Kinser: If you bite it and you die, it's poisonous. If it bites you and you die, it's venomous.
White Beach: What if it bites me and it dies!?
Kadena: Then you're poisonous. Jesus Christ, Person B, learn to listen.
Torii: What if it bites itself and I die?
Foster: That's voodoo.
Kadena: What if it bites me and someone else dies?
White Beach: That's correlation, not causation.
Torii: What if we bite each other, and neither of us die?
Foster: That's kinky.
Kinser: Oh my God.
North: Who the fuck added me to a fucking group chat?
South: >:O language
Okinawa: Yeah watch your fucking language
Japan: OKAY WHO TAUGHT OKINAWA THE FUCK WORD?
South: 'The fuck word'.
North: Are you stupid? You guys use the f word all the time
South: Oh my god he censored it
Japan: Say fuck, North.
Okinawa: Do it, North. Say fuck.
*Right before Russia and North's wedding*
Ukraine: Well I have to go, I have a wedding to attend.
Belarus: Wait... Oh! I have a wedding to attend too!
Ukraine: I THINK WE ALL HAVE WEDDINGS TO ATTEND
Kazakhstan, panicked: I THINK I HAVE A WEDDING TO OFFICIATE
Japan: You know, I'm starting to regret showing you how that blender works.
South, drinking toast: Why do you say that?
Moskva: How many kids do you have?
USSR: Biologically, emotionally, or legally?
Russia: Name a more iconic duo than my crippling fear of abandonment and my anxiety. I'll wait.
North: You and me!!!
Russia, tearing up: Okay.
Japan: Can I be frank with you guys?
North: Sure, but I don't see how changing your name is gonna help.
South: Can I still be South?
Okinawa: Shh, let Frank speak.
Okinawa, setting down a card: Ace of spades
North, pulling out an Uno card: +4
Japan, pulling out a Pokémon card: Jolteon, I choose you
South, trembling: What are we playing
Japan: *Gently taps table*
North: *Taps back*
South: What are they doing?
Okinawa: Morse code.
Japan: *Aggressively taps table*
North: *Slams hands down* YOU TAKE THAT BACK-
Random country: Have you seen a person named 'North' around here?
South: Ugh, yes. He made a horrible mess of the blood fountain.
Okinawa: It looks fine to me?
South: IT USED TO BE WATER!!!
China: What's up guys? I'm back.
Taiwan: What the- you can't be here. You're dead. I literally saw you die.
China: Death is a social construct.
Taiwan: China... Why did you draw a pentagram on the floor?
China: Your text told me to satanize the house before you returned.
Taiwan:
Taiwan: I wrote sanitize, China.
China: *Kicks the door down looking panicked*
Taiwan: What did you do?
China: Nobody died.
Taiwan: WHAT KIND OF ANSWER IS THAT?!
North: WHAT'S YOUR TYPE???
South: Anything, honestly, but nerds especially
North, desperately, as South bleeds out: YOUR BLOOD TYPE
South: Oh! B positive.
North: DONT TRY TO CHEER ME UP JUST TELL ME YOUR BLOOD TYPE
South:
South: Oh just so you know, it's very muggy outside
North:
North: South, I swear, if I step outside and all of our mugs are on the front lawn...
South: *Sips coffee from bowl*
North: Date someone who will drag you outside at 3am to look at the stars.
South: If anyone, and I mean anyone, wakes me up at 3am to go look at the damn sky they will be removed indefinitely from my life.
North: How petty can you get?
South: I once edited a Wikipedia article to win an argument I was wrong about.
North: Hey, it's your turn to wash dishes.
South: I'LL WASH THE WALLS RED WITH YOUR BLOOD.
North: 'Kay, but before that, wash the dishes, also use soap this time?
Australia: Treat spiders the way you want to be treated.
Okinawa: Killed without hesitation.
Australia: No.
Australia: I've already sent good vibes your way... they're coming. There's nothing you can do to stop them.
Okinawa: This is the most threatening way I've ever been cheered up.
Okinawa: Australia was banned from the chicken shack, so we had to go out of town to get some.
Australia: Well, they shouldn't say "all you can eat" if they don't mean it.
Okinawa: Australia, you ate a chair.
Australia: I slept for almost 12 hours but I might still be tired so lets go for 12 more just incase.
Okinawa: Australia, that's a coma.
Australia: Sounds festive.
YOU ARE READING
MTaD and TGbtS ✨️B R A I N R O T✨️
Short StorySince I'm safekeeping MTaD and TGbtS from the purge, I decided to make a one-shot book! They can be non-canonical if you request. I hope this makes up for it :)
