𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚍𝚘𝚗'𝚝 𝚛𝚎𝚊𝚕𝚕𝚢 𝚌𝚊𝚛𝚎 // 𝚖𝚒𝚗𝚜𝚞𝚗𝚐

I will care.

⋆｡‧˚ʚ♡ɞ˚‧｡⋆

I sighed heavily and wondered where to start this whole mess.

"Okay... I- I think I'm ready."

He gave me a cold expression but I could sense the slight worry and anticipation in his eyes. His eyes are the most beautiful ones I've ever seen.

"It all started like two years ago, I think. Just the start of highschool or something like that. My mother started being. Weird.
She would always ask me who I was with and whenever I said a boy's name she would make a disgusted face. At first I didn't pay much attention to it but later she started making rude remarks.. mostly towards you-"

"Like what?" he asked.

"Do you really wanna know?" I sighed when the boy next to me nodded.

"Well uh- she would call you all types of slurs and just curse at you- I don't wanna get into details." I shifted on my swing and continued the story.

"It's been like that for a whole year until the end of my junior year - the end of your sophomore - she yelled at me and slapped me for wanting to hang out with you. It was the day I called.. and well.. Yeah." My voice broke at the end when I had to recall the memories of my mother insulting someone I love and slapping her own son for it.

"She did what?" he asked in disbelief.

"Um- she insulted you--"

"No what did she do to you?"

"Um she hit me?-"

"What a bitch.." I heard him mutter and I chuckled nervously.

"Yeah.. anyways-- you remember my dad?"

"Of course I do! He's a kind man." I saw his eyes sparkle at the mention of the old man. Sure my dad was way better than my mother.

"Yeah... She divorced him and married some gold digger that came from America. Honestly I hate him." I saw a  shocked expression on his face.

"To top it all she took my phone for the whole summer and the first month of my senior year so I wasn't even able to call me real dad. I really really miss him and I wish I could've been with him right now. Even if it means I would have to move out to a way smaller house or something-"

"That's fucked up." he scoffed.

"Yeah.. it is. And I regret everything I did when I was feeling so down, because of her I lost a lot. I tried to be on top of my class at all times so I could make her proud but it just resulted in her beating me up whenever I got a lower grade."

Not knowing what to respond - I assume - Han didn't say anything. He was just sitting there and staring at me.

"You regret things?" the boy asked after a good while.

"Yeah... I really fucking do. I lost you, I lost my fater and my mother.. my sister barely talks to me and when she does she asks for a lift or something." a tear slipped from my eye, I didn't even notice  and decided to ignore the quiet sobs I let out.

"Do you want to fix... things?.." he asked unsure.

I thought for a moment before replying. I would love to start over with my dad, friends and most specifically with Jisung.

"I do."

"Will you even care?"

"Huh?" I was confused. His statement came out pretty suddenly.

"Will you care when you fix things?"

"Jisun- uhm. Han. Of course. You might not know but I've never stopped caring about you. I know that I've been a dick and what I did was purely stupid and I have no excuses for what I did but-- I truly never stopped caring for you. Heck I even searched the whole school to find you but- you weren't there. Guess I deserved that."

"Than why didn't you call or even text me?" he asked clearly a little annoyed but more concerned.

"As you know I got my phone taken away and instead of getting it back as it was my mother restarted it. I had no contacts or photos. I would have called if I knew your number but I knew you were getting a new phone on your birthday--"

"How the heck did you know?" he asked surprised and I chuckled.

"Your parents asked me what you would want to get and I told them that your phone has been annoying you- I was going to give you some accesories for it for your birthday. I still have them!!" I exclaimed remembering how Jisung's parents met up with me to ask about what he would want- he was always a quiet kid not complaining much.

"Oh..."

An awkward silence filled the air, neither knowing what to say next.

We sat like this for almost 15 minutes when I finally gathered enough courage to ask.

"Han Jisung will you start over with me - as friends - so I can fix everything?

I promise, I will care."

The END.

~~

Gosh this is so messy but I can't write it in a better way.

There's going to be a second book so don't worry!!

Anyways any thoughts?? Are there any parts that you would change?

I don't know if I like this story fully buuut- yeah.