last words of a shooting star

chapter 7

' I saw it from distance, it was in slow motion or so my mind made it seem like that, blood, that red liquid everywhere, his chest had a hole on it and he was choking while trying to talk. And that's where I wondered why? Why does this happen to people at the wrong times? Or maybe was it the right one? I mean chuuya wanted to die, maybe if I didn't stop him he could have died sooner. Why am I not letting him? I mean I sold him in an organazination for information and I put him through danger multiple times but I'm not allowing him to die, not yet. Death is a strong thing, you can undo anything but that. Once someone dies, their body becomes numb and useless, just extra weight, and their soul? What happens to their soul? Does he even have one? I believe he does.

What is this heavy pain on my chest? It's like something is killing me from the inside, destroying my organs and making me miserable. '

"Why are you here mr?" Dazai had his back pressed against chuuya's hospital door, smoking a ciggarete, one of chuuya's new fresh packet he had got this morning "you can't smoke in here, it's a hospital" the nurse lady had blonde really curled hair and tanned skin, she looked at dazai straight in the eyes with a look full of hatred "get off mr nakahara's door" she said and snached his ciggarete "and what if I don't? What are you to him?" she sighed "Mrs kouyou sent me to keep any strangers away of his room" "im not a stranger and she knows it, I'm sure you do too, I'm really popular" she was dead serious, not even a sight of emotion on her facial expression, maybe one, a little bit of anger.

"She doesn't want especially you in here, go away demon prodigy" "oh so you do know me" he said with a chuckle and quickly pinned her on the wall in a dark side of the hospital hallways, with a gun pointed at her neck "if you dont let me in his room and tell me his condition I'm going to kill you right here, right now" her breath was shaking but she was acting confident, she even used her hand and pulled a string of her hair behind her ear that was pierced and had multiple piercings with diamonds on them "why are you so protective over him? Recently I heard that you sold him off to an organazination while fucking him".

Dazai was the dead serious one now while she was smiling softly while trying to hide her fear "and you won't kill me, we are in a hospital, all eyes will be on you and you will never hear anything about your dear partner again" she did a pause "oh wait, ex partner" dazai reached for her pearl necklace and pulled it out her neck, making all the fake pearl marbles fall on the floor making noises, he pointed the gun at her head this time "oh you think you're so smart don't you?" he let go of her and walked with her to chuuya's room like nothing had happened and whispered to her ear "say anything and I will make sure you suffer and have a horrible death" he said and giggled.

"His condition is really bad, he has scars all over his body, blood coughing problems, he might die soon, and his body was damaged and lost much blood with the shot" dazai never thought the ginger would die before him, seeing him laying on a hospital bed was a miserable thing for the bruenette.

2 years before

The bathtub was filled with water, bloody bandages all over the floor while they had loosen on the boy's arm. The carpet infront of the bathtub was wet. You could barely see the bruenette's face, his eyes, nose, mouth and neck were under the water and closed, shut like he was sleeping. You could only see the color of it, pale, like he had seen a ghost, but that ghost was death.

He was waiting for his unpaiful and comfortable death, he wasn't feeling miserable, his mind had finally stopped thinking every second a thousand thoughts, it was empty. His clothes were so wet that were stuck on his scarred and filled with bruises body. Maybe if he died chuuya would lose the desire to end his life, since that was what took his partner away. Or maybe thats how he thinks the ginger would react but the reaction would be completely different.

That day chuuya got shot in the leg, he couldn't walk around properly so he stayed at the port mafia's headquarters. He decided to visit dazai because they hadn't talked since he left the port mafia. I mean chuuya wasn't sad or felt betrayed, he knew dazai was like this from the start, you never know what he plans to do or what's going on in his brain. He was mad and furious though. He was capable of understanding why but why didn't he talked to him? It's not like he owes him an apology now but even a note could have been better than no word at all.

He knocked on the door but nobody responded. He knocked again and after getting annoyed he opened with his extra keys "hey waste of bandages! I know you're in here I can hear the water running!" but as he entered the bathroom he lost his words, dazai was drowing in the bathtub.

'Heaven? Was this the end? The way he dies? It feels so calm and sweet, I don't want to go back. Was it that easy all this time? I can finally die! That's it.'

Suddenly, bare hands took him out of the bathtub and the boy got on top of him, trying to wake him up "you fucker!" he chocked and choked to get all the water out of his lungs but when he finally opened his eyes, tear ran out of them "why can't i just die?" he said in a trembling voice. chuuya held him close "if you die that means the light inside me dies, it might be selfish but I'm not letting that happen" he said and whiped the tears out of his face and ran his hands through dazai's wet hair.

Present

"The light inside him.." he whispered to himself as he threw his ciggarete "Excuse me" "yes?" a normal nurse, finally, that girl from the port mafia was disturbing "could I see the patient please? I didn't have much time before, that nurse kicked me out" he said and pointed at her with his pierced eyes while she was holding some papers ready to give them to someone, then he realised that someone was a female redhead, kouyou.

"Fuck" he said "is something wrong?" "No, I just need to go to the bathroom" he responded quickly and ran to the bathroom but before he could someone was holding him by the collar if his shirt "young man, why running so easily?" "Oh! Kouyou, what a great surprise" "cut the act" she said but dazai pointed a gun at her neck while she was about to cut him with a knife "who do you think will die first?" she didn't answer. Silence. she let go of him.

"Why are you here dazai?" "Why are you? I'm here to see chuuya" she was furious "you're enemies, ex partners, you have no right to come see him." "He might die soon kouyou and me being here is all that you care about? If it's not from suicide it will be from the illness and overwork you the port mafia gave him." "Do you remember who brought him to the mafia in the first place?" he didn't reply.

Everyone started to scream and go to chuuya's room "he woke up!" "Get the doctor!" before anyone could go in, dazai pushed everyone and went close to the ginger, he connected the palm of his hand with the short male's one, as he opened his eyes dazai was captivated by his beauty, ocean blue eyes, weak but still mesmerising. The sunlight fell on him making him even more beautiful "dazai?" he nobbed and chuuya growned in pain.

- kill yourself

before arahabaki continued, when dazai touched him it was over. He was gone. He kept peace in his mind and body. That was dazai osamu.