we walk down the driveway. Today is the first time I've let myself actually think about today. Harlyn's brought it up a few times in the time we've spent together this week - which has been literally every spare moment - but I brushed it off, much the way Amelia just did. I've wanted to just be. Just be with Max and Elly getting Nando's. Just be in Harlyn's arms in plain glorious view of his parents while we finally finished the last two Harry Potter movies. Just be when his mom talked to me in the kitchen when I went down to get Harlyn tea. Just be when Harlyn played with my hair last night, me laying my head in his lap this time.

And I'm trying to just be today, too, to a point. Just be in my room for what may be the last time. Just be while Amelia hugged me. Just be as we walk back to Harlyn's house to pick up Max and Elly. And I seem to be doing an ok job, drinking in everything - the brick houses, the pubs, the scaffolding covered building on the corner.

"I know you don't want to talk about...today," Harlyn says. He switches my suitcase handle to his other hand. "But...I do."

"I know," I say, squinting at him in the sunlight. "I'm sorry."

"No, you don't need to apologize. I know that...this is how you're processing. I just..." He trails off.

I take his hand, swinging it back and forth slightly. "You can talk about it, sweetheart. I'm just a blubbering mess today, so I'll probably cry." He laughs and stops us on the sidewalk just across from Christ Church.

"I'm just as bad." He pulls in a long breath. "Well, I know we'll say like...see you later and stuff when we actually get to the bus station, but I did want to talk to you just the two of us first, before Max and Elly are with us. And...I don't know. I guess I was just going to tell you how amazing you are. And how much you mean to me. How glad I am that you came to England, to Canterbury. How much I'm going to miss you." His voice breaks a little, and I feel tears start rolling down my face, too.

"Oh, now you've done it. Got us both crying," I chastise, laughing. He lets out a watery giggle, and I use my free hand to wipe a tear off his face.

"So, you know," he hiccups. "Sappy stuff. Of course."