Atsushi just Atsushi

Cuts?? -1

Atsushi has a problem a very big problem Atsushi has always had a very horrible way of coping with his anxiety he had a horrible habit of always would cut himself in various places it became such a problem that he's had scars all over his body from it and the orphanage, he has been trying not cut for a while went he joined the agency but today he couldn't bear it hee felt the need to feel the burning sensation even if it was a little cut he was so exhausted from working at the agency and all the other things in his life being to much for Atsushi to handle so when Atsushi got home the first thing he did was to head straight into the bathroom and get out his new razors that he bought he took one out and sliced his forearm all over up to his shoulder he bled so much he got blood on his shirt and the floor Atsushi would normally panic that there was blood aound him and the floor but he has a day off tomorrow so it would help for his forearm to heal but the blood on his shirt would be a problem so he needed to get a new one because blood is hard to wash off he learned that the hard way. Atsushi patched himself up and wore a navy blue hoodie with his pants from work it looked okay he just wants to go and get a new shirt for work he put the other shirt in the wash and get's going to the XXX store to get the shirt Atsushi is about to walk out of his apartment until he heard the door unlock and a browned haired man walked in "Hey Atsushi" Atsushi knew his plans were ruined for today "Um Dazai you could have knocked " Dazai just walked over and sat on the couch and said "I need you to come with me " he said looking up at the ceiling Atsushi is sick of always listening to Dazai since he comes to him during non-working hours this messes up Atsushi's free time since he doesn't want to do most things that Dazai gose to do such as going to a bar and just overall helping him with suicide. Atsushi replied "Um Dazai do I have to go I really just want to stay home." Dazai looked at him and said "Stay at home? You look like your gonna go out Atsushi!" He said with a smile "Well I want to go by myself to get some things" Dazai sighed "Well can I come?" Atsushi was hesitant but he knew Dazai wouldn't go any way that easily so they went to the clothes store and Atsushi bought his replacement shirt Dazai was goofing around and made Atsuhsi buy things for him which killed Atsushi's wallet. They headed to the park Atsushi had fun today even though he really wanted to go home and be left alone, Atsushi said his goodbyes to Dazai and headed to his apartment he really was tired but now he can sleep for a long time but he knows he could sleep longer since his body is so used to waking up at 5 am it's hard for him even if he sleeps an hour he will still get up 5 am even on his day off but its around 9 pm so if he sleeps now he can sleep for 8 hours so as soon as Atushi came home he fell asleep immediately after changing when he got to his bed. Atsushi woke up at 5 am he wanted to go to sleep but there is blood every where he needed to clean it up he needs to clean his futon his clothes that he is wearing all his new cuts were bleeding Atsushi was panicking he had had his cuts bleed when he was sleeping but not this much his futon was soaked in blood Atsushi quickly tried to clean his stuff up and wash everything he soaked his futon in some water so he could clean it with some sope he was glad today was the off day he ended up spending his whole morning cleaning up the blood and cleaning his cuts so they won't get infected it was a hell of a day for Atsushi he wasn't sure if he would have a good day at work the next day.

—--Next Day—---

Atsushi headed to the agency after a long night he couldn't sleep due to the pain of his cuts he didn't think that they would open this fast but they did since he spent his day with Dazai going places he was now confident that his cuts woudn't open and he could get to work he was so tired but he was finally able to head to the agency

He entered the agency and greeted everyone he then sat down but he didn't lean on his chair because it hurt and he was afraid that his cut would open again he continued to work till Kunakida stud up and everyone gathered around him, Atsushi forgot that they were planning a party with the port mafia the agency was going to host the party Atsushi got up as well and then they started to discuss what would be happing everyone was ecstatic to throw a party but Kunakida was a bit worried because since the port mafia was going to be there but non the less they started planing everyone wanted to do a party on a boat since it would have been fun and if a fight broke out no civilians would get hurt Atsushi was not sure how he should feel about the party since he doesn't like getting wet but he heard Lucy was going to help give out drinks he thought they could talk with her for a while but Atsushi was even more nervose since didn't know if Akutagawa was going to be there. Atsushi continued to work but was pestered by Dazai occasionally he was almost done he was about to turn in his papers till his shoulder felt wet Atsushi realized that his shoulder is bleeding again! He was scared if someone saw this he would be done for the quickly took out his hoodie he had in his bag and wore it he ran out with his papers that he needed to give to the police station he ran there and then he got a call, he answered "Um, Hello?" the other man said, "Atsushi why did you run out of the building?!" Dazai Tulmuted Atsushi didn't know how to respond he just stayed silent and cut the phone and ran to his apartment he needed a shirt before it bleed through his hoodie Atsushi was confused he thought that it would at least be okay for till work was over he ran and ran all the way to his apartment the shirt that had blood before was clean now so he was going to change into that before someone come's to his apartment to check on him. Atsushi made it to his apartment thankfully no one was there and he was able to get changed and throw his clothes in a basket before he heard baning on the door Atsushi was going to pretend he wasn't home but he heard "KID WE KNOW YOUR IN THERE!" Kunakida Yells "At~Su~Shi~~ Come on out~ "Dazai in the background Atsushi wanted to just slice his throat and died right there right now Atsushi knew he needed to come up with something but he couldn't think of anything he opened the door since he has changed. Atsushi opened the door and looked at them Kunakida was fuming "KID DO YOU KNOW HOW FAR DAZAI DRAGED ME TO SEE YOU!!" Atsushi apologized and let them inside Atsushi led them to the couch and went to make some tea but then Dazai asked "Hey Atsushi where is your bathroom?" Atsushi looked up and told him "First door on the right" Dazai made his way to the bathroom the first think he sees blood all over the sink Dazai was horrified he had so many ideas going through his head he wasn't sure if it was blood from a mission that he was cleaning or ir it was what he was thinking of, Dazai flushed the toilet and ran the sink to make it sound like he used the restroom he came back and sat next to Kunakida telling him what he had seen Kunakida wanted to say something right there and now but Dazai had other ideas, Atsushi brought the tea and they had a light conversation before they left Atsushi went to bed thinking nothing of it little did he know what was about to come the day of the party.

1481 words today >:DD