Fame and fortune

One

"Where have you been?" I say as the light in the entry way flickers on, and I lift my head up from my phone as I sit in a chair facing the doorway. "What do you mean, I was just out with some friends." He says slurring his words. "Joe, I know that's a lie. Your friends are at home. With their wives, or girlfriends, and kids." I say.

"I was out with Emma, or was it Alison? I was out with someone." He says. "You reek." I say. "God Joe how much did you drink, a whole bottle?" I say and he shrugs. "That's half of what you drink." He says. "You act like I'm some alcoholic!" I say. "I'm going to bed." He says rubbing his temples. "Not in mine you aren't." I say. "Sleep in a guest bedroom. We'll deal with this in the morning." I say.

This was the fifth time Joe has come home drunk this week. All of his friends are with their partners, taking care of them or their kids. We don't have that. My friends either reek of marijuana or baby powder. A few years ago I had really thought about having kids with Joe, but it didn't work out. It never does. All I'm known for is being the fun aunt either all of the cats. Favorited by all of my friend's kids.  Sometimes I just crave that maternally instinct of raising a child. There were days I wished for it with all my heart but was told "We have a few more years" or "Not right now I just booked a job" or "Your music would distract us from them" all trying to convince me not to. That he didn't want that. Not with me atleast.

"Joe we've got to talk." I say as he comes downstairs, either black circles under his eyes. "We can't keep doing this. I can't keep doing this." I say. "Oh you're fine. Stop acting immature. Can't deal with a man." He says coming closer to me. "No. I can't deal with your shit. Drunk five times a week. You don't ever remember what you did, you never tell me who you did it with. God knows you've probably cheated on my multiple this week, let alone the past few months." I say. "Oh look at you being all insecure and jealous of your precious little boyfriend giving everyone else but you attention." He says.

"Im not jealous of you Joe. I'm done with you." I say and the room goes silent. "Done with what? You could never leave me. You don't have the guts to do it. Your to scared of being judged by everyone in the world to break this off. So forever you'll be stuck with me." He says kissing my neck. "Stop. Joe I mean it." I say and he kisses my mouth, wiggling his tongue trying to get access inside of my mouth. "Joe I said stop it!" I say pushing him back.

"What you can't give your boyfriend pleasure?" He says and I huff. "No wonder I slept with all of those other girls." He says. That is my last straw with him. "Get out." I say. "What?" He says. "Get our. I don't want to see you ever again. Get out of my house." I say. "Where am I supposed to go?" He says. "I don't care! I could care less where you go! I just don't want you here. You don't deserve to be here." I say. "Taylor I-." He says. "Get out!" I yell at him shoving him back. "I don't want you here leave!" I say.

"I'm not leaving." He says rolling his eyes. "Get out of my house!" I scream at him. Silence falls across the room. "Miss Swift, if everything okay." One of my security guards says. I stand there quietly for a second contemplating whether I should make the security kick him out. "No." I say. "Make him leave." I say crossing my arms. "Okay. No problem." He says walking over to Joe as another guard follows behind him. "You can't get rid of me!" Joe says as he's being forced out of my New York city apartment. "I'll be back! You always come running back to me! I'll have to take you back because no one will! No one will love you as much as I do. Never ever again! You're worthless." Joe yells as the door finally shuts.

I collapse again the kitchen cabinets. Sobbing as my butt hits the floor. No one will love me again. No one wants you. You are worthless. I choke out breaths as I recall the things Joe has just said to me. He was once was the person who loved me the most in the world, now he hates me. Everyone hates me.