For those who have read my chapters, you know how clumsy I have been. Well, here is a little something about my infant years.
When I was 6 months old, I crawled out of my crib. The side was down and evidently I'd just learned how to crawl - my Dad likes to joke about how I was a bruise waiting to happen. I fell onto the wooden floor and had a huge goose egg in the middle of my forehead, right in time for my 1st Christmas. All the family photos are in black & white because we didn't have the 'special film for color pics. That is a blessing since you couldn't see the lovely purple, green & yellow color. The bump is noticeable since it's in the middle of my forehead but didn't show too badly in those pictures.
Back in the 70s, it was a huge thing for every family to have portraits taken for the holidays. JC Pennys was out family's go to portrait store. Every single time, I had a bruise somewhere that was very visible. The cow kick bruise on my left wrist that showed because of the dress my Mom chose. The fall down three stairs healing scab on my cheek & left side of my neck - I banged up against the doorway at the bottom. The multiple bruises I've had while learning how to walk, from tearing around the kitchen during cookie baking time & getting hit by the rolling pin when it fell off the table,playing outside and face planting because I didn't know ice was slippery (I had a huge distrust of ice for years after that). Every single fa,ily portrait appointment my Mom made, she would make a bet with my Dad about how long before I'd... whoops! Mom won that bet!
Now, let's get into family birthdays, holidays or celebrations. I would somehow either be bruised up somewhere or I'd get hurt at the family get together. My Aunt Dorothy would always host Easter at her home. I would normally be fine right up to dinner time. One year, I decided to try a beer that my cousin Greg snuck (he is 2 years older). We not only got sick but spilt beer all over ourselves so sick plus sticky. I tripped over a tree trunk in her yard and stirred up a hornets nest that was inside it. BothGreg and myself got stung pretty badly and that wasn't the worst part, they put apple cider vinegar on all the stings and while it took away the pain, we stunk. One Christmas Greg got a skateboard, took it outside on the very snowy hill, ended up breaking his arm, I was so upset and tried torun down the hill to get my Aunt Edie, I tripped over the broken skateboard, scraped up my hands and knees from the road and had an inch long splinter in my thumb.
My other cousin Allison is 2 years younger than me and my brother is 6 years younger than her. We would play hide & seek & tag outside on my Grandparents poultry farm. While hiding in the turkey pen with my little brother, they attacked us. I got Andy over the fence but I ended up with ripped jeans and gashes from their damn ninja-sword feet . We've crashed thru chicken coops, the door to the rabbit shed and have gotten kicked by baby emus. They are adorable but they will gang up on you fast.
I've had a full pot of potato water spilled on me, fell thru the screen door a few times because it was invisible (I swear it really was!),fallen off the barn a few times, out of trees, bruised from a tomato fight in the garden, snow/ice balls being flucooncatng full force at me during epic snow battles.. this goes on thru my entire life. Even up to when I went into labor with my son,I was trying to go wake up my husband and ran right into the open cabinet door. The day I turned 49,I got mule kicked by our Maine Coon cat, ended up with a black eye, fell off the bed and dislocated my ankle- broke both my bones & severed a vein. I've been so used to this, I crawled across the bed to grab my phone to take a picture of it before I yelled for my husband.
The reason for this story was a talk with my brother yesterday. He was joking about how the 1st baby picture we have with him at his 1st family gathering, he had this huge goose egg in the middle of his forehead. My Dad said that Ihad the exact same goose egg for my 1st pic too. I remember my Dad saying to my Mom "please dear god, don't let him take after Kathryn". This got a good laugh out of Andy because he remembers every time he got a bruise, bump, scratches, any injuries at all, my Dad would thank God its nowhere near a family gathering.
The clumsiness isn't hereditary,my son has only has 1 school picture with a goose egg and that was because he told another kid to watch while he jumped off a lunch table.
