my ex is a pornstar ¦ yoonseok

chapter 9: JHS

i don't know why i dragged him to a hotel. my mind just told me to go to the nearest place i could find for us to talk privately.

what's worse is that this place is a love hotel.

"so," he started. he broke the awkward silence. i turn my face to where he's at. he looks around the place with his arms crossed. we made eye contact while he walked towards me. he tilts his head, "is this your way of inviting me to sleep with you?"

"no," i shook my head with a frown. "no, no."

that wasn't really what i have in mind.

he then sat down beside me. we're currently on the edge of the bed. he crossed his legs and leaned back with the help of his hands. he continues to look around the tidy bedroom.

while for me, my elbows on my knee and my head lie low. i seriously don't know what to talk about now that we're here.

i'm internally panicking because it's just me and him; on the bed, in a room.. of the hotel. (correction, love hotel.)

argh! snap out of it!

" 'you okay?" he asked because i suddenly grabbed my head in frustration. i answer without looking, "yeah, i'm fine."

i sighed to calm myself; i returned to my position earlier. this time, i looked at him. "i'm not avoiding you," his eyes kept contact with mine. "i'm not ashamed about seeing you because of," i paused to make an appropriate word, "your work." i add, "please don't misunderstand."

he raised his eyebrow. he still has the displeased look in his face. "then, why don't you wanna meet─ no," he pouted. "answer this," he pointed at my face. with furrowed eyebrows, "who's namjoon to you?"

"huh?" i frowned because of that question. i'm confused. what? why would he ask⸺ then it shot up to me. i answer quickly, "he's my colleague!"

"colleague, huh..?" he copied and averted his eyes somewhere. he swings his foot. he looks doubtful with my answer. "why it seems like you two are..."

i couldn't hear the last words he said because his voice became smaller when he finished.

what did he say?

he mumbled something.

with my questioning look, "sorry, what?"

"anyways," he changed his mood with a naughty look. his lips curved up as he eyed me, "didn't know you're quite the daring type."

"pardon?" i'm pretty much lost to what he's been saying. i just shook my head and stood up. i bow my head slightly, "i apologize for dragging you here, but let's call it a night." a friendly smile on my lips, "let's go home, shall we?"

i was about to reach for my briefcase, but he gripped my coat. when i turn my head, the big, puppy, innocent-looking eyes greeted me this time. with his small voice, "we're not gonna do it?"

my ears slowly feels warm. my eyes widened when i realized where this is going.

it's definitely 'that.'

"wh-what..?" my heart started to thump fast. i could feel it in my chest. "no," i immediately answered. with my head shaking, "no, no."

his brows furrowed and lips pouted. he let go and crossed his arms. "fine," with a bratty tone. "not like this is my first fuck, anyway. i could just find someone better to do─ ack!"

my hand just pushed him to lay in the bed. my body decided to position on top of him. i breathed out, "don't fuck with me."

the annoyance is there again.

i hate to say this, but i'm easily provoked when it comes to him. he's good at pissing me off. he's good at pushing my buttons. he's good at ruining my character. my collected nature turn upside down. it was as if i become a different person.

i remember the time back in college when i invited him to my place to hangout in my room. he's playing my hair while i'm doing my game. his soft fingers gently teasing my nape and then he sneakily reaching my cheeks. he suddenly pulled me back and made me lose my game. my anger didn't take that long to change into a shock one. his face was so close that my breath stopped.

that moment his face looked different up close. it gave me the chance to clearly see his meek-looking face. his smile is shining brightly. his eyes looked like he wanted something from me. the only thing i had in mind for that moment was to kiss him.

give my unexplainable and unexpected desire to him.

the most memorable thing was how he moaned my name. the sound he makes everytime i move, everytime i touch him. how his skin feels warm and it's warmer inside of him. his body shaking when he's close to cumming⸺

fuck! it's all coming back.

"hoseok...?" he called hesitantly with his cute frightened eyes. he reached for my cheek to caress. he has this worried look. his frowning brows are adorable, but it's just making me more irritated rather than being soft toward him.

i grab both his cheeks with one hand. my free hand unbuckles his belt and tries to remove his bottomwears. he grabs my wrist with both his hands, "hoseok, stop!"

"it's been years," i mumbled. he's squirming while i continued to undress him. my grip tightened on his cheeks and i heard him whimper. my tone is pressed, "you dare to leave me again?"

my teeth are gritted. i feel my jaw clenching. i try to make him stay to his position, but he's quite the stubborn type, so it's a struggle. i drew our face closer to make eye contact, "is this also the reason why you left?" he smacked my hand to get it off his face, but i didn't budge to let go. "i didn't fuck you like how you wanted?"

"fuck you!" he spat. he pushes my chest in desperation to escape from my grasp. this time, i grip both of his wrists. he groans shortly, "ugh, get off me!"

i force my lips to him. his legs are now moving around. "mmph!" he struggles in-between our lips. he tried to get away, but i won't let him. "sto─ mmrngh!" i took the chance to put my tongue in. not shortly after, he bit it.

"ow!" i yelped as i pulled away. i hiss in pain when i try to touch my tongue using my fingers and then lick around my mouth. i snicker, "hah, you've done it, yoongi."

he glared at me while he silently huffs. in feisty tone, "done what?"

my vision darkening.

i feel my head heating up, i assume it's going to be a headache.

"i'm going to fuck─" i aggressively pulled his shirt to have his face come closer to mine. i threaten, "─the whore out of you and let you know that no one can please you like i do." i add, "your cries and pleas will be ignored."