Under Your Skin | Jude Bellingham

018

I proceeded to sulk in my room for the next few days, only emerging when I needed to use the bathroom or wanted to get something to eat or drink. Hayley and Trent tried their best to motivate me to get dressed or leave the house for a few hours, but it never worked. Jobe even came round a couple of times, trying his best to cheer me up. We'd rewatch our favourite movies together and play silly board games, but even though that helped to lift my mood a little, I still couldn't bring myself to join the festivities taking place downstairs. I knew deep down that sulking about Jude and Grace wasn't going to change anything, but I couldn't bring myself to care.

One night, Dad even cracked open the family album and sat with me on my bed as we laughed at old photos from mine and Hayley's childhood and revisited fond memories. He kissed my forehead before taking himself off to bed, telling me that if I wanted to talk about anything, he'd always be there to listen. I knew that he knew something was wrong and he'd always been one to give me my space and allow me to come to him when and if I needed to. I appreciated that a lot — sometimes I wasn't always in the mood to talk things through, but just knowing he was there if I needed him made me feel a whole lot better.

On the third evening of locking myself away in my room, I was scrolling through Netflix looking for something to watch when there was a gentle tap on my door. Moments later, Mum walked through the door carrying a tray with a mug of tea and a few biscuits on a plate. She placed the tray on the table beside my bed and climbed under the covers next to me. "How you doing, Hannah Banana?" She asked me.

I smiled at the nickname before my eyes immediately filled with tears. "Not good, Mum," I answered honestly.

"You feel like telling me what's wrong? Your father and I have been worried sick."

"It's Jude," I barely managed to choke out.

"Oh sweetheart." Mum wrapped an arm around me, pulling me in for a hug. "What's that boy done?"

"He hasn't done anything...at least not deliberately."

Mum frowned slightly and I realised she looked just like my sister when she did that. "What do you mean, honey?"

A few tears began spilling down my cheeks. I quickly sniffled and wiped them away.

"Did you two fall out?" Mum prompted gently.

I nodded my head, deciding it was easier than just telling her the truth. I burst into tears all over again as Mum hugged me tightly, telling me that it was all going to be okay. I wanted to believe her, I really did, but right then it felt as if my whole world had come crashing down around me.

"Do you mind me asking what happened?" Mum said once I'd calmed down again.

"I don't really want to get into all that," I told her.

"That's okay, honey." She gave me a slight smile. "I know you're upset right now, but it's perfectly normal for friends to fall out. It doesn't mean that it's the end of your friendship. If I was you, I'd give it a little bit of time, just until the argument has settled down, and then I'd try talking to Jude about what happened."

I grinned back at her. She didn't understand the extent of the situation, but I appreciated her trying to help. "Okay, I will. Thanks Mum."

"I don't like that girl he's seeing," Mum added. "Apparently she can be very controlling. I reckon that's why she came to spend Christmas with him — she couldn't stand the thought of not knowing what he was up to."

"How'd you know she was controlling?" I asked her.

"Denise was talking about her. Her and Mark don't seem to think much of Grace."