I Need Help But I Don't Care (Kel Angst)

Chapter 14

Hero

It's been two weeks since everything happened. I still haven't been at school, because it just doesn't feel right to not go with Kel. But, then again he might not even wake up. If I'm being honest, I'm fucking terrified. I've been at the hospital as much a possible. Basil and Aubrey stay here after school. We got him a few gifts and we talk to him.

Throughout this whole period I couldn't stop thinking about everything I saw, and how I didn't stop him. How I saw him cut his arms. How I saw him hate himself. How I saw him panic. How I saw him not realize the things that goes on around him sometimes. It's like sometimes he's there but not fully there. But I watched him hurt and did nothing about it.

Right now we're all sitting in the room with Kel. Aubrey and Basil are talking about school as I hold his hand thinking. Then I feel it twitching. His hand was twitching, is this a good or a bad thing. My eyes widen. I guess they noticed because they both ask "what's wrong?" I responded with "H-His hand is twitching"
Their eyes widen as the run over to see. His hand slowly tightens around mine. The heart monitor is beeping faster. His eyelids flutter. Basil leaves to get a nurse. "Kel?" I say with hopes that he'll wake up. Basil and the nurse walk in. His eyes slowly open.

Kel

Suddenly everything is dark. I hear my friends and my brother talking sometimes to me. But I can't see them and they can't hear me. It's frustrating. But soon I started to feel things around me like someone holding my hand. I don't know who it is but I'm desperate for connection at this point so I use all my strength to move my hand around the other. It worked. Then I realized I can try to open my eyes, I mean how hard can it be? ...It can be super hard... I use all my strength to try to open my eyes, it doesn't work. But I still keep trying until my eyes slowly open.

Everything is super bright. But once my vision clears I see Aubrey, Basil, and Hero. My heart is beating super fast. What's going on. My breathing becomes fast. I bring my legs to my chest and curl into a ball. The nurse comes up to me. "Do you know your name?" She asks. I look up at her and I try to respond but I'm unable to out of nervousness. This hasn't happened since I was eleven. I nodded. "I think she understood what was happening so she stepped back and went to go get her equipment to check my vitals.

I can hear the sound of the heart monitor going very fast. Hero came closer. He put his hand on my knee. "Kel, your ok calm down." He said in a calm voice. I breath in and out. I do this for awhile before calming down. Aubrey speaks up. "We missed you idoit." That's when I realized that they were all tearing up and also the fact I was in a hospital. That's when it all came back to me, the fight, the cuts, and the pills. Oh. I wasn't meant to survive that.

The heart monitor speeds up again but Hero interrupts. "We all are glad you're ok, we're happy your here Kel." That's when I tear up. I lay down. I just stare at the ceiling as the watch. But after a couple of minutes I realize I don't know how long I've been here. I sit up and open my mouth to speak. But nothing comes out they all notice this and since they grew up with me they knew what was happening so Basil took out a notepad and pencil he carried around and hands it to me. I start to shakily write 'How long ?' Hero speaks up. "It's been two weeks." Aubrey and Basil nodded. I write 'fuck.' They chuckle. 'Mom and Dad, mad..'
"They are wrong to be mad at you for being in a hospital so don't worry about them." Hero states sounding irritated at them. The nurse comes in and takes my vitals. I spent the rest of the day listening to Aubrey and Basil talk about school. I know I should be happy but I just don't want to be here. I want to die.