Haunted | Daryl Dixon

43. Not Him

Evelyn sat, her arms crossed tightly over her chest, leaned back in the empty pew. She had taken it upon herself to sit away from the others, knowing that she was yet to completely cool down after the incident on the Hilltop the day before.

While none of them questioned her silent choice to sit by herself, she did receive some concerned looks from the others, especially Daryl, who hadn't ripped his eyes away from burning a hole in the side of her head until Rick had begun speaking.

She hadn't spoken to anyone on the ride back in the RV from the other community, and had only broken her silence when Finn had approached the freshly returned group. She had opted to steer the young boy away to chat with him silently, making the choice not to bring up Negan.

Sure, the boy had known the man before the outbreak, but he had known him as Mr. Smith. And there was no need to worry the boy if it wasn't even him in the first place.

The decision was also made not to return to her house that night, not wanting to have to face Daniel or Daryl. Instead, she slept on the couch in the living room of the home Finn was staying in. At least, she tried to sleep.

Not a wink of it came to her, though, not when her mind was racing at a thousand miles a second. She had almost gotten sick again.

People from both Evelyn's group and the Alexandria community sat scattered throughout the church building, eyes all glued to the front as Rick addressed them, "And we can work with the Hilltop." He continued, "Maggie hammered out a deal. We're getting food- eggs, butter, fresh vegetables. But they're not just giving it away. These Saviors, they almost killed Sasha, Daryl, and Abraham on the road."

The woman's eyes shot down, she couldn't believe that Daryl had failed to mention it to her. Actually, she could believe it. If the roles had been reversed, she wouldn't have wanted to worry him for no reason.

"Now, sooner or later, they would've found us," Grimes kept speaking, "Just like the Wolves did, just like Jesus did. They would've killed someone or some of us. And then they would try to own us."

Evelyn's jaw was clenched and her lips were pressed in a thin line. Her eyes subconsciously floated to the side, only to see Daniel already looking at her intently. She quickly averted her gaze back to the font.

"And we would try to stop them. But by then, in that kind of fight, low on food, we could lose. This is the only way to be sure, as sure as we can get, that we win. And we have to win." He paused, "We do this for the Hilltop, it's how we keep this place. It's how we feed this place."

Her eyes caught onto Jesus, who was standing by Rick's side. He caught onto her gaze, tilting his head to the side slightly, a contemplative look on his features.

"This needs to be a group decision. If anybody objects, here's your chance to say your piece."

She bit down on her lip. This could be the moment. The moment she speaks up, voicing her concerns over the name, explaining to them why she went bat-shit.

If it was Negan- the Negan she knew- then they would have the upper hand.

But it couldn't be. The things they had described- the things that man had done- did not describe the man she had known.

The man who had looked out for her- a stranger- because she was getting too drunk at a party. The man that had pulled her out of the darkest place she had ever been in her life. The man who had been the most beloved gym teacher at the school they worked at. The man that helped find Finn a better home.

So, she didn't speak up. She didn't say anything. Because her voice in the matter would just be a shot in the dark- a false piece of information. Because it wasn't Negan. It wasn't.