Its not order its balance (Discord x Reader Story)

chapter 6: EG SUCKS.

Glaedr: Now I know there's a lot of discussion about whether or not EG is canon but from what I understand there were some episodes of EG in the last season along with a special on netflix in which Sunset reconciles with Celestia so that counts as canon for me. Also, in my universe EVERYTHING will belong to the universe, I know it will lead to some inconsistencies with Sombra and the whole story, but I'll fix it. And you too.

Right now you seriously hated the universe.

Or maybe the author more specifically.

Editor: You too can rot in hell

You are there right now, thank you.

But outside of your fourth-wall ultra sensations you feel like you're about to step into one of the world's most hated kid's show productions.

And also for some reason you agreed to meet Twilight's daughter-in-law. That she is a princess of love or something.

It's not like just because of the love aspect you are paralyzed with terror because she can control the feelings or anything like that.

You've had enough with Aphrodite's bitch.

You were in a kingdom made entirely of Crystal, even the ponies! It made you want to turn into a dragon and make a dirty joke about how you wanted to taste everyone but you were too tired to care.

But of course these ponies won't leave you alone you started to hear a scandal and you felt a familiar interdimensional energy...

You walked to where the current took you (that is, to where your half-asleep mind considered that someone could prepare you some scrambled eggs with chocolate) and surprise! you found the portal to the bizarre world of humans where you raised Celestia and Luna. You stood aside as you watched the mane six and the princesses discuss this "else place".

Fed up with his melodrama you decided to make an act of presence.

Y/N: I know what's on the other side, I'll get that stupid crown back while you guys stay here and try not to destroy the mirror while I'm gone, thanks. I have been there before.

You approached the mirror while you continued to listen with indifference to the talk they carried between them. In the end you just asked the princess of friendship if she was ready yet.

Y/N: Have you already said goodbye? I don't mind. Come on princess.

You jumped into the portal while in a red-haired yak form. You knew what happened if you traveled from the pony world as a human, it was...uncomfortable.

.

.

.

The spiral of colors enveloped you and you heard the pony and the dragon screaming in the distance for the new experience completely unknown to them. You felt that the portal was turning Spike into something that you didnt like the idea so you decided to help him a little and give it a slight change.

With complete calm you left the portal standing as if you had gotten up from a chair you were wearing a tuxedo but you forgot a small detail in your head.

Y/N: Huh? Ah never mind I'll keep the feathers.

You had indigenous feathers on your head along with a cultural make-up that you didn't bother to remember where you get from.

Familiar screams rang out again and visitors were thrown from the portal falling behind you. Because you're a gentleman, you helped Twilight Sparkle up after the initial shock of seeing you as a human, and she also turned to Spike.

Twilight: Hey Spike, are you alright...

Behind Twilight Spike instead of the portal wanted, Spike was in human form with a little elvish ears and green hair with a purple tuxedo and a six-pack.

Twilight started to blush but you didn't have time for this. After helping Twilight learn to walk on two legs (Spike, champ, had it mastered) and you just let them explore the place while you went to the address at once.

You quickly greeted Luna and Celestia and asked where the crown was. You went there and traded it for a fake. You caught up with the subdirectories and at night you did a patrol before closing the school and you saw that Twilight wanted to sleep in the library but you refused and gave her some money to pay for a decent hotel.

You spent the rest of the next day playing cards with Celestia while Luna tried to scare them off and failed miserably. When the coronation came you just looked from afar and saw all the drama. So you watched as Sunset put on the crown and...

Absolutely nothing happened.

You saw how Sunset got desperate because her plan didn't work and you came out of the shadows

Y/N: Did you really think an element of harmony would work on you?

Sunset turned to me and stuttered.

Sunset: D-director Y/N?! But what?! What...

Y/N: Please. I am the principal of this school. Did you think I wouldn't know that there's literally a portal in the middle of my school? That is just silly. And what was your plan? Lead a hundred untrained teenagers in battle to try to conquer Equestria?

Sunset: B-but - she started crying

Y/N: Plus, I have the real crown - you took it out of your jacket

.

.

You saw exactly what happened exactly at that moment but it still confused you. Sunset somehow managed to get the crown (which didn't involve you messing with it and accidentally dropping it) and when she put it on it caused her to transform into some kind of demon. You raised an eyebrow at this: You were the only one with demonic magic in both worlds; you had checked.

As a fight scene and hypnotization unfolded behind your back while you pulled out your cell phone and dialed a specific familiar number.

Y/N: Harmony what the fuck are you doing?!

Harmony: Oh come on! I just want to have a little fun you know technically I'm your daughter I must inherit something from you right?

Y/N: I can create an alternate timeline where the elements are yanderes so you can have your "fun"...

Harmony: what?! Nope! Ugh. Okay, I'll stop her, Fine? With the time passing I forget how you hate hypocrisy sometimes.

You saw how everything was arranged and Sunset was forced to rebuild the entrance. Your nieces called you out for not telling them about the portal but after an emotional talk they let you go back to the other universe.

You stood in front of the statue and said goodbye to the girls.

Y/N: Well, shall we go? I have better things to do.

You jumped through the portal and Spike and Twilight followed shortly after.

You saw all the drama with the friends but a certain orange pegasus collided with the alicorn.

Flash Sentry: Excuse me, princess, I didn't see you...

Before you even gave him prominence you beat the fucking asshole out of the crystal empire. Twilight looked at you

Y/N: what? I had to do something useful in this chapter! Everybody hates that fucking pegasus.

You just walked out of there humming Winter Warm Up

Ah yes, you were in One Punch Man form.

You didn't think that idiot would ever show up again.

Maybe you'd have to do necromancy later to resurrect him so Celestia wouldn't get the shit out of you.