I'm just trying to understand the life of a Deadman. It's not creepy, right?
When I snapped out of it, I thought about deleting this book, but I hate giving up on things. I'd rather find some good in it.
Using the nickname "Xx" brings back a lot of bad stuff I wish I could forget. But instead of dwelling on it, I push it aside like an annoying kid.
I found out about him after he died, like Pop Smoke. I know their lives weren't great examples, but I'm interested anyway.
So let's dig in until I get bored...
Xx was young, and to me, he was cute.
The first song I heard was "Moonlight." It reminded me of the werewolf stories I love, and it was cool. The music video was almost how I imagined it. Xx seemed sad, which lots of young people are drawn to, so I paid attention, but I also felt sad he died.
Listening to an artist after they die feels different. You feel guilty, like you should've... but should've done what? It's sad in a weird way.
I never paid much attention to people of my own race; I was always interested in Americans, especially the fair-skinned ones. (It's funny how they're not as fair as Asians but proudly call themselves white) *such is life.
Apart from my family, the rich, and a few friends, I never really cared about my race. It's just how I think.
One day, I realized there are attractive people in my race. At one point, I felt like I was racist. Call it whatever; I'm just writing my thoughts.
After listening to a few of his songs, I felt torn. I don't usually swear, and he did in his music, but it was still good with a message. I kept listening, feeling sadder as I remembered he's gone.
Then his motivational stuff caught my attention. It made me think if I could learn something from a dead person...
D.a.n.i.e.l.l.a