He consumes me and I hate it, his words strike my lungs hard. I knew I was deep, but until now I didn't know how deep I was until I faced reality. I am standing in the torrential rain in front of the person who had this kind of power over me, one...
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I hang up the phone and stare at the screen as I put both hands over my mouth. I love you, bye? What a fucking idiot. He must think I'm insane. "How can you say that?"
I get up from the floor and start pacing around the kitchen, feeling like I'm about to panic. "That's going to freak him out for sure. We said it before, but never face to face; I usually looked at a black screen or Dino."
Oh my god. I put my tea mug in the sink and tried to process what happened. I was introduced to his sister, Isabella and Mum. I just saw him in his 'I just woke up' looks. And it didn't disappoint. I'd lie if I said I didn't squeeze my legs together as much as possible. He said he didn't have sex with her. He didn't have sex with Mia! And she's jealous of me! I don't know why, but this makes me feel fucking fantastic. Now I have to figure out what Halloween costume to wear. Should I text him what outfit he has and match? No, that would make us look like a Halloween couple. Not that I would care, but what would his friends say? Felix gave me a few dirty looks. I'm sure he doesn't like me. Probably because he is Mia's friend and knows the history between her and Hero. I take a few breaths of air and exhale and look around. What should I wear to a birthday party?
I won't take Hero seriously with his whole Halloween party thing. Halloween was last week. If they want to dress up as Dracula and zombies, that's their business. Not Mine. Guys just smear some ketchup on their faces, put on some fake teeth and say, 'I'm Dracula! I compel you to suck me.' Yes. Some do say that. I go into the bedroom and open the door to the dresser. I don't even know what to choose for a costume. I take my phone, open the Pinterest app, and look for easy costumes for Halloween. But I end up unsuccessful.
I look at my phone and text Hero. Better to ask than to go dressed as the Nun, and then everyone is just wearing normal stuff.
Hi, I was wondering what you'd wear to your party? Not to match you, of course. But just to have an idea. I don't want to go the extra mile since Halloween was like a week ago.
I press send, and his reply comes back in a few minutes.
Wear something minimal. We won't stay there for a long time. ;)
If you say so, I leave my phone on the bed, go to the kitchen to make myself something to eat, and open my laptop to check some emails I received from the office in Seattle. As much as I like England, I still miss home. I don't know any good quality food stores here. Technically, everything I know about England or London, more precisely, is from movies or what Hero told me. And honestly, I can't live every morning with a sausage roll or a chicken and bacon sandwich from Greggs. No matter how good they are. I go to the fridge and take out eggs, bacon and chives. I put them on the island and took two potatoes from the pantry. I start peeling the potatoes and cut them in half, then make a hole in the middle and break an egg inside the potato with two slices of bacon and cut chives on top and sprinkle a little cheddar cheese and put it in the oven for 30-40 minutes—enough time for me to check my emails and make myself a smoothie.
