1.Tired

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1.

I never deserve the things I need
I was meant to live my life alone
Nothing's ever good enough
(On My Honor-Tired)



The alarm was ringing, annoying. Carina woke up and turned it off. She rubbed her eyes and snorted. All she wanted was to stay in bed and keep sleeping but of course she couldn't. Next to her, Maya was still asleep, snoring softly. Carina could do nothing but smile at that sight. After all they went through, seeing her wife there, in their bed, always made her cry happy tears. Their love had been stronger than everything and they were still there, together, despite everything and everyone.

"Ti amo." Carina whispered, sweetly kissing Maya's hair. She got up and headed to the bathroom, then prepared herself some coffee and had breakfast. Once finished she got dressed and collected her own stuff, ready to leave the house and go to work.

"You didn't wake me up." Maya mumbled, her eyes still shut despite her being up. Carina smiled and stepped forward to her.

"That's because you need to sleep. You had a pretty intense shift yesterday, you deserve to rest."

"Mmh-mmh." Maya just replied, without opening her eyes. Carina chuckled and gently kissed her.

"Ti amo." she whispered. "See you later." she waved her goodbye.

"'later." Maya mumbled, going back to bed. Carina giggled and left the apartment, not really wanting to. She got in her car and took her wallet out of her purse. She opened it and let out a sigh, an old photograph in her hand. It pictured Andrea and her, happily building a sand castle on the beach. She remembered that summer so well. They had spent the whole time at their grandparents' beach house. Their grandpa who kept buying them ice cream, their grandma cooking all the time and teaching them her recipes, her brother playing with her, all those memories hit her all of a sudden, so painful and healing at the same time. She felt a tear rolling down her cheek and wiped it with the back of her hand. She put the photograph back in the wallet and started the car. She missed Andrea so much, everyday. Also, she hated leaving Maya, especially when the blonde had a free day. Things between them were going much better now, but they were still adjusting to that new phase of their life. Moreover, they had discussed about their desire of having a baby and in the end they had come to the conclusion that wasn't the right time. They had just gone back to normal and they needed to be careful. And that awareness hurt so much. Her phone ringing forced her to awaken from her thoughts.

"Bailey, hey."

"DeLuca, hi. Listen, are you at the hospital?" Bailey asked.

"Not yet, but I'm on my way. I'll be there in ten."

"Okay, great. Please, can you come to my office before starting your shift? I have something to discuss with you.". Carina frowned, a bit alarmed.

"Is everything okay? I mean, did I do anything wrong?" she questioned, anxious.

"It's nothing serious, don't worry. It's about the clinic, they sent me some data about the affluence and I'd love you to see them, so that we can help those women in a better way." Miranda explained. Carina breathed in relief.

"That's great, really. See you later.". She kept driving, until she finally arrived at Grey's Sloan. She parked the car and got out of it, headed to the entrance of the hospital. She was about to cross the threshold, when someone bumped her and all of a sudden she found herself on the ground. She raised her gaze. In front of her there was a girl who should have been about sixteen years old, with black hair and two incredibly blue eyes that were  nervously staring at her. Next to her there was an old blue skateboard, quite battered.

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