Shadows of devotion (AHS Kai Anderson Fanfiction)

Acceptance

November 1st - 2016

I hadn't seen Kai in about a week since meeting him at the restaurant. There were a few times he texted me, and one day, he even showed up at the cafe where I worked. However, I couldn't risk interacting with him so I hid in the back room. He had too much of an effect on me, and I needed to stay strong. He occupied my thoughts and invaded my dreams frequently, and mentally, I always succumbed to his gaze. It couldn't be denied that he had taken over my desires, perhaps even that I craved him, since our night together. If I wanted to maintain control of our situation, I couldn't afford to even be in the same room with him, no matter how strong the urge.

That's why I was so hesitant when I received the invite for another sleepover with Winter. But she kept persisting and asking.
Carly had pretty much unfriended the poor girl after the incident with Kai, and Winter didn't want to spend the weekend alone.
So eventually, I agreed to her request, and when Saturday rolled around, I found myself sitting in my car in their driveway. I stared at the house in front of me, taking deep breaths to calm my racing heart.

After a long moment, I took one last inhale and grabbed my bag from the passenger seat, then stepped out of the car. My legs carried me towards the door and I let out a slow exhale before raising my hand and gently knocking my knuckles against the wood. I stood there in silence for a long moment before footsteps approached. I let my eyes fall closed, practically praying that Kai wouldn't be the one to open the door.
Luckily, when the door opened, it was Winter's face that greeted me. I smiled in relief and stepped forward to give her a small hug. Winter returned the act of affection and looked at me with a smile. "Hey. I'm glad you agreed to come." I nodded and glanced over her shoulder for any sign of the other Anderson sibling, finding none.

Winter stepped aside to allow my entrance, and I slowly accepted. The door clicked shut behind me, and I immediately made my way towards Winter’s room, avoiding the risk of running into Kai. As I passed by his room, I was relieved to find the door closed, the faint sound of some video he was watching seeping through it.
Winter followed me into her room, closing the door behind us. The two of us sat next to each other on the edge of her bed. Winter looked happy as we discussed our plans for the night. "Remember how you got drunk last time and talked about how you had a craving for brownies?"
I slowly nodded, feeling a little embarrassed by the reminder of last weekend.
Winter continued with a smile. "Well, I went out to buy brownie mix. I figured we could make some and eat them while watching movies."
I smiled at her plans and quickly agreed. "That sounds great. I need a relaxing night."
Winter tilted her head a little in confusion. "How come? Did something happen?"
I sighed and shook my head. "Not really... just class and work."
Winter nodded in understanding. "Got ya, you've always been a busy person."
I laid back with a sigh. "Ugh... tell me about it." Winter laughed and joined me in laying back on her bed. "Have you ever thought about quitting one of your jobs?"
I turned my head to look at her, confused by the thought. "What?"
"Well, you got a scholarship after that whole online comic thing, your house is paid for, and you make good money from both of your jobs. Plus, I'm sure you have a lot saved up from working all these years." "Huh..."

I turned my gaze back up to the ceiling and pondered her words. She wasn't entirely wrong. I obviously had bills to pay, along with expenses for food and other necessities, but I did have a substantial amount of money saved up. I had been working at the cafe since I was 18, along with other jobs I could find. I had contemplated quitting one of them to focus more on school or my personal life. (I hadn't had time to date since high school.) But every time I considered it, I chickened out, fearing that anything could happen and I shouldn't become too confident. After all, there's no such thing as being too prepared or having too much money.