If only you could see my heart https://archiveofourown.org/works/55134793/chapt

The Beginning

He hated him,he hated him so much it hurt his soul.Moving to madrid was a dream but then it mean't getting to see Gavi in all his glory.At some point, they will be face to face,playing against each other playing for the crown he had made up in his head.Just thinking about it made him want to throw up.What a stuck up piece of shit.Oooh,how he hated him. He cant fathom hating somebody who he has never met a day in his life before like this but here he is.He can't even remember how the hate started,but once he was randomly watching a barca game in Germany and the kid made his debut,he just hated him.You can call it "hate at first sight" it maybe because he was younger than him playing for the team of his dreams or because he saw on twitter people already comparing them two and it made him angry.How dare they compare him to this short guy who seem to have a short fuse to him?Future of spain??what the fuck does that mean??

He is fucken Jude Bellingham,not only the future of England but the whole world.How dare they compare him to this kid??He hated him

"Hey buddy,you okay" his dad Mark asks him while sitting next to him on his bed "Being Nervous is normal you know,this is a new country,new language,new team mates...you will be okay,stop over thinking it"

Jude:"Thanks Dad,ive just been all in my head.. i wll be okay"
Mark:"Ofcourse you will,your mother will be there for you like she always does and me and Jobe are always rooting for you,remember that"
Jude:"Ooh I know" he gives his father a big hug

FIRST DAY IN MADRID
The media frenzy was a bit too much.Over the years,moving from birmingham to Dortmund and now Real Madrid he knew he was getting famous,he knew he was kinda famous,he had girls in a choke hold and the men jealous of his growing popularity.But now,standing here,with a madrid shirt in his hands,smiling next to Florentino Perez he wished the cameras would not flash as much,he wished the jornalists would not scream at him to "Smile wide" he just wished he was like a "third choice goalkeeper" of any team who nobody knows but is still as part of the team as the first choice stricker.

"Are You okay,honey" His mother asks as soon as they get back to the hotel.The first day had come and gone by and he couldnt be more greatful.To his suprise,he liked it here.He came 2 days ago before being introduced to the world as the number 5 of real madrid and he already loved the weather,the food and his team mates.When he was greating Vinicius he said "Its sunny,innit" and the boy just died with laughter and he knew he got the reference, this was gonna be his bestfriend here.
Jude:"Iam Okay Mom,just tired,Jobe and dad have gone to the min golf course and i just want to sleep"
Denise:"Well,you should have gone with them you know,maybe you could meet a cute guy there..."
Jude"Moooooom..." Jude shouted for her to stop.

Ever since he came out to his parents as bisexual when he was 17 they been trying to see him date a guy ever since,always thinking a "guy is cute" he knows its their way of coping and accepting his sexual orientation but it becomes too much sometimes.Especially on days like this when he is exhausted and Lonely.Not the typa lonely of being alone because his friends and family are always present in his life,But the lonely of wanting to be in Love with somebody.To share the good and the bad,cuddle the whole day and fuck the whole night.Damn,he was Lonely.He broke up with his girlfriend after she said "Gavi was cute" and that made him angry.In his head,that was like her comparing the two of them,he was handsome and Gavi was cute.She didnt know this but it stuck in his head for weeks that he had to make a dumb excuse of having to end their relationship because he was moving to spain.

That night as he went to sleep,he thought to himself "Gavi really is cute" he almost chocked on his saliva when that thought passed his mind because what the hell was that??

He gets up from bed and takes his phone,He goes on instagram and searches "Gavi" He was curious.Also the old saying says "Keep you Friends close and your enemies closer" this is all it was.Trying to see what the competition is up to.Ignoring the fact that the whole "Let me go on instagram to see what Gavi is doing" came about because a very evil thought just passed by whispering "Gavi Is cute".

That night as he goes to sleep,he convinces himself that Gavi isnt all that cute.His instagram is all about his childhood team,and his family.All it did was make him look human,but he knew he hated him still Maybe hate was a bit extreme but still,he just didnt like the kid.He hopes and pray that the Elclassico thats scheduled for 2 weeks to come dont end up with him getting a red card because of that little cunt.He hits his head on the pillow and is floating in his dream immidiately

On the other side of the Country,Gavi is annoyed.Annoyed at everybody he knows and Love talking about Jude Fucken Bellingham finally signing for Madrid.He didnt hate the kid,but he didnt care for him either.If he was honest,he was overrated.He had watched him play for england here and there but he wasnt moved.The guy was tall and handsome but football wise he had nothing in him and Pedri,he knew that for sure.Thats why now he was going to bed annoyed as hell at how much even his team mates on their whatsapp group are "scared" to face the new Englishman in town 2 weeks to Come.As for him,he just didnt Care.