I never imagined having this kind of life. Since childhood I've been neglected. It's so hard for me growing up pretending that I am wanted as a child. Even though my young self knew that I am the biggest mistake my Dad and Mom made.
I understood that when I was five. People around kept on repeating that I am made by mistake. Noong una hindi ko pa iyon maintindihan but when I met Hezekiah, he was the one who made me understand everything.
He ruined my childhood back then but I never thought he would fix me now that we grew up. Imagine, iyong sumira ng buhay ko noon siya na ang bumubuo sa'kin ngayon. Funny, right.
"Where do you want to go next?"
My thoughts were interrupted when this man beside me with his arms around my waist spoke. I didn't answer him for seconds. I was thinking what country I want to go to.
We are currently here in Australia, our first country we decided to travel after our engagement party.
Two months ago we went back to the Philippines to announce our relationship. Bumalik din ako dahil gusto kong makausap ang pamilya ko. I don't know, I just want them to know what I feel for having me bilang kataksilan nila.
Especially my mom, I talked to her before my engagement with Hezekiah because I don't want a piece of me incomplete before I make my own family.
"How are you, darling?" she asked me as she hugged and gave me cheek kisses.
Ngumiti ako sa kanya ng marahan at tinanggap ang yakap at mga halik niya. Kahit alam ko sa sarili kong may hinanakit pa rin ako sa kanya dahil sa pananakit niya sa'kin.
Ni hindi man niya ako noon matanong kung kumusta ako o anong nararamdaman ko. But after all those things, I still forgive my Mom.
"I'm fine, mommy. How are you? Adaline and Tito?" I asked even though my voice sounded bitter uttering her husband's name.
Even now, I'm still disgusted with her husband for harassing me before. Kahit wala mang aksyong ginawa, it doesn't mean wala akong nakuhang trauma mula sa kanya.
"They're all good," she said as I stared at her eyes.
I'm not sure if that is regret visible in her eyes right now. Pero for what? For bringing me to this world? For letting me live?
Hindi ako nagsalita at ganoon din siya. She just looked away and stared at nowhere.
After minutes of silence, she looked at me. Ang pagsisisi sa mga mata niya ay hindi nawala. I can still see it.
"You know, I was scared when I had you," she started as she looked away again. "It was a big big mistake I had done with Clarence, Caprice. I didn't know what to do before... Until I told your father about my pregnancy. You know what he did?"
I didn't speak because I badly wanted to know my mother's side about their story involving me. Hanggang ngayon hindi pa rin sa'kin tinuon ni Mom ang mga mata nita.
I felt like she's guilty that's why she can not look me in the eyes.
"He said... he will tell about it to his wife and I should do the same. He... he took responsibility, Caprice. Kahit parehas kaming may sariling pamilya... Hindi niya tinalikuran ang pagkakamaling ginawa namin," she stuttered.
Alam ko, alam kong ako ang tinutukoy niyang pagkakamali. Tears started to form in her eyes at ganoon din sa'kin. Ito 'yung gusto kong marining, e. Ito iyon, Caprice.
"While me on the other hand thought of... aborting you because I can not face the mistake I had done." Then her tears fell. Yumuko siya at sinubukang punasan ang mga luha niya.
BINABASA MO ANG
WOMANIZER'S LITTLE GIRL #2
Romance"He's way older than me, but he never cared. He's my brother's cousin, the reason why our relationship was hidden." - Caprice Ishii Villaceran Matured content.
