You'll Always Have My Shoulder When You Cry

Nightmares

3rd person POV

'Daddy. Please' An eight-year-old Alessio begged his father. He was hurting him. There was blood. So much blood. He never cared he continued to take his knife and carve out parts of his skin. Alessio remembered his father made him stay there for hours. The body was disgusting. His father came in and he was angry. 

"YOU!" His father snarled. His father clenched his fist and before—

Alessio jolted awake, drenched in sweat, his heart racing like it wanted to sprint right out of his chest. He cursed under his breath, trying to catch his breath and shake off the nightmare. His forehead was slick with sweat, and he wiped it away with the back of his hand. He was so engrossed in trying to inhale and exhale he never saw Luca staring at him from the bed with his big brown doe eyes that are identical to Alessio's

Luca knew Alessio was having a nightmare but he wondered why. His mother said that only weak people get nightmares. Luca also knew that Alessio was not weak. Many people used to take turns hitting him and the ones that would hurt the most always had very big arms and Alessio had very very very big arms. 

Alessio was on the couch and when turned around he saw Luca. Alessio was terrified when he woke up from his nightmare and Luca was staring at him which caught him off guard.

"Luca? What are you—" He stopped when he saw how petrified Luca was. Luca thought that Alessio was mad at him for staring.

"Luca I'm not mad okay? I was just shocked. Can't sleep?"

Luca shook his head. He didn't know what to do or say. Everything was new to him. Alessio wanted him to eat and not get hurt. Luca liked being around Alessiobut it was very confusing. Alessio kept giving him options!

"Nightmares?" Luca nodded shamefully. His mother thought him having nightmares is weak. That he was weak and pathetic. 

"Hey, Luca," Alessio said softly. "You know those scary dreams you've been having? They're not a sign of weakness, okay? They're actually your brain's way of working through stuff that's happened to you. Like, when something's bothering you, your brain tries to make sense of it, and sometimes that can come out as nightmares. It's not just you; it happens to everyone from time to time, even me."

Luca never fully understood it but he was too afraid to ask questions so he just nodded. He knew no matter what he would always be weak.

'Fuck this shit' Alessio thought. He got up from the couch and put his hoodie on and grabbed an extra hoodie for Luca. He was in no mood to pretend to be happy. Luca saw Alessio's mood change when he got up. Luca thought Alessio was going to hit him and flinched. 

'Great my own son's afraid of me and it's all my fault because I couldn't protect him from Emily. He shouldn't stay with me he would have a better life without me. I can barely take care of myself let alone a kid'

"Here," Alessio said quietly. "I know it's not much, but it might help keep you warm. Don't worry I won't hurt you" 'Again' he thought

Luca gently took the hoodie in his trembling hands. He nodded. Alessio's heart ached he had caused Luca to fear him. 

This was all my fault. Every scar on Luca's body is because he's related to me.

Alessio crouched down to Luca's eye level. "I promise, Luca," he murmured. "I'll never hurt you. You're safe with me, okay? "

Luca reluctantly nodded.

"So...neither of us can sleep obviously so if you want we can go outside and watch the sea and stars. When I get nightmares, Sandro—My brother—used to always take me outside to calm me down and it used to make me feel better. Do you want to try it?" 

Luca this time looked straight at Alessio and nodded enthusiastically and for the first time, Alessio saw Luca was smiling. Alessio for the life of him couldn't figure out why Luca was smiling but seeing him smile made Alessio smile this time it was genuine 

"Alright then, let's go," Alessio said smiling still wondering why Luca was so excited.

Luca was so happy he couldn't stop smiling. For the first time in his life, someone cared about him. Alessio wanted Luca to feel better and Luca completely forgot about his nightmare already but he didn't want to tell Alessio that as selfish as it sounds Luca wanted to spend time with Alessio.

"But first we're going to need to put on your hoodie. It's cold outside" 

Luca nodded eagerly, his smile widening even further as he slipped on the hoodie Alessio had given him. He did it by himself and so quickly that it made Alessio chuckle. Luca thought Alessio had a nice laugh and he felt happy that he made Alessio smile and laugh so he was smiling a lot more which left Alessio looking very confused. 

Alessio remembered Matts's warning on Luca only walking for a limited time and mentally cursed himself

"Luca I'm going to have to carry you because of your ribs but if your uncom—" Luca nodded and Alessio was shocked at how quickly he agreed 

Alessio gently, scooped Luca up, being mindful of his ribs. It was the first time he held him like this, and the weight of it all hit him hard.

For Luca, it was weird yet oddly comforting to be carried like this. No one had ever lifted him so gently before and it made Luca flush with embarrassment. Luca thought Alessio would make fun of him but...he didn't 

As Alessio cradled him. Luca was scared that Alessio might hurt him but he also liked the way Alessio held him.

They stepped out of the house. Luca shivered slightly but didn't mind. He was too excited about spending time with Alessio. Alessio noticed Luca shivering and he grabbed a blanket and handed it to Luca. Luca tilted his head.

"You look cute when you do that" Alessio blurted out. Luca didn't know what he did but he still blushed and buried his head in Alessios chest

One thing about Alessio is he hates physical touch. He was fine when Matt gave him a half hug or when he had a nightmare and would run to Sandro and cry all night while Sandro hugged him. But not his chest never his chest that's where his father used to have his 'fun' with Alessio. Alessio's arms tightened instinctively around Luca.

 'Luca is different' he reminded himself.

 They passed the garden which they had gone before and Luca thought that this was where they were going.

"We're not going there we're going somewhere special" Luca smiled even more but Alessio never saw it as he was carrying Luca and Luca still didn't want to make eye contact. Luca smiled because Alessio wanted  to take him somewhere special and that made him feel wanted