Coming Out Part 2

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by vampire_pete

by vampire_pete

"Patrick, I..."

was the last thing i said when he proposed to me at Chez Trohman.

"I know, maybe it feels fast that we've gotten here but I really did fall for you. I wanna scream I love you at the top of my lungs, but I'm afraid that someone else will hear me."

"Patrick.." so many thoughts were going through my mind. What should I even say? How do I make him undo this, does anyone have a time machine?

"I'm ready. I'm all in." he squeezes my hands.

"You really are?" I had never had this level of commitment, never had anyone so devoted to me. Even if I really can't reciprocate, is it worth it to lose everything with him?
Yes.

"Are you okay?"
I realize I hadn't said anything for a minute or so.

"I need air."

I ran out if Chez Trohman faster than you could say Clandestine. It was too much, all at once.

I keep my fast pace down the street, Patrick not far behind me. I stop at a tree. I slump to the ground and rest my head in my hands.

"A no could have sufficed." I hear Patrick approach

"I'm sorry.." I start

"Running away from a proposal? I mean I've faced rejection, but no one has actually run from me." He chuckled. I looked up to see his smile fade.
I've already ruined the night and hurt him, the truth may help, and I've become tired of running from it.

"Patrick...I'm gay."

A silence followed my words.

He looked less shocked than I imagined.

"You're gay."

"yes. I'm sorry."

"Why are you sorry?"

"Because I didn't tell you. Because I wasted your time. Because I was too weak to admit it to myself." I started to tear up.

"Don't be sorry" He put his arm around me
"You didn't waste my time. I still cherish our memories because you're so wonderful to be around. I should have been more attentive and seen that you didn't have so much interest in certain things." he nudged me and I burst into laughter.

"Just be you. Do what makes you happy. Really." he assured me.

"I will. I want you to be happy too."

He hugged me.

So I guess some things really aren't meant to be, and fighting my feelings ended up not helping me so much as pushing me towards the truth later on.
Patrick and I would take time apart and then reconnect as friends later on. We had thanksgiving, Christmas, and birthdays with our partners and all of our friends.
It seems far less trivial now, and is something that we laugh about now.

Thanks for the memories, Patrick.