Amortentia || Sebastian Sallow x Reader

Chapter 26

Looking at Sebastian, I couldn't help but feel a deep sadness within him.

 Even though it had been years since he had killed his uncle, he still carried so much guilt and pain with him. I could tell. 

It was evident in the way he carried himself here in Feldcroft, the way his eyes would sometimes dart away from mine when we spoke. He was haunted by the memory of what he had done, unable to let go of the weight that rested on his shoulders.

I couldn't imagine what it must be like to carry around that kind of burden, to have taken a life of a family member, and to live with the knowledge of that act every day. I knew through this time Sebastian must have been dealing with a lot, even though we had barely spoken through those two years. I could sense it when I would see him in class, all silent, not quite the charismatic troublemaker he used to be.

 I realize that he is more than just his past mistakes.

But I wonder if he realizes that.

He was kind and thoughtful, he had a wicked sense of humor and sharp wit, I wish he could see all of the charming parts of his personality that I loved. 

It was hard to see him struggle with his guilt. I wanted to tell him that it wasn't his fault, that he had done what he had to do in a moment of desperation. But I knew that those words would fall on deaf ears.

So instead, I agreed to his stupid request for me to cast crucio on him. I felt that perhaps if I did that, it would ease some of his guilt. 

I'm not sure how to feel about it. 

We left Feldcroft pretending it never even happened. 

We were flying back to Hogwarts as the weekend was coming to an end. 

As I flew alongside Sebastian on our way to Hogwarts, I couldn't shake the feeling that something was off.

I kept stealing glances at him, trying to gauge his mood, but he seemed lost in his own thoughts. I wondered if he was thinking about his past, about what he had done, and whether he would ever be able to forgive himself.

I wanted to help him, to ease his burden somehow, but I didn't know how. I didn't want to bring up the topic and make things awkward between us, but I also couldn't keep pretending that everything was okay.

So, I decided to take a chance and break the silence. "Sebastian," I said, "are you okay?"

He looked at me, his eyes unreadable. "I'm fine," he said, but there was a hint of hesitation in his voice.

As we flew on in silence, I found myself staring out into the vast expanse of the sky, lost in thought. I wondered if there was anything I could do to help Sebastian, anything that would make a difference.

But the more I thought about it, the more helpless I felt. How could I possibly make things better for him when he always seemed to be pretending he was fine.

The silence between us grew thicker, and I felt like I was suffocating under the weight of my own thoughts. I knew that I had to say something, anything, to break the tension, but I didn't know what to say.

Finally, we landed at Hogwarts, on a lonely corner of the courtyard.

As soon as I stepped off my broom, I felt Sebastian approach me suddenly.

Sebastian wrapped his arms around me, I felt a warmth spread through my body. I hugged him back tightly, feeling his strong arms around me.

He pulled back slightly, his hands still resting on my shoulders, he looked into my eyes. "You know I'm here for you, right?" his words took me by surprise, his voice low and soothing. "Whatever you need, I'll be here for you."

I nodded, feeling short of a million feelings, "I know, Sebastian," I whispered. "And I'm here for you too."

He smiled, his eyes crinkling at the corners. "Good," he said. "Because I need you more than you know."

I felt my heart skip a beat at his words, and I leaned in to kiss him. Our lips met in a gentle yet passionate embrace, and I felt a rush of emotion coursing through my veins.

"I need you..." Sebastian murmured against my lips, sounding breathy and desperate.

I pulled back slightly, looking into his deep brown eyes. His high cheekbones were highlighted by the sunlight, giving his face a glow that made it seem like he was almost too good to be true. "Sebastian..." I whispered.

He smiled, his eyes shining with emotion, "I lov-" 

He stopped himself, but I could have sworn the words were about to slip out of his lips, 'I love you'.

We hugged again, and I buried my face in his chest, "You know," I said, breaking the silence, "I don't think you give yourself enough credit. You've been through so much, and yet you're still kind."

Sebastian sighed, his arms tightening around me. He seemed unconvinced, "I just wish I could undo a lot of things" he said.

I looked up at him, feeling a surge of compassion in my heart. "Sebastian, you can't change the past," I said. "But you can choose how you live in the present. And you're an amazing person, someone who deserves love and happiness."

He leaned down to kiss me again, and I felt all my worries and fears melting away in his arms. 

As our lips met, I heard Sebastian moan softly, not in a sexual way, but in a tired, whiny way. We kissed with fervor. Sebastian's arms wrapped tightly around me, pulling me closer to him, as if it was in any way possible. 

"I'll be good for you" He whispered in my ear, making my heart flutter.

His fingers caressed my cheek as we pulled apart, and I could see the neediness in his sad puppy eyes. 

We both looked into each other's eyes, the passion between us smoldering. "I'm yours completely." Sebastian said, his voice barely above a whisper.

"And I'm yours." I replied, feeling my heart swell with emotion.

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