Purple Ink (SatoGou)

Chapter 11

I'm heading back into my hometown, but somehow I'm driving myself, the car unfamiliar yet familiar somehow. I drive the roads I remember, that I know like the back of my hand, towards my house, where my mom will be waiting for me. I pull onto the street, pulling up onto the drive, parking beside my mom's car. It must be Christmas break, because around me the first of the winter snow starts to drift from the sky, frosting the ground with a thin layer of white.

Excited to see her again, I rush out, almost forgetting to lock the car, and head for the door. But when I step inside, looking through to the open plan kitchen area, it's not my mom waiting for me. No, standing by the counter, leaning against it with her arms crossed over her chest, is a girl. Her long, straight silky hair brushes her waist as she pushes off the counter, beaming at me, her blue eyes bright and clear.

Before I can react, she wraps her arms around me, pulling me to her, and I don't know how I know, but I know that it's Red. She's changed her mind, and she's here, waiting for me. She finally wants me again. I pull away, holding her shoulders, scanning her face, waiting for the feelings to hit me.

But I feel empty, and her face is crumbling, like she knows that. She starts to cry, the tears flowing down her cheeks, falling heavily onto the floor, her face fully cracked open now. Guilt hits me like a punch to the stomach, and I hate this. I hate that she's crying. I hate that the reunion that I've hoped for for months, the meeting that I've waited for for years and years, is going like this. It can't go like this.

So I take her hands in my face and lean down to kiss her. I taste her tears on my lips as they part for me, and the moment they do, I feel what was missing. Fireworks, explosions in my chest, and a rising feeling of passion, so intense I inhale sharply through my nose, pushing my hands up into her hair, which feels so familiar-

I pull away quickly, eyes opening to see that Red is gone, replaced by Goh, his eyes wide as he stares up at me, his lips still parted, and that was him I was kissing, him that gave me that spark that was missing, that was why-

I jerk awake, eyes flying open, my breathing ragged. For a moment I'm completely lost, but then I take note of the window, the light streaming through, the sounds of the traffic on the street below. I take a few deep breaths, clearing my head, trying to push out the weird dream, but I can't shake the feeling of Goh's lips, even if they were imaginary.

I reach for my phone, tucked somewhere under the covers beside me, and when I open it, horror shifts through me, cold as ice. I have a missed call from Goh.

If someone's bothering you, just call me.

He called me, and I was asleep. Dread and panic sink their teeth in as I fumble to call him back, my hand shaking as I hold the phone up to my ear, feeling sick that I made that offer and then failed him-

"Hey," he says when he picks up.

"Goh? Are you okay? Are you-"

"Yeah. Yeah, I'm fine. I just called to see if you wanted to get coffee."

I blow out a breath, falling back onto the pillow, the panic seeping out. "Oh. I thought- I thought when I saw your missed call that someone was bothering you, and I missed it."

He's silent for a moment. "I'm sorry if I worried you. I didn't think about that."

"It's okay, I'm just glad you're alright." I rub a hand across my head, trying to wake up, and remember the dream suddenly. I swallow hard, my throat going dry. "What time even is it?" I ask, realising I never checked.

"Quarter to eleven," he says. I jerk upright, cursing under my breath, reaching for yesterday's outfit, discarded on the floor. Goh laughs on the other end of the line. "Slept in?"