IF ONLY. marichat | ✔️

quatre

Chapter Four: Ladybug

Chat Noir stood on Marinette's balcony, side by side, gazing at the stars. He'd hit her with as many cat puns he could think of to put a smile on her face. Which, was starting to work. They'd been doing this for a few weeks now. There were times when he wasn't in the patrolling mood, but the idea of standing up his friend motivated him to leave the house. 

"Chat, have you ever been in love?"

Without fail, his mind goes to Ladybug. "Yes. Ladybug."

"I didn't realize it was that serious."

Chat Noir blocks the painful memories of rejection out, closing his eyes. 

They sit in silence while he swallows his pride, following his last bit of dignity. It was enough that Ladybug thought him nothing more than a joke, but for Marinette to see he was caught up in a dream is pathetic. He hadn't imagined that admitting his feelings aloud would puncture his esteem how it has. 

Marinette rests her hand on his, squeezing comfortingly. "I understand how it feels."

That's right, she does. The black cat is brought back to the conversation he'd eavesdropped; someone hurt her. Curiosity flooded through him. He wants to ask, but he can tell it's fresh. One day, he will. Somehow, he'll do right by the villain in her tale but now wasn't it. She needs closure, not revenge. He can be that.

Moonbeams roll over Marinette's skin in graceful waves. Had she always been this beautiful? This clarity stunned Chat Noir. The way she's shining from the inside out, with bloodshot eyes and damp cheeks, reminds him of his bugaboo. He extends his hand.

"Wanna go somewhere?"

She brushes blue wisps out her eyes. "Okay."

Arms draped around his neck, face buried into his chest, they soar in the night sky going over all of Paris. She squeals out childlike laughter as he hops from roof to roof. He stops when he gets to the one. To most, this was just another roof but to him it was the moment he realized Ladybug couldn't be more than his dream. She crushed his heart, pulling the we make a good team card, the superhero version of being friend zoned. 

Marinette pauses, her mind searching for an answer.

She's probably wondering why we're here. "Before I visited you, I'd come sit here and patrol."

The bluenette nods, understanding, taking a seat. 

He claims a spot beside her, crossing his legs. "You know, I used to have these dreams that Ladybug and I defeated Hawkmoth," Chat chuckles dryly,"she would kiss me, telling me we could be together. We shared our identities, falling more in love with each other, but the-"

"No one can know who you really are, though. Even after Hawkmoth, there are other people who may wish to possess both miraculouses."

"I know," his throat catches,"it's just a stupid dream."

"Sorry. I-uh, you...y-you were saying?"

"Yeah, my dream ended when my kwami, Plagg, woke me up, complaining about camembert."

Marinette giggles, her face reddening. "I'm sorry, I'm so sorry," she covers her mouth, trying to stop the unrelenting dopamine firing up her stimuli.

Chat isn't even upset. He's at a place where he can talk about Ladybug in a past tense and that's progress. In the past, he'd sit with his thoughts in solitude disparaging all of his qualities wondering why he thought the most mystifying hero in Paris wanted this alley cat. Now he knows that he isn't the problem, they just want different things. A choice he is learning to live with everyday.

When her laughing quiets, he asks,"Hey, are you feline hungry?"

He receives an eyeroll, consuming her whole head; Marinette's stomach grumbles.

"Sounds like a yes," Chat Noir glances around the city,"unfortunately everything's closed. If only we knew someone who was the daughter of The Tom & Sabine Boulangerie Patisserie owners..."

"Fine, take me home. I have some macaroons in my room."

"Whatever the princess wants."

"These are," he devours the cookie,"so good."

Marinette chuckles. "Glad you like them."

She's sitting at her desk, scribbling something on a piece of paper. He took a gamble and decided to sit on her bed. She said nothing so he thinks he's in the clear. Her room is littered with pictures of himself, Adrien his controlled life. He remembers her explaining they were purely for inspiration will designing, but why aren't there any other model's hanging? And what's with the hearts?

"Why do you have so many pictures of this guy up?"

"Oh, Adrien," her face falls.

She looks mad. What did Adrien do? What did I do?

"What's wrong?"

"That-well, it reminds me of something that happened a while ago."

He nods, beckoning her to elaborate. 

"I bumped into Adrien and fell because, you know, I'm clumsy and our hands touched for a second and he...he stopped and looked at me."

"Okay? What's wrong with that?"

Marinette sighs. "It's weird, because I've had this massive crush on him all year and he's never showed a minuscule of interest, or seem to see that, so for him to be aware that our hands touching could be something other than friendly was off to me and it made me angry." Her hands are clustered like big balls of fury.

A crush? On Adrien? How had he not noticed?

Wait...

Does that mean he's the reason she's hurting? 

No, no, no. That's crazy. Her hurt and this crush are two unrelated events.

"You think I'm spiraling, don't you?"

"No, m'lady, your concerns are purrfectly reasonable."

She rolls on her chair, getting close enough to Chat to give him a playful punch to his arm. 

Small snores echo through Marinette's bedroom. Chat Noir is laying sound asleep, the blue haired girl in his arms. Neither of them will have any recollection of how they came to be in this position when they awake. Time did somersaults and backflips while they engrossed in one another. 

The sun glimmers, rising from the clouds. Bright heat waves shine into the room, waking the two. Chat Noir stretches his arms, feeling her beside him. He pauses, looking down to see his friend, against his chest, fluttering her eyes open. She lets out a full-body yawn, grabbing at his suit like it's her pillow. The cat watches as the recognition dawns on Marinette; her eyes go wide, she leaps out of bed standing on the other side with her hands in karate form. 

The bluenette drops her hands when the superhero comes into focus. She nervously rubs her arm, staring at her feet. 

Chat sits in an upright position, checking the time on his baton. Six in the morning. Shit. He jumps out of bed, giving Marinette a side hug saying goodbye before racing home. He is so late. Granted he has an absent father and Father's assistant as guardians, so he might have a chance but this was all too close. He can't keep sleeping over like this, it could seriously fuck things up if he wasn't more careful. His secret identity and privileges outside of the house were at stake.

He slinks through his window, detransforming. Not only was he concerned with being caught, but he was also trying to beat the clock to leave the house. He had about thirty minutes to get his life together. Adrien zooms around the room; doing his hygiene, putting on clothes, shoving his homework into his backpack. When he feels a presence in the room with him, he turns seeing Nathalie there.

"Adrien, where were you last night?"