The Nerd and the Whore

Chapter 7

Frank's POV

I don't sleep at all. I have nightmare after nightmare. My worst fears haunting my sleep.

I'm surrounded, not by people, but by darkness. I'm being swallowed by thoughts that had haunted me for years. I can see a light in the distance. It's getting larger as if it was coming towards me. I am scared and alone. As the light gets closer, I can see figures coming into shape. I can't quite make out the faces just yet, but there is a lot of bodies, and they are all coming towards me. The first face I make out is the face of my mother, except she isn't my mother.

She's covered in dirt and clothed in rags. She comes up to me and then abruptly stops. As the other bodies come into view, they formed a circle around me. I'm scared. I want to break through the circle and run away.

I run towards the edge of the circle. Specifically at Ray assuming he'd move. I fail to break through the circle of people. I know I'm going to be stuck here until I wake. I sit in the center of the circle and wait for the worst to come. One by one, my family and everyone I've ever cared about, start taunting me; telling me how much of a failure I am; how horrible I am at everything, and even worse, how shit I am at guitar. When everyone starts to leave, I see another body approaching. This one isn't as clear as the others. All I see is a glowing pair of hazel eyes and I know. I start trembling and fall to the ground. Then, I wake up.

I wake up, sweaty and gross. I immediately check my phone to see the time.

Great, it's 4 in the morning.

I decide not to go back to sleep, due to the fact I have to go to gymnastics today. I'm nervous as hell. Who knows who I'll see there.

I pass the hours on Tumblr waiting for something disgusting to show up. I always show Ray the creepiest stuff I find on Tumblr, and it's quite fun actually.

After spending two hours on Tumblr and not finding anything horrific, I decide to actually get up and do something.

I get dressed in my Misfits band tee and red skinny jeans. I decide to not wear makeup since it's as fuck out.

I pull my converse on and write my mom a note about where I am, since she's lazy and doesn't get up until 10:30 in the morning.

"Mom I'm going on an early morning walk. If you need me I have my phone on me. Love you."

I notice that it's not quite sunrise yet, so I sneak down through my neighbors yard, and head to a small creek to hang out at.

I sit on a mildly moist rock and shiver since the water soaked through my jeans. It's literally one of the grossest feelings ever. Even with an uncomfortably wet ass, I get lost in thought.

I drifted through scenarios of how this evening could go. I'm totally screwed.

This is going to go horribly. I don't even know whose in the class for fucks sake, or who the damn instructor is.

Before I know it, I feel my phone vibrate and it's a call from my mom. The usual asking when I was coming home and stuff like that. When she asked at first, I was pissed, but then I looked at the time and realized it was already 10:00

The gym time started at 3:00, so I had time to get myself prepared. I am going to be okay. I won't die. For fucks sake, I'll be fine.

I eat mac and cheese for lunch, since it was my day to pick what my mom made us. Then, I go up to my room and find the only pair of gym shorts and actual tennis shoes.

I look at myself in the mirror and realize I look like a douche bag. I look like the people I hate. I hate everything about this whole thing.

Why am I being forced to do something that will make me want to take a long walk off of a short pier?

I am, because my mom is batshit crazy. She wants me to make friends. She wants me to be the social butterfly I was when I was a fetus.

At 2:30, my mom pulls me out of my room and we head off to the gas station, so we actually make it to the gym.

I know I'm going to be late. We live 30 minutes away from the gym, but with stopping at the gas station, it added at least 5 minutes to our commute.

We get to the gas station, and of course my mom makes me go in and pay for the gas.

The girl at the counter complements my shirt. I awkwardly walk out and get back in the car.

When we get there we are about twenty five minutes late. Fantastic.

I sign in and head to where I'm supposed to go and I see a very large group of people.

"Frankie boy! What took you so long to show up? We thought you bailed on us!"

"Patrick, you're here?" I respond with surprise.

"Yeah! Come here!" Patrick opens his arms to hug me.

I take the embrace and laugh at how awkward we must look. As we let go of each other, I see Gerard.

"Oh..my....god...." I quite audibly whisper.

I can't believe this. I have to face him three days a week, and not completely swoon over him.

Fuck my life. I wanted this to be dumb and easy, but no, I have to have the one instructor that would make this a living hell.

I start to hyperventilate as I make awkward eye contact with him, and then I break.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Heyy I'm not dead I've just been busy. I'm sorry for not getting this chapter up sooner. You have permission to hit me.
Okay that's a wrap see you soon.
~
H