Unforgotten Words • Jenlisa ✔

Fear

It's strange how fear can become an unwanted intruder, manipulating our lives like puppets on a dark stage.

I don't want to know who we are without each other.

Sometimes I wonder if this is fair or just the cruel fate playing with us, testing our limits, our courage to face what we truly are. Of course, it's that.

It hurts just the same.

This fear, this constant dread of being discovered, it tears at my heart as ruthlessly as a sharp blade. And yet, I can't pull away.

Day after day, week after week, we're trapped in an endless cycle of evasion and hiding, always keeping ourselves at arm's length, even when our hearts desperately cry out for closeness. Or finding small gaps to see each other, between unexpected schedule conflicts, tight timetables, and dark glasses.

These brief treasures we share in the shadows, dancing only by the light of the moon as a witness, when the world forgets us and we're just the two of us. It's a sweet irony, isn't it? Hiding our love as if it were a dirty secret, when in reality it's the most beautiful and pure thing I've ever known.

It will never be enough.

These crumbs of time that are granted to us, these rare moments of union that we devour with insatiable greed... they will never be enough to quench the voracious hunger that burns within us.

Because you and I have to hide ourselves from the outside, where the world watches us with judgmental eyes, where I can't be yours and you can't be mine. 

And I'm afraid. Terrified.

And fear is another word that sticks to the skin and lodges under the heart of every human being at some point in life, and it does everything it can to not let go. Soon it, the only feeling we'd like to get rid of.

But it's a mechanism of defense and protection. A tool that sometimes saves us. I'm sure it's what's saving us right now, because it's what keeps me from saying screw it to everything and going after her.

So what if people talk?

What if half of the world still doesn't agree? 

What do we have to do with them?

 It's not up to them to choose. 

It's up to us.

Every piece of you fits perfectly, every second, every thought. It's as if we were pieces of a puzzle, meant to be together, but condemned to remain apart.

And even though my heart silently weeps for your absence, I will never show it. 

Not because I don't feel enough, but because people don't deserve my raw side, the permission to see me break if I show everything of myself including you.

They can't and won't touch you.

Because I've said it once and I'll say it again: I don't want to live love like this. 

I don't want to hide us.

But fear... fear keeps us prisoners of a distorted reality, where love is seen as a weakness, where we're forced to deny who we are for the sake of superficial acceptance.

But in the end, love always finds a way to overcome even the deepest fears.

And as long as there's a glimmer of hope, I'll be here, waiting for the day when I can finally hold you in the street.

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