Between Comfort and Chaos

Lilacs and Rot

 OMINIS POV

The cool crisp smell of autumn had begun to permeate the castle grounds with a slight tinge of rot and sugar mixed together, this always had me alternating between joy and disgust. The sound of the trees shedding their leaves was much like someone mixing dittany in a mortar, soft and pleasant. It was the slow petrification of those leaves once they landed that was the worst of it all. The part I hated most, large piles where the underlayers decomposed with the drippings of run off and rainwater. My overly sensitive nose chose to betray me at the worst possible moment deciding that the rot of vegetation was the preferable scent. It was an acidic sort of odor that would cause a headache if I lingered too long, which luckily was not the plan. Regardless of which smell was more prevalent It was always in moments like these that my body decide to betray me, always. I walked a little faster, wand hand outstretched with the tip gently pulsing as I maneuvered around the various piles of leaves strewn about the breezeway.

All Hallows was a week away and most of school was buzzing with excitement about the upcoming feast. It had been two months since the start of our 6th year and already I was being harassed. Usually, this was one of my favorite times at Hogwarts. Warm cozy fires, excited chatter, and dozens of activities to partake in. This year, however, was soured by the fact that Sebastian Sallow had taken up the mantle to act as my own personal poltergeist. Always appearing and acting as if a rift had never been created and having to be chased off with vague threats. At breakfast, in the corridors, in the common room, and once he even had the gall to follow me into the lavatory, stating that he wasn't following me he just had to use the facilities. He made Peeves seem docile in comparison. It was exhausting! His attempts at contrition were hallow and I simply refused fall back into the familiar pattern of feeding a mongrel who would continue to bite my hand.

The ripple effects of 5th year still echoed like a wound that refused to heal. As soon as we had stepped foot onto the campus grounds Sebastian had hunted me down demanding to know why he was given another roommate, as if he had not betrayed me, cast an unforgivable curse on our friend, nor killed his uncle in the madness that was his pride. He had lost everything due to his own folly, and yet still acted as if in some way he was also the victim. Never once stopping to ask if anyone else felt the fallout. Never once asking me how I was holding up. I had given way to his narcissistic tendencies for far too long. I had told him in the scriptorium and again here that you always have a choice. He chose the dark arts over our friendship. It was that simple... or at least I comforted myself saying that. He was a man now, and I was no longer willing to hold his hand through his self-sabotaging schemes. I had my own problems to worry about. A change in sleeping quarters might in fact help him make new friends instead of constantly chasing after a connection that was no longer there, and I could finally have some peace. Everything was still so raw, and after the horrid summer I had endured, seeing him again was like pulling the edges of that wound farther apart.

His summer had consisted of sporadic visits from our new 5th year friend, while mine was spent in torment at the Gaunt Manor, waiting on an owl full of apologies or invitations that never came. He was showered in attention and kindness whereas I was thrust into the hell hole I had desperately strove to escape. It should have been me spending leisurely time at the seaside and amongst the fields of Feldcroft, not in the cold dark hall were cries of pain could be heard at all hours of the day, constantly on edge, playing the ghost so as not to become a target. Yes, I was bitter, but I wouldn't allow him to see that. I would simply let my silence drown him slowly, as his had done to me. It felt like a fitting punishment, if not a bit immature. Being back at Hogwarts finally allowed me to have autonomy again and I would be damned if I would let him drag me back down into his lunacy. Passing through more cold stone arches I found myself walking to a place no one would ever think to look for me.... The outdoor beast's classroom.