Purple Ink (SatoGou)

Chapter 15

Hi!!!!

I'm so sorry for my absence I've just been so busy and kind of lost interest in my writing for a little while but I'm determined to at least finish this fic before it disappears completely ;-;

Anyway, this chapter is likely gonna piss some people off. Just know that I'M SORRY and it's just temporary lmao

When we step outside, it's cold, and Goh lets down his hair, shaking it out and flicking the hair tie onto his wrist. I watch him, my throat dry, wondering if he'll let me walk him back. I wonder if he'll let me talk to him openly again. I wish we could address the elephant in the room again, but I don't know how. I hate the slight awkwardness lingering between us.

I open my mouth to speak, but before I can, I see something out of the corner of my eye that makes my head snap towards it. Not something, but someone. My jaw falls open a little as she turns towards me, like she sensed me, and notices me for the first time. Her brows furrow, and she blinks rapidly at me, like I might disappear if she does it enough.

Then she's walking towards us, clutching the strap of her bag, her face lighting up. "Ash? I didn't even know you studied at this university," Lillie chirps. She looks almost the same, except her hair is a little shorter. I suppose we really must have fallen out of touch, because I had no idea she was here either.

"I didn't know you were here either." I notice Goh glancing between us, and my heart sinks as I realise he's going to know who she is the second I say her name. "It's nice to see you."

"You too," she says, then looks at Goh. "Who's your friend?"

"Oh, this is Goh," I say. "Or, you probably know him as Red."

I see Goh's head whip in my direction but I don't look at him. "Oh- But I, um, thought Red was a girl?"

I almost choke. I don't think she could have picked a worse line to say, really. I don't dare look at Goh, because I know he's probably embarrassed, and furious, and I can't blame him. I sigh, shaking my head. "No. Goh, um-" I look at him, and see he's glaring back at me. If looks could kill, I'd be dead right now. "This is Lillie."

His eyes flare open a little at that, and he looks even more furious, but he smiles as he turns to her, his hostility seemingly only reserved for me. "Hi, Lillie. Nice to meet you."

Lillie is still looking between us, no doubt piecing everything together. She's one of the only people that knows I was in love with Red. "You too," she says to Goh. "Well, I should get going. I have a class. Maybe I'll see you around, Ash."

"Sure," I say, waving goodbye to her. I kind of wish she'd stay, just so I don't have to deal with Goh's impending wrath and upset.

"So," he starts, crossing his arms. "That was Lillie."

I think about everything that must be going through his head. I can't imagine how I'd feel if I just met his only serious ex. Intrusive thoughts of my relationship with Lillie fill my head, including scenarios I should not be thinking about right now. I shake those thoughts away, and the bad taste they leave in my mouth. "Yeah. I'm sorry about what she said. I did explain to her at the time that I didn't know if you were-"

"Ash," he cuts me off. I swallow hard, thinking he's about to tell me to fuck off, but he just sighs. "It's okay. I get it." I almost sag with relief. It's more than I deserve, but I'll take it. Goh starts to walk in the direction of the flat, and I fall into step beside him, feeling tense. "I used to be so jealous of her," he says after a moment, and the breath rushes from my lungs.