♡ A story about learning to love, learning to hurt, learning to 𝘣𝘭𝘦𝘦𝘥 ― and most importantly, learning to be human. ♡
𝐅𝐄𝐀𝐓𝐔𝐑𝐄𝐃 4x
Marino Hills, California in the mid-2000s is hypersensitive to the idea of change. It clings desperately t...
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THE SUMMER OF 2006 Fourth of July Party
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After five whole days of moping in his bedroom and lurking on chatrooms for gay teenagers, Felix manages to coax Jisung out of his balmy covers, into some half-decent clothes, and to Pacific Shores Mall.
According to Felix, there's a huge Fourth of July party being held at Chris', and that's too great of an opportunity to pass up on.
"Listen Ji," Felix says, rummaging through racks of H&M's Clearance section. "It's crucial that we dress to impress this time around. Eli–fuckin'–Anderson is gonna' be there."
"Yeah," Jisung hums. He loosely scans through clothes he'll never wear. "Why do I care about Eli A. again?"
"Uh, only 'cause he is the biggest douche of '06?" Felix says matter-of-factly. "Plus, Minho'll be there. If that means anything."
Jisung inhales sharply. His voice holds a tinge of skepticism as he insists: "It doesn't."
For the past five days, it's been uncomfortable for Jisung to exist within his own skin. His sinning, vermilion flesh threatens to burst from bisque skin, brimming with a reality he still can't confront confidently. Bisexual. From his research, he's certain that the term encapsulates his feelings perfectly: simultaneously attracted to women and men. Still, it doesn't feel right—being attracted to men doesn't feel right—even if it's beyond his control.
Minho Lee has been on his mind...a lot. The subtle, crooked curve that tugs on his lips, his attentive gaze through long eyelashes, the phantom of his hands slotted to Jisung's waist—something that sends arctic shivers down his spine. His heart flutters around Minho Lee like a mesmerized firefly, drawn to the enigmatic glow he emits.
It's a little nauseating. Jisung doesn't want to admit his Minho-concerned feelings to anyone but the anonymous teens in PlanetOut chatrooms.
As Felix thumbs through a row of graphic tees, he glances over at Jisung with a knowing look.
"C'mon, Sung, I can see through that lil' act of yours. It totally does mean something," Felix says with a teasing glint in his voice. "Think about it: I get to show Eli what he's missin' and you get to let Minho be your gay awakening."
Jisung sighs into his palms. "Please, stop saying 'gay awakening'."
Felix pauses in his shopping spree, peering at Jisung with a raised brow. "Ji, y'know...I thought you'd be fine after I gave you some space. What's going on?"
