BLACK OUT DAYS | THE WALKING DEAD

Conquer

Jasper wonders if this is what Rick felt after he ripped Joe's throat out with his own teeth, he still remembers how he had looked right after, like he was hungry for more as he had turned to advance on the man that was violating his son but then after they were all dead, he spared Jasper's life because his adopted son thought by some miracle that he deserved mercy. He never knew Rick Grimes before then so he always had one hell of a first impression and he constantly wondered when Rick had finally decided that Jasper wasn't going to end up betraying them. He cautiously glanced up at him as Glenn quietly retold Rick everything that had happened. Rick was crouched low to the ground, sitting directly in front of him and waited patiently as he took it all in. He didn't seem angry but it was like he understood the choices they had made. At one point, Jasper felt comfortable enough to shift his position against the pillar and wrapped his arms around his legs and placed his chin on top of his knees and tried to ignore the twinges of pain in his hands. The tips of his fingers were beginning to turn cold and he put the blame of it on the chill in the air.

The rest of the group was inside, most of them sleeping but there were still a few that were awake and had heard Glenn busting through the door and were now waiting to hear what they were supposed to do next. After Jasper had beat Nicholas's face in, leaving him with a broken nose, Deanna wanted to lock him up but then Glenn told her that Noah and Aiden were dead and it was Nicholas's fault. Once she had taken in the information, she had turned around and walked back into her house with Reg and Spencer right behind her. She left them all there in the middle of the street and Glenn helped Jasper back to their houses. Tara was unconscious in the infirmary and Eugene refused to leave her side.

"Nate's still out with Aaron and Daryl, I'm sure Deanna won't let either of you leave for a while, keep your heads low and stay out of trouble. I'll speak with her in the morning." He finally said and then he stood back up. Glenn held out a hand to pull Jasper up and they headed inside. He walked up the stairs and closed himself into the bathroom. He knew he could've offered it to Glenn first, he should've but he didn't feel like saying anything at all and it was already difficult to walk past the living room and avoid everyone's concerning stares. Now he knew what Nate felt like.

He walked towards the shower and turned the knob on, he didn't care about the temperature and he almost felt too exhausted to care about his clothes, he had half the mind to leave them on but he reached down and slowly peeled off each article of clothing and then stepped into the tub. He watched as the water stripped away all of the blood and dirt from his body and he began to scrub at the dried parts that still covered his arms, his neck and his face.

His hand was definitely bruised though, his face kept twitching with pain as he combed his shampoo through his hair. He realized that he probably spent more time in the shower than he should've once it started to run cold. He had gotten used to living here, he realized with a start. He turned the knob for the water off and grabbed the towel on the rack to dry himself off. He wiped his good hand over the mirror and stared back at his reflection. His lip twitches and then he blinks once and he takes in a slow, steady breath and then he reaches down to pick his shirt up off the floor and pulled it over his head.

It took everything in him to not put his fist through his reflection in the mirror.

This was his first time outside of the walls since they had arrived at Alexandria, Nate suddenly realized, and once they were far enough away, he glanced back over his shoulder to stare at the gates one last time and then suddenly he felt a large hand rest comfortably on top of his shoulder and he stared up at Daryl.

"It'll still be there when we come back." He told him and Nate let out a sigh.

"I-yeah. I know." He replied, still finding it a bit hard to believe that he had a home to come back to, one with a family that he cared about. Daryl let go of Nate's shoulder and they continued to follow Aaron.