Attack on Titan: Survival and Dedication - Male Reader

PART FIVE

Y/N found company in the stables. The horses stuck to themselves and hadn't really paid him much mind, but that's something he desperately needed right now.
  Erwin had assigned him a horse long before their travel to Shiganshina. Y/N didn't know its name or what it was in terms of gender and breed. The most he knew was that it was fast; among the fasted in the corp.
  The tall beast sauntered over. It had a lazy air about it, like sleep was just on the cusp of overflowing and claiming its day.
  Its nose bumped his bent arms, catching a whiff of his clothes with a loud snort before nodding and walking away. It was a strange but unique characteristic, putting it apart from two dozen other horses with their brown coats and black manes.
  The cold air took its grip on Y/N's mask, consuming it with frost after each breath he took. Had there been somewhere to sit he could see his evening spent here.
  "Hey."
  Y/N didn't attempt to hide or stifle the sigh leaving him. Dita, a squad leader, was one of the few who looked after the horses. It wasn't his job but he prided himself in it.
  "I didn't expect to see you here." The older man approached with a huff and smile. "Came to see Nodric, huh?"
  Nodric?
  "Get it?" In the corner of his eyes, Y/N spotted a wide grin on Dita's face. The pun had flown right over his head and now Y/N wished he hadn't heard it.
  "Ah." He waved a dismissive hand. "He's come a long way since you first brought him over."
  "This is the same horse??" Y/N asked, surprised.
  "Yeah." Dita chuckled. "A pretty good find, too."
  "Hmm. Some bandits used him for a wagon."
  "Their loss." He snorted. "Nodric here would be worth a small fortune. But... you just can't put a price on survivability."
  "Mm."
  "Anyway." He hefted a pitchfork over his shoulder and waved. "I gotta get back to it. Congrats on the promotion by the way."
 Nodric. Y/N repeated the name one more time. This time with a small appreciation for Dita's naming.
 Fancy name for a fancy horse.

Y/N was partly relieved and partly sorry that Petra wasn't in the basement. It was Eld who joined him for now.
  Eld wasn't very talkative. He was a man of very few words, and Y/N not only respected that, he liked it.
  "Lemme know if you need anything." He said before going back to a plate of rations and a cup of wine.
"Mhm."
  That was the extent of their conversation for the remainder of the day.

Time moved in a blur. It was one of the few times monotony played in the background while wine was the orchestrator.
  With an empty bottle standing between him and Eld, Y/N set aside the frame of a half-finished product. Eld lifted the other half while setting aside his drink.
  A sweet smell and taste hid the strong smell of oil in the room. Both men wanted to open the window but didn't want to diminish what little heat their small fire produced.
  Y/N felt a small buzz coming on, dulling the pain in the back of his head. The dizzy sensation and warmth pooling in his stomach were rather pleasant. He rode out his limited high in his chair and before the small wood stove nearby.
  "Break?" Eld asked.
  Y/N only offered the smallest and laziest waves in response. His fellow Scout collected their empty glasses and headed upstairs; momentarily exposing them to the late evening rush within the base.
  "I hope you got enough sleep!"
  The alluring sensation of a nap was interrupted. Y/N flinched awake with his heart in his throat, earning a coo from Hange.
  "Sorry." She whispered with her hand running through his hair.
  "I had enough." Y/N sighed. He chased her hand away and settled in.
  "You did all of this??" She gasped. "But—but the throttle! The winch!"
  "I handled it." Y/N nearly grumbled in response.
  "And the joints?! Were they—!"
  "Yes."
  She looked over his work with an equally trained eye. She glossed over system checks, the harness itself, and the basics of every mechanism within.
  "I underestimated you, it would seem." She gave a small but joyous chuckle. "I suppose that's what you mean when you said that you lay low."
  "I got paid today so had a bit more inspiration." He joked and almost slurred.
  For once Hange could see him fully relaxed. He looked one step away from falling asleep or breaking out in laughter. For all she knew he could do both.
  "When are we leaving?"
  "Eager, are we?" Given her lack of urgency, he knew he had some time to himself.
  "Hm."
  "What's wrong?" She pivoted, scraping the floor with the quick and sudden movement. "You're grumpy."
  "I talked about it enough already."
  "And you're drunk." She sighed, noticing his slur.
  He waved her off. He was done talking and made it clear.
  "Did Eld give you a hard time?" She hummed. "No. Was it Petra?"
  It wasn't hard to see that Petra had a soft spot for newcomers, especially the Cadets.
  "Of course it was." She said to herself. She didn't hold it to Petra, but she was everything he avoided personified.
  "I'll have a talk with her." Her mind was made. But as sweet and attentive as the gesture was, Y/N didn't have the heart for something so small but he perceived as cruel.
  "It's okay." He sighed. "I'll tell her myself... Later."
Although he hoped his message was clear enough for Petra to understand.
  "Very well..." She descended the steps and got back to work. With her at his six he could only hear the faintest rustling of clothing and paper.
  Perhaps it was a matter of trust that conveyed him to talk. An intimate but safe feeling that made conversation easy and loosened his tongue. He was sure it was that but didn't know how Hange would respond when next he spoke.
  "When we first met..." He paused with thought and hesitation. The words he strung together were foreign and sounded more intimate than he intended. Either way, Hange didn't interject.
  "Mm... Nevermind." It felt wrong to say.
  She didn't pry for a continuation or poke and prod to satisfy her curiosity. She merely hummed in acknowledgment.
It was the aforementioned feeling he experienced; a warm shelter where nothing could bother him.
  He remembered the feel of her mail in his hands. The rough parchment was complimented with a secured string, keeping whatever heavy material inside safe.
  It was one of the first deliveries he made for the Scouting Regiment. The first of many in fact. The heavy sack of gold Erwin had handed him made sure of that. He not only paid for his services but kept him on a fair retainer.
  "You... walked all the way this way??"
  Y/N didn't want to make small talk. He was already paid and ready for bed but people had gathered around, both amazed and in good spirits with letters from families and loved ones.
  "Thank you!" She cheered with her package in one hand and the other offered in greeting and gratitude.
  Y/N took one look at her hand and another at the stars twinkling in her eyes and walked away.
  "Wha—?? Hold on!" She carried herself with a bounce in each step and a grin so wide it edged on maniacal.
  "How did you get through the plains?! The Titans?! And on foot?!" Her questions came one after the other, overwhelming him with the many wonders a child would have.
  Her distant and muffled activity came to a close when she crouched at his side; her arms bent on his armrest and uncovered eyes intertwined with his own.
  He'd forgotten what he was going to ask but the nagging feeling at the back of his mind was gone. Replacing it was the same light sensation he had recently begun to carry in her presence.
  And to think that was only six months ago...
  Her lips curved into a smile. It was an emotion she rarely carried outside of her research and talk of Titans. But it made it feel all the more special.
  Y/N's hand twitched before twisting his wrist and opening his closed hand. The callous and oil-stained flesh was complimented by hers, creating a rugged bond.
  She squeezed his hand as hard as he squeezed hers, testing the limits of their growing relationship with trust and consideration in mind.
  His eyes eventually drifted back to the crackling fire, highlighting the weight he carried throughout the day.

Nights had become long during the winter. The moment the shadow of Rose covered Trost activity died down significantly.
  "When they say the Garrison is lazy I didn't expect this." Moblit mused. Everyone agreed with him there but Y/N already knew.
  They looked down at the whispering giant. Getting to the top of Rose was easy but tricky. Y/N had done it more than enough times to have it memorized but couldn't account for Hange's whole squad with unwavering confidence.
  "Send it back down." Hange ordered. Nifa send the lift back down, cutting out the bribe Y/N would usually make.
  "Are you ready?" Hange asked. Not being used to her serious demeanor, Y/N merely nodded.
  His clothes hugged him with a comforting warmth. The new clothes he acquired were sure to keep him hidden among the knee-high snow.
  "Won't our anchors leave blemishes on the wall?" Lauda asked in a whisper.
  "It should snow tonight. If it doesn't they hardly check this section." Y/N explained.
  "We'll cover it up just in case." Hange nodded. "For now let's get going."
  Their packs rustled and hanging snow shoes clacked as they got into position. And in an uncharacteristic show of nervousness, Y/N hung back.
  With only the winter chill running down their backs, Hange offered her hand and waited.
  Their dead had lent their rigs for this small trip. Erwin had chosen to never log their return. They were statistically lost beyond Wall Rose and unrecoverable.
  "We couldn't have gotten another rig?" Y/N asked, doubtful.
  "You think I planned this?" She asked with an incredulous grin. "Unfortunately, my dear, I wasn't clever enough to plan that far ahead."
  "You won't drop me?" He asked, mired in anxiety.
  "No, I won't drop you!" She hissed with a chuckle. "Now, let's go. We're wasting time."
  "And if you drop me??"
  "I'll catch you!"
  "Alright..." Y/N took a deep breath and took her offered hand. He avoided her gaze, earning an amused hum. "Now what?"
  "Now... just hang on." She beckoned with a slight pull, closing the distance until he felt the slightest warmth of her breath gliding over his face mask.
  His hesitation and awkward air amused her greatly, he knew that. But he also knew it was in an endearing way.
  He settled with an awkward hug. One arm over the shoulder and one arm under with both hands linked at the back. Hange seemed pleased with his choice and acted.
  In one swift but reassuring movement, she anchored them down and stepped back. Their weight tested the anchors with a painful creak. However, the sound soon faded as the rig's inner winch whirred as its spool of metal wire was expended and the wind billowed in his hood.
  Before he knew it they were greeted with the fluffy snow below. The landing was gentle by all means, but it was the first proper landing Y/N partook in with ODM gear.
  "See?" Hange huffed a laugh. "You're fine."
  "Shit." He hissed in response. A sharp pain rippled up from the soles of his feet and remained in a tingly vibration.
  Hange stepped back and steadied him. She rubbed his extended arms in a comforting manner; long enough for the heat to travel through his clothes and the pain to subside.
  "Okay." He gave his legs a good stretch and turned to the sky. If it wasn't a life or death situation he would say it was somewhat fun.
  "Are you okay?" She asked. Again, her smile was there to greet him.
  "Alive." He nodded.
  "Good." She chirped and let go.
  If it wasn't pitch black with dark clouds hanging overhead Y/N was sure the others would have been staring. Although he was relieved he didn't think Hange would have cared if they did.