Love, Eternal - A Destiel Fanfic

~Chapter Two - Love is Difficult~

My discovery of this new emotion has made things difficult-awkward-but despite that, I still talk to him and enjoy his presence, but I can't stop thinking about how I might love him. Why do humans have complex feelings and emotions? I had it easy when I didn't feel emotion when I didn't rebel, and when my grace wasn't stolen. I had it easy before I was told to save Dean Winchester. I had it easy before I sided with him and his brother. Now, it was us three against the world and I think I am in love with Dean Winchester.

Dean Winchester, the name that rang through my head. I started to feel awkward around him, so I started avoiding him. Voices poked at me "You love Dean Winchester" they teased. I couldn't make that voice in my head stop because it was true. Why must I love a man who doesn't want that, who sees me as family, as a brother. Why must love be so hard?

"I don't know, Sammy. Cas...he has been ignoring me lately" I heard Dean say as I walked past the Crows Nest. I stopped. "Y'know, Dean. I could talk to him for you" Sam smiled at the older male. "Thank you, Sam," Dean smiled. "I got to go," Dean stated, before walking away. I hid behind the wall thinking. Would I come clean to Sam? Maybe, but that would risk him telling Dean, and that could ruin our friendship. But...I need to tell someone.

"Sam?" I asked, he looked up from his laptop. "Yeah, Cas?" He smiled. "I heard your conversation and I want you to know I am not ignoring him to be rude I..." I started but, trailed off. Was I truly ready to confront my feelings? "Oh," Sam said. "This is serious and I don't know if I am ready to say it," I said nervously biting my lip. "Okay, Cas, you can tell me when you are ready" Sam reassured me. "I need to tell you...I have had these 'strange' feelings lately" I did bunny ears. "Oh, yeah? Like what?" Sam asked, attentively. "I did research and I think I am in love," I said cautiously. "And how does this concern, my brother?" He asked eyebrows knitted together in confusion. I looked around and bent down "I think I am in love with Dean" I whispered. Sam's eyes widened and he got up. "Actually!?" He said eyes filled with shock. "I mean...the way you looked at him, I assumed you did, but wow, Cas" He stated. "Please, don't tell him" I pleaded. "Sam looked at me and nodded. "So, Cas, now what?" He asked. "I don't know..." I looked down. "I just...I just need help, Sam" I said. "Do you want me to be your wingman?" Sam suggested. I just looked at him confused, with my head tilted. He sighed "Not an actual 'wingman'..." Sam said like it was obvious. "I mean, someone who helps you get together with your 'crush'" He said. "Do you think this will cure my illness?" I asked. "It's not a... never mind".

"Now, the issue with Dean is that he likes women..." Sam said, frowning. "But...try and flirt, don't ignore him. Show him how much you appreciate him and love him" Sam gave me advice. "We should practise," He said. "And after you start doing this, we can talk about asking him on a date" He smiled. "A-a date?" I stammered. Were we moving too fast? I have been ignoring him for a while and now I am going to start talking to him again...and flirting!? I mentally screamed at myself to forget this and my small "crush" on him. "Okay..." I reluctantly said. Why is Sam giving me advice?

***

After hours of practising with Sam on my skills in "flirting," we finally called it quits. Sam kept correcting me that entire time and facepalming. What was I doing wrong? Before Sam left I spoke up "Why is love difficult?" I asked. Sam chuckled. "You're right, Cas, it is," Sam said. "But guess what it's worth it, love is important to us humans. Maybe not angels but you can try it out, right?" I looked down. "No, I shouldn't be 'in love' I shouldn't even be 'in love' with a MAN in a vessel like this," I said. Sam sighed and walked over to me. "You're in love with my brother and it's okay...Love is love so, what if it rebels against your father as long as you are happy...or close to it!" He smiled at me. "Really?" I asked. "Yes, love is difficult, it can make you cry but, at the end when someone truly loves you...it's you and them against the world." Sam told me wisely. "Thanks, Sam," I said. "No problem" He pulled me into a hug. "Now, go get him!..preferably tomorrow-" He said. I chuckled and nodded. "Goodnight, Sam," I said. He nodded and walked to his room.

Love is difficult but according to Sam, it will be worth it in the end. I smiled to myself and decided on watching over Dean.

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(A/N): I am thinking about posting a new chapter everyday, what do you think? Also I hope you are enjoying it so far ;]

~Ender <3