Stuck In An Elevator || Soukoku || <Incomplete>

Everything worth wanting is always lost.

Chuuya and Dazai sat on a curb behind the Port Mafia Office. Chuuya had a boxed lunch with rice and a piece of cut fish on the side. Chuuya held up the fish with chopsticks. Shoving it into Dazais face. "Looks just like you." Chuuya laughs as he goes to pull the chopsticks away but he was too slow. "WHAT THE FUCK MAN?" Chuuya shouted as Dazai stuffed the entire piece of fish in his mouth. "Did you cook this? It's terribly seasoned." Dazai muttered with his mouth full. "It wasn't made for you to eat, mackerel." Chuuya grunted as he frantically wiped off the chopsticks. "Now my chopsticks are contaminated," Chuuya said, throwing them at Dazai. Dazai swiftly caught them in his palm. "Aw, is Chuuya not a fan of indirect kissing?" Dazai blurted out without thinking. Chuuya flushed a bit, "Not with you." Chuuya said as he shut the clasp of his bento box. Dazai gave him an annoying smirk, Chuuya wanted to slap it off his face. That was just Dazai's normal teasing, how come it made Chuuyas stomach sink? Of course he didn't want to kiss Dazai. He hated him, he never even had thought of Dazai as nothing more than his partner.. Or had he?

Dazai gave Chuuya a pestering look, "You hardly touched your food?" He said as he moved himself closer to Chuuya. "Ya, I'm not hungry anymore. You spoiled my appetite with your spit." Chuuya said, giving Dazai an annoyed look. "Can I eat it?" Dazai grabbed the box out of Chuuyas hands, his lips curling into a smile. "Go ahead." Sighed Chuuya as he started to stand up from the curb but Dazai stopped him by tugging on his coat. "Let go of me jackass, I have work." Chuuya said, attempting to shrug off Dazai. Why was he acting like a child all of a sudden? "I don't care if you leave but it would be nice to have company." Dazais face had a straight expression. He didn't look sad to see Chuuya go, he looked more desperate to make Chuuya stay. "I guess I can stay a few more minutes." Chuuya said annoyingly as he sat back down. Dazai ate his food quietly, glancing at Chuuya every now and then. Chuuya felt a pain in his heart. He hated Dazai, yet ever since yesterday he felt as if he wanted to pour his heart and soul on him again as if nothing ever happened. He needed to speak up, he needed to convince Dazai to open up about the situation or he was going to lose his mind.

"Dazai?" Chuuya said, breaking the silence. Dazai gave Chuuya his eye contact, Chuuya stared back at Dazais big brown eyes, they were almost shining gold in the light. Chuuya cleared his throat. "Why are you acting as if nothing has changed." Chuuya broke eye contact with Dazai and lifted his head towards the blue sky. Dazais expression is still. "I'm assuming you're still blaming me?" Dazai said, his tone cold. Chuuya titled his head downwards. Of course he blamed Dazai, he destroyed his trust."Why wouldn't I?" Chuuya said as he moved farther down the curve and away from Dazai.

Ever since Mori had informed Chuuya that everything He had entrusted Dazai to keep to himself, all his feelings and emotions he had spilled out to him while he was drunk on the phone at night, while he was dealing with a lot of pressure, when Chuuya just needed someone there for him. Dazai had reported everything back to Mori. It was an act of jealousy Chuuya had always thought. Dazai never had a good relationship with the boss and Chuuya figured as soon as the boss finally started admiring his work and requesting Chuuya in meetings more Dazai simply got jealous. But the trauma Chuuya had to deal with was already more than enough for him to handle on his own. He finally felt as if he found his other half. Someone who wouldn't pity his pain but understand but Chuuya was wrong. He was terribly wrong. Ever since that incident all Mori has done is use his own trauma against him. Chuuya already knew that Mori knew a fuck ton about him but Mori would never be able to find the feelings he had towards his past. Dazai was the only one Chuuya had ever been able to trust to that extent, but that trust was broken. Chuuya had been stabbed in the back so many times before but the wounds that were left had never lasted as long as this one. They were never as deep either. This wound cut right through him and desiccated everything in its path.