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40| Iyanla fix my life

Toni's POV
July 22
3:15 PM

Today is going to be the first season of us on Iyanla's show. For the two days that I've been here, I've been avoiding Evelyn. I can't stand her ass and I'm mad at Towanda for making us stay in the stay villa. If she wanted to stay with her mother they could've slept in the same hotel room. The episodes are live so it's raw and uncut. I'm a bit scared of that because of what might happen or be said. Especially by me or Tamar because we all know that if Evelyn tries me I will go off and with Tay, she doesn't hold her feelings in for nobody.

We have about a few hours until we have to be at Iyanla's house which isn't far from here. I smelled good being cooked downstairs and my stomach growled. Just as I was about to head downstairs, my phone rang. I picked it up and saw an incoming FaceTime call from Azuree. I smiled as I answered the phone.

"Hi, baby."

"Hi, Mommy. I'm just calling to check up on you because I know that Evelyn is going to be there." I laughed.

"Thank you baby and yes she is here but I'm fine."

"Wait, she's in the same villa as you? And you're there?" She asked in disbelief and I nodded.

"Yeah, I know right. Towanda booked the villa before Tay could do it."

"She probably did that on purpose but just know if Evelyn tries it, you can call me." I laughed and nodded my head. Azuree always has been protective over me when it comes to Evelyn, I love that.

"I will baby. Is Skai back yet?" Skai is off of her punishment early because they start school in a couple of weeks. I let her come back tonight so that she could watch the show with her siblings and Janet.

"No, momma left a while ago to go and get her." We talked on the phone for a few before I hung up to go and eat. I walked into the kitchen and saw Traci and Tamar talking.

"Traci!" I said excitedly and hugged her. I haven't seen Traci since I went to Baltimore when the girls were really young. She hugged me tight and I smiled. Traci came last night but I was knocked out and I didn't see her this morning because she was still sleeping.

"Hi T, oh my gosh, I missed you."

"I missed you too. How's Kevin?"

"He's good. Remember his girlfriend, Oliviah?"

"Yes, what about her?"

"She's pregnant!"

"Really?! Oh my goodness that's so exciting. So you're going to be a grandmother now?"

"Don't remind me." She said and the three of us shared a laugh. Tamar dished out a plate of food for me and I thanked her.

"Girl, I think Evelyn is coming downstairs so take this plate and go."

"Hell no, ain't nobody scared of Evelyn." I sat at the island and ate my food.

"Toni, I know your feet ain't dangling from the chair?"

I laughed, "Yes it is. I'm so short."

"What a shame." Tamar said and I waved her off.

"My feet dangles from the toilet too."

Traci cackled, "That's outrageous." I heard a few footsteps heading our way and I mentally sighed. Tamar looked at me and I looked at her.

"Hey, Toni." I heard Trina say and I waved at her.

"Hi, how was your nap?"

"Good, how are Janet and your kids?"

"They're good, sad that I had to leave."

"Girl yes and she and Janet were all over each other when I came by to get Toni. Just nasty." Tamar said and I laughed. She's only doing that to get under Evelyn's skin and it worked because Evelyn had to excuse herself.

Tamar is so messy.

***

I rode with Tamar and Traci to Iyanla's house which was a smooth ride. We all arrived around the same time and Iyanla greeted us. She had our names on a piece of paper which were in the seats and I'm glad that I'm sitting next to Iyanla and Traci and not Evelyn, but I am across from her. And guess who is next to Traci... Michael. I didn't know he was going to be there and Tamar probably didn't know either because she would've told me. The cameras had started filming once we walked in so let's see how this goes.

"Let's just talk about communication. I have a feeling that you all don't express what you want to say and then get mad when you don't get it. Does that seem correct?"

"Mmhmm."

"Yes."

"Absolutely."

"You walk away not knowing what to expect and then the conversation continues with other people joining in and they are telling you this and someone else is telling you that..."

"I remember when we were all in your bedroom and you announce that you guys were getting a divorce." Towanda said and my sisters collectively nodded.

"I believe that Trina asked 'What's going to happen to us' and you said ask your mother and mommy said to ask you. So there was a lot of back and forth going on when we were younger."

"Yes, I remember that. I would never forget." Trina said while nodding.

"And then Tamar called me, crying, so I told her to stop crying and that they weren't going to get a divorce. I was just trying to calm them down." I said and Iyanla's looked at me.

"Mm, so what about your feelings? How did you feel that day?"

Here we go.

"I didn't care because umm at that time they kicked me out."

"They meaning who? Your parents?"

"Yeah."

"Why?"

"Because I'm with Janet, they didn't like that..."

"Ohh, I see, they're homophobic?"

"Yes."

"So is this the first time in a long time that you've been in the same room with them?"

"Yes, it is."

"I see, and how does that make you feel?"

"Hurt because they're supposed to be my parents, love me no matter what but instead they disown me because I like what I like. I can't change that."

"You could've changed it, you could've broken up with her."

I rolled my eyes at her words, "And see that's the thing, you'll rather see me heartbroken than to see me happy and in love with a woman. You're very selfish, you don't care about how other people feel as long as it's going to benefit you." I said with attitude laced in my voice. I'm not the one to be played with.

"You-"

"Okay, that's enough." Iyanla said and she grabbed my hand. After sitting and talking for a few hours the episode was over. I quickly got up and walked outside. I needed some fresh air. I couldn't be in that room with them any longer and to think I have to do it again in two days.

***

•Toni?

•Evelyn?

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