[GL] I would die again just to hurt you

Chapter 4

She never felt alone on her Land

As they were walking hand in hand

She knew that every day would be this orderly

And this made her forget about eternity

It was only the beginning of the night but it seemed Rorhena wasn't going to take us back to the ballroom. Lenora seemed disappointed but I didn't mind. I just wanted to sit down and think in silence. It felt like I hadn't slept in five days and I could collapse any moment. We were escorted to our rooms and the maids insisted on the fact that Lenora and I couldn't sleep together. I didn't mind sleeping alone but I really had to talk to my best friend so I argued:

"We don't really need two rooms. We can sleep on the same bed, thank you."

However, seeing how terrified the maids were I guessed that Rorhena wasn't going to be happy if they disobeyed her. I didn't care if Rorhena was mad at me. After everything I had told her, it was too late. But I didn't want to drag the maids into this. I was a better person than that.

"Then we will sleep separately, no problem. But may we stay alone for a bit? We have things to talk about. We will sleep later separately."

The maids hesitated a few seconds but after exchanging a few glances they finally agreed and left us alone. Lenora immediately dragged me into the room on the left and she pulled me to the bed, jumping on it in a thud.

"So? What happened?"

I sighed. I didn't even know where to begin. I told Lenora in detail about everything that had been said and she listened to me with shining eyes. Lenora believed in fate with all her heart and was a big romantic so I knew already what she was going to say:

"What if you really were Vindona?"

I shook my head:

"And how could that be possible?

-Admit that it would be cool.

-I can't disagree. Who wouldn't want to be a Goddess? But I am not."

She shook her head so hard that I thought it would fall off:

"If you are not a Goddess then no one is."

I started laughing:

"I don't think that's how it works.

-What if you were a Goddess in your past life and the Crown Princess was the real Rorhena too? Rorhena remembers her past life but you don't and when she saw you she immediately recognized you. Even after death you found each other again. That's the strongest friendship I ever heard about! I won't be jealous, don't worry and will cheer you two on so go ahead and be friends again. Then I'll just have to become friends with the Crown Princess too.

-If we really were the Goddesses then that would mean Rorhena was the one who killed me."

Lenora shrugged as if to say that it was only a detail:

"I am sure it was an accident."

I couldn't help thinking back to Rorhena's scream but did my best to shake that memory away.

"How could killing someone be an accident?

-It would be an accident if I tripped on something and by falling pushed someone down the stairs and they broke their neck during the fall.

-That was oddly specific. Is there something that you are not telling me?"

We laughed and I felt a bit better seeing that Lenora didn't find what happened weird at all. Her nonchalant side was the best tranquilizer I could have asked for and I went back to the second room to get ready for bed. I was so exhausted that I quickly washed up before jumping on the bed. Despite feeling like I could collapse any second, I couldn't fall asleep. So many things happened that my mind couldn't stop working and I opened my eyes frustrated. More things happened in an hour than in my whole life and I had no words to explain what that was.