Since the Day We Met

Ten

HongJoong's POV

As Jennifer and little Harper said their goodbyes and went on their way, I slowly made my way back up to my apartment. Upon entering, my eyes scanned the living room, taking in the remnants of Harper's time spent here. Her blanket, a fond reminder of her presence in my home, lay neatly folded on the couch. Her bag of toys sat near the hall closet—a testament to her playful spirit.

My gaze shifted toward the kite I had bought her, which now hung on the back of the front door. It evoked memories of laughter and joy as it danced in the sky during our picnic day. A few of her favorite rock discoveries from that very day were proudly displayed on the coffee table.As these reminders of Harper engulfed me, I couldn't hold back my tears any longer. My body shook with sobs as I desperately wished they hadn't left. The thought of distance gnawed at me—I craved their presence but was left with an empty space in their absence.If only I had told Jennifer how much she truly meant to me—how deeply embedded my feelings for her were. Was it more than just a casual dating experience? Undoubtedly, yes. There was a profound connection between us, one that surpassed any superficial relationship.The question haunted me: would confessing my love have convinced her to stay? I couldn't help but wonder if revealing these feelings would have changed the course of our lives. Now, all that remained were unanswered questions and a heavy heart yearning for what could have been.

Yes we were together, she was my girlfriend, this was a relationship but I could have made things better if I had just spoken up. FOr now I didn't have time to be sad, I had to get to the dance studio to meet the rest of Ateez for dance rehearsals.

As I wiped away my tears and gathered my strength, I couldn't afford to let my emotions get the best of me—I had work to do. Dance rehearsals with Ateez were an essential part of my life, and for the moment, I needed to focus on my professional commitments.I quickly changed into comfortable clothes suitable for rehearsals and grabbed a bottle of water. As I headed out the door, giving one last look at Harper's things, I tried to bury my feelings of heartache and regret beneath a mask of determination.Arriving at the dance studio, the pulsating beats reverberated through the walls, energizing me before even stepping foot inside. The other members greeted me with enthusiasm, unaware of the turmoil within me. Their cheerful voices served as a temporary distraction from my thoughts about Jennifer and Harper.As we began dancing to the rhythm of our latest number, sweat dripping down our faces, I tried to immerse myself in the music completely. For brief moments, as my body moved in sync with my teammates, I felt alive—my heartache momentarily pushed aside.However, as soon as there was a lull or silence between songs, thoughts of Jennifer crept back. That laughter that could light up any room or her gentle touch offering comfort and warmth in times of need; losing her felt like losing a part of myself. How could I ever live without hearing Harper's innocent giggles again or watching her wide-eyed curiosity as she explored new wonders in this world?Despite the distraction rehearsals provided me with initially, it became increasingly difficult to concentrate on the choreography. My fellow members started noticing the change in my demeanor—concern etching onto their faces."Hey man," Wooyoung approached me during our break. "You okay? You seem off today."I wanted to confide in him—to share this unbearable sadness that weighed heavily upon me. But at the same time, I hesitated to impose my burdens on my friends and teammates. They didn't need to carry the weight of my lost love with them.Instead, I offered a weak smile. "Yeah, just a bit tired. Don't worry."Rehearsals eventually came to an end, but as we dispersed to go our separate ways, the emptiness I had pushed aside returned with a vengeance. Hoping to stifle my loneliness, I decided to treat myself to a cup of coffee from a nearby café. Perhaps the warmth of a good cup of joe would bring some comfort.Sitting by the window, I tried my best to focus on my surroundings—the fragrant aroma of fresh java brewing, the soft chatter blending into background noise, and the rain-splattered street outside. But none of these things could hold my attention for long; Jennifer and Harper still lingered in every corner of my mind—an unsettled storm.I sighed deeply and succumbed to these thoughts—their smiles, their laughter that echoed throughout the rooms of my home. It was as if their very essence was still ingrained in every fiber of my being, refusing to let me forget about them.As I used social media to occupy my mind, it only seemed to remind me more of our time together. There were photos from our dates and outings—each one composing a beautiful symphony that was quickly fading into silence. Even as I tried to escape reality through selfies or scrolling through videos from past performances with Ateez, traces of them remained.My phone buzzed with an incoming message: "Hey Joongie! Don't forget you promised me that we'd hang out tomorrow! Let's meet for lunch! ^^" It was Seonghwa—one of the few people who knew about what I was going to ask her. A smile tugged at the corners of my mouth as I remembered how Seonghwa had become an important part of Jennifer and Harper's lives too. He had always been there with a friendly ear for all three of us.While replying positively, promising not to forget our plans, the thought crossed my mind: what if Seonghwa could help me get Jennifer back? He had seen the connection we shared firsthand and understood the love I held for her. Perhaps he could give some advice on how to win her heart again.The rest of the evening became a blur as I finished my coffee and returned to my apartment. Little by little, I began tidyingup the remnants of Jennifer and Harper—each item a bittersweet reminder of their presence in my life.Sleep proved elusive that night as I tossed and turned, consumed by thoughts of what could have been if I had just confessed my love. Morning arrived, a pale light filtering through the curtains, renewing both my determination to win Jennifer back and the heaviness in my heart.Forcing myself to keep to my routine, I prepared for another day of practice with Ateez. Though the previous day's rehearsal had been challenging, I knew that abandoning my responsibilities was not an option. As I made my way to the dance studio once more, images of Jennifer filled my thoughts—proving both a source of motivation and despair.As we went through our routines, I found it easier to control my emotions this time around. My focus gradually returned to my work, driven by a newfound determination. Every spin, jump, and forceful movement fueled by the desire to win back the woman I loved.Lunchtime came quickly and with it a much-needed break from rehearsals. Gathering with Seonghwa at our chosen meeting spot—a cozy little diner we often frequented—I anxiously awaited his arrival. Questions raced through my mind as I picked up a menu: would he understand how much Jennifer meant to me? More importantly, could he help me win her back?Seonghwa entered the diner moments later—with a warm smile—and joined me at our usual booth.

"Hey! Long time no see!" Seonghwa beamed as we clasped hands in greeting.

I couldn't help but mirror his grin; Seonghwa's sunny disposition was infectious—an comforting contrast to the storm inside me. HIs comment made me laugh we had just seen each other at practice.

Over plates piled with delicious food that was quickly forgotten in light of our conversation, I opened up to Seonghwa about everything that had transpired: Jennifer's departure taking Harper with her, the pain of their absence, and my regret at not expressing my feelings.

As Seonghwa listened intently, taking in every word with a thoughtful gaze, I couldn't help but feel an overwhelming sense of appreciation. His unwavering support and understanding was just what I needed to unburden myself from the painful secrets that I had been holding the past few days.

"Sounds like you need to tell her..." he said.

"It's too later, she's already back in new york city..." I said.

"So, it sounds like you need to take a couple days off and get your ass to new york city...." he said.

"Our album comes out TOMORROW! I can't... it's too important..." I said.

Seonghwa leaned back in his chair and raised an eyebrow, clearly not buying into my excuses. "HongJoong, I get the importance of the album, but it's not like we're going to implode without you for a few days. You need to follow your heart and do what's right for you."

His words weighed heavily on my mind as we continued our meal, long-forgotten food morphing into a blur of flavors as I battled with myself internally. On one hand, work and music were undeniably crucial in my life; on the other, Jennifer and Harper had become irreplaceable parts of me still. Falling silent, I allowed myself to tune out from our conversation.

Observing my struggle, Seonghwa offered an alternative approach. "Look, there's no harm in reaching out to her, right? Maybe a video call or something might help put some things in perspective."

With a deep breath, I nodded my head slowly. Clinging onto that last shred of hope, I agreed to try connecting with Jennifer before making any hasty decisions regarding flying out to New York City.

Later that night, alone in my room, I mustered the courage to dial Jennifer's number. As the familiar yet heart-wrenching strains of her personalized ringtone began playing through the phone speakers, panic seized my chest.

Reining in my fear just enough to stop myself from hanging up, I took another deep breath and let each exhale remind me of what Seonghwa had told me earlier: this was important – no, crucial – for both Jennifer and me.

When her face finally appeared on screen after what felt like an eternity of hesitation, an air of unease settled over us both.