Attack on Titan: Survival and Dedication - Male Reader

PART TWO

Alessandra considered the very idea of a painless end. They could gather all of their resources and have a grand feast, or the closest thing to it.
   They had plenty of ammo and an armful of rifles, that would be a quick and easy out. Maybe they could help one another.
   She shook her head and immediately regretted it. Her thoughts were jumbled and vision blurred. The lack of food and water put her on the edge of many cliffs, but being so close to death had her peering down each one with more thought than fear.
   Her book slipped from her grasp, thumping on the wooden floor and shocking sleep out of her system. The sound was similar to a gunshot in her muddled mind and for just a moment she felt an adrenaline rush.
   However, as the nonexistent gun fired and her eyes widened, she was confronted with the harsh reality of war.
   She blinked and blinked again but couldn't shake the screams etched into memory. The smell of bloated, decaying corpses didn't help either.
   She braced herself against Yvonne as her vision darkened and her breathing became shallow. The other nurses were asleep, too tired to notice her descent into her mind.
   "Hold him still!" She remembered Dr. Yeager telling her sternly.
   She held a soldier down by the shoulders, keeping him still with the help of his comrades as he screamed the same word over and over again.
   "NO! NO NO NO!" He didn't want to lose his leg and fought with everything he had. He grabbed the cot and leveraged his arm away while snapping at her extended forearms, trying to rip chunks of flesh away.
   He shook with great effort, but in the end, the good doctor placed his saw above his knee, leaving a kiss of cold, stained metal, and began to saw away.
   The soldier howled in agony while a chorus of footsteps and gunfire thundered outside.
   Alessandra worked well under pressure, at least, that's what she liked to think. In reality, she was numb to the world she planted herself in, numb to all the screams and nonstop gunfire.
   "We have another one over here!" A nurse shouted, redirecting a few more soldiers to help stop the pouring of blood from a young man's chest.
   "You two! Hold this here!" A nurse frantically barked orders while her hands were coated in blood.
   "I said hold him still damnit!" Dr. Yeager shouted.
   "Clamp it! I got it, clamp it!" An artery was cut and a doctor's hand was buried deep in an officer's shoulder.
   "HEADS DOWN!"
   Thunder cracked and rumbled over the battlefield, snapping Alessandra out of her foggy state.
She hadn't noticed the cold, calloused hand gripping her wrist until now. Grounding her to the quiet staccato of war.
   "Relax." She heard Yvonne say. "Breathe..."
   She took in a gulp of air; her chest stuttering while doing so. Her tightened throat opened, making her gasp and choke on the air of blackened flesh.

Rain pattered against a nearby canvas, allowing its cold essence to funnel into an empty bowl.
A nurse drank greedily from the cold metal, doing so until they felt as if their stomach would burst or they would barf it all back up.
   Alessandra watched with darting eyes and her tongue dragging over her lips. She wanted to stand and do the same but Yvonne kept her in place.
   "What is it?" Alessandra nearly snapped.
   "It's no use." Yvonne shook her head. "Leave it."
   "What?" She attempted to rip her hand away but Yvonne's grip was solid.
   "Just watch." She said before letting her go.
   Yvonne didn't need to see to know what would happen next, and Alessandra watched it all unfold.
   The nurse's stomach squeezed and her hunger made water more of a poison than a lifeline.
Not one moment later they held their stomach as they collapsed to their knees. Alessandra couldn't watch and only listened as they vomited.
   "You don't have any salt?" Yvonne asked.
   "No." She whispered.
   "S'no use, then." The soldier sighed. "Best you can do is take little sips..."
   Alessandra wanted to ask how she knew then it all came back to her. Yvonne wasn't any ordinary soldier. Not a conscript or reserve, but a willing and ferocious shock trooper. The difference between the two was night and day, and that not only brought clarity but hope.
   "How are you?" She hissed and walked over to her side. "Can you sit up?"
   "A little." Yvonne grunted as she helped her up. "Why?"
   "And can you stand?"
   "Why?" She repeated with urgency.
   "I think we can—we—" She paused in thought; realization dawning on her divided and hopeless self. "You can leave. You could run."
   "Right." Yvonne coughed. "And go where?"
   "I-I don't know, but—!"
   "We're dead." She whispered as if to read it off a stone slab. "So show some dignity and accept your fate."
   Her fate. The words hit Alessandra like a full-speed train. Her heart thumped and actually hurt with an unseen pinch. The feeling made her lose all feeling in her outstretched hand, leaving just the rain tapping and flowing through canvas.