Recovery Period

Chapter 23

Raina continued to wait for Nico's response, glancing at the TV screen in front of her while the movie she'd selected played quietly. She wasn't sure how far she should really push Nico. Bandaging her foot was a necessity, but forcing a bottle into her was certainly not.

"I'm just going to go grab a cup for that, no worries," she said, lifting Nico off her lap and setting her on the couch next to her. "Is chocolate milk okay or do you want some water?"

"I um..." Nico murmured, clearly uncomfortable. She didn't say more, so Raina sat down on the ottoman across from her and leaned in a little.

"What's up?"

"...I have to pee," Nico finally answered. She seemed embarrassed to have to ask, but Raina wasn't sure why.

"That's it?" Raina asked with an eyebrow raised.

"Yes...?" Nico replied, tilting her head in confusion.

"Okay, let me help you. Bathroom's just down the hall." Raina reached for Nico, who leaned back toward the couch with her hands up in front of her chest.

"I've got it," Nico assured Raina.

"Uh, the hell you do. You cannot walk on that foot unless you want more stitches. You already popped one running away from me earlier. Twice," Raina said firmly with her arms folded.

"I-" Nico began, stopping short when she imagined her foot and her stomach flipped over.

"Woah there," Raina said. She placed her hands on Nico's shoulders and pushed her against the couch. "Deep breaths, Nico. Your foot is okay but it can't take more walking."

Nico nodded mutely and let Raina drag her up onto her good leg.

Raina desperately wanted to just scoop Nico up and be done with it, but she wasn't about to push her luck again so soon. Instead of carrying her, Raina tucked herself under Nico's arm on her bad side, ushering them out of the living room and into the hall in a clumsy side-shuffle. They were certainly not going to win any 3-legged races.

They made it into the bathroom and Raina got Nico near the toilet before letting go and excusing herself. She closed the door behind her and called through the wood, "Let me know when you're done."

Nico didn't reply, making quick work of emptying her overly-full bladder. She was really bad about knowing when she had to go, always had been. The urge wouldn't hit her until she was close to bursting. It certainly made for some...dire situations.

She sat there for a while in the silence, wondering what to do next. If she went back to cuddling with Raina on the couch, she'd slip for sure. Was that what she wanted to have happen?

Yes.

No.

Yes.

No.

Please.

"God dammit," she said aloud. She put her face in her hands and rubbed at the frustration headache right behind her eyes. This argument was getting old. She never fought with herself like this.

But she also hadn't been little outside of her apartment in a long time, certainly not with someone else participating alongside her. She knew she'd have had that bottle in her mouth in a second at home, but with Raina? That was tough.

Outside the bathroom, Raina waited to hear if Nico fell and then ducked into the living room to grab the bottle. She snagged it, took it to the kitchen and transferred it into a regular glass. She was setting it on the side table in the living room just as she heard the bathroom door opening.

"Hey, hey, hey! What did I say about that foot?" Raina asked as she rushed down the hall. She stooped a bit to get under Nico's arm and ushered her back to the couch. Raina got her seated and then pointed at the glass.

"You need to drink something, okay? It's been a long time since your IV fluids."

Nico nodded and picked up the glass, nearly dropping it in the process. She stabilized with her other hand and took a long drink without seeing the momentary panic on Raina's face when the cup almost hit the floor.

Raina was relieved that Nico was getting something in her system and that the glass had avoided another shut down. She could work with shy. Dissociative was another monster entirely.

They sat quietly in the living room, listening to the movie play without watching it. Eventually Raina heard the familiar clink of an empty glass on a wood table. She glanced at Nico, who yawned behind a cupped hand.

"You ready to sleep for a while?" Raina asked.

"Maybe? Where do you want me to sleep?" Nico replied, suddenly nervous that she'd have to sleep in the bedroom alone. She was nervous to sleep anywhere, really, but alone in a stranger's house? Pass.

"Well I brought all these blankets out here so that we can sleep on the couch, but I guess you could sleep in the guest room again if you want," Raina said with a casual shoulder shrug.

"No here is good."

Raina's next question was on the tip of her tongue, but she hesitated. She was struggling with where to push and when and how hard. Nico was difficult to read and she had a feeling that's because Nico couldn't read herself.

Nico sat on the couch, squeezing her hands between her knees. She'd spent most of her time in the bathroom trying to get the argument in her head to stop. She wasn't terribly successful, but they were a bit more tame now.

She wasn't used to this anymore, this back and forth in her mind. The numbness was so...quiet. And that's how she spent most days: numb but functional. This was too much to handle.

She had to admit, though, she felt better with something in her stomach. Chocolate milk could fix anything.

Raina sat down next to her silent house guest and looked at Nico in surprise when she jumped. "Sorry, didn't mean to startle you," Raina said. Nico must have been deep in thought.

"How about we get settled and get some sleep? It's almost 2am," she said, glancing at her watch. She would be paying for this late night all week long, especially if they weren't asleep soon.

Nico nodded, but didn't move from her spot on the couch. She wasn't entirely sure where she should sit or lay or whatever.

Raina sighed and bent at the waist, locking eyes with Nico. "It must be so loud in that head of yours," she said softly, grazing Nico's cheek with back of her finger  sweetly.

"It is," Nico whispered, closing her eyes at Raina's touch. It was so addictive. She had to swallow the whimper in her throat when Raina withdrew her hand, barely able to conceal the pout she felt on her lip.

Raina, paying close attention to all of Nico's cues, saw the brief, quickly-disguised frown before it disappeared. And that was all she needed.