Choices We Cant Make

38: the wedding p2

Violet POV

Have you ever felt like the entire world around you just bursted into oblivion? That you remain, in a state of constant grief, knowing that it was you who afflicted pain towards an otherwise happy family.

Jack died. He killed himself- why? Non of us know yet. Aunt Arma is very tense, she can not even look at Jack's lifeless body which lays on his bed. The entire apartment is swarmed by police officers and health care workers. Sam is here as well. He is lifeless too- but unlike Jack, his heart is very much beating.

Me and Blue are quiet. I have never seen Blue so stressed out. The second since Aunt Arma broke the news on us- the both of us have been quiet. Lost in thought.

We knew the guy. I knew the guy! He loved his brother, he did everything he could to make sure his brother was not hurt- he talked to me numerous times trying to make me understand, but he never told me why I needed to understand.

"I can only imagine the pain Sam is going through right now" Blue breaks the concentrated silence between us. Sitting across the kitchen table he continues

"He lost the one brother he was upset with"

He did and that was because of me.

Blue notices my shift in demeanor. He comes out of his seat and hugs me. He hugs me tightly and caresses my swollen cheeks. And just with that comfort- my vulnerability shines as I cry.

I cry. Was Jack depressed? Was he in some sort of financial trouble? Were bad guys behind him? Why?

I remain stranded by Blue's hug- him refusing to let me go. My eyes meet Sam's- his eyes show no emotion. He is simply dead in his head. I want to go and hug him and tell him that everything will be okay, but Blue is holding me.

He lets go. Blue lets go and nods his head in approval. As if he completely understood what my thoughts were at. I guess he did. I get up from his hug and walk to the corner of the room- where Sam is crouched.

"Sam." Is all I have to say for him to get up and pull me into his arms. Sam embraces me- not in a way that he wants me, but in a way that he needs me to just be there with him the way he has all these years. Sam finally cries with his tears damening my head. Sam does not let go and I do not even bother to ask him to- he needs this.

This affection from someone he has loved, even though she may not be his anymore. I can feel the pain and grief from his body.

An officer interrupts us- I shift my gaze once to Blue who looks at me and smiles. Not even a speck of jealousy surmounts him, and knowing that is enough for me.

"Ma'am we will need to ask some questions" the officer informs. I oblige and walk with him to the living room. Along with the officer another lady stations there with her note pad and voice recorder. I comfortably adjust myself on to Jack's couch and stare at the officer as he begins to question me.

-.-

"That is it for now but we will have you come to the police station for further investigation. Thank you" the officer finishes off with me and lets me go.

The last hour was haunting. Jack's death had a lot of questions lingering about financial enquiries- which makes sense. It is noon when I finally decide to open my phone and sure enough I am swarmed by messages and missed calls and emails by people asking about my wedding.

It is then that I realize - I am supposed to get married in 5 hours. Yikes.

Aunt Arma remains seated in the kitchen counter the entire time- lost in thought. At a point she and Blue had a little chat I assume. Blue is frantically texting people until he realizes my presence in the kitchen and he comes to me.