In Between Stars

Chapter Twenty-Nine: Side B

Walang tigil na kinalampag ko ang kwarto ni Summer gamit ang isang kamay, habang ang isang kamay naman ay walang tigil sa pag-refresh ng #ERei na hashtag sa X.

Natigil ako sa pagkatok nang sa wakas ay tumambad sa akin si Summer na sabog ang buhok nakakunot ang noo, at medyo naningikit ang mga mata. Mukhang nakatulog na siya agad at nagising dahil sa pagkatok ko.

"Anong nangyari?" ungol niya, mukhang wala pa sa ulirat.

"Mer, nag-t-trend kami ni Echo. Anong gagawin ko?" I brought my phone to her face.

Napaatras ang mukha niya sa ginawa ko. Huminga siya nang malalim at kinuha ang phone sa akin. Walang isang salita na tinalikuran niya ako at pumasok sa loob ng kwarto niya. She even switched on the light.

Sumunod ako sa kanya at umupo sa tabi niya sa kama. I was gnawing on my bottom lip as I watched her read the tweets. It was fifteen minutes later when Summer brought down the phone and looked at me with a scrunched face.

"Anong meron?" yun lang ang naging unang reaksyon niya.

"Hindi mo ba nabasa?" Sisilipin ko lang dapat ang phone ko para ma-check kung pareho kami ng nakita. "Trending kami ni Echo. Akala nila kaming dalawa tapos may nag-shi-ship sa amin."

"Nabasa ko. Are you bothered about the petty hate comments?"

Hindi ako nakasagot. I bit down on my lip.

"Yung sinasabi nilang pangit ka? Hindi kayo bagay ni Echo? Rei, you've heard worse than these," wika ni Summer na parang hindi siya makapaniwala na apektado ako sa mga 'yon. She winced as if she had an internal realization that I didn't know about. "Sorry. That was insensitive of me. Bothered ka pa rin ba sa mga sinasabi ng mga tao tungkol sa'yo?"

"No. It's not that." I shook my head. My stomach suddenly felt like it's being twisted into knots.

"Dahil ba shini-ship ka kay Echo? Hindi ka komportable?"

"Medyo," sagot ko, pero pakiramdam ko ay hindi pa rin 'yon ang tamang sagot.

Summer stared at me for a while, as if she was trying to read through me. She looked at the phone again and scrolled through it. She heavily sighed.

"Is it because Zeno is getting tagged and people are mentioning him?" she asked. Her third diagnosis and I heard something struck inside me. It was a bull's eye.

Deep inside, I knew exactly what was bothering me. Nakailang therapy session na ako pero ang hirap pa rin talagang umamin sa sarili. It was easier to have someone else point out exactly what I was feeling.

Hindi ako nasakagot at sapat na ang katahamikan ko bilang sagot para sa kanya.

"Worried ka na makita ni Zeno yung mga tweets?" pagpunto niya. Hindi pa rin ako nakasagot. "Ano ngayon sa'yo kung makita ni Zeno?"

I guiltily avoided Summer's prying eyes. "Baka lang kasi kung anong maisip niya."

Summer snorted. "Na baka may something nga kayo ni Echo? Ano ngayon yung yun ang maisip niya?" She paused before asking, "Has he tried to reach out to you?"

"Hindi." Malungkot akong umiling.

"You finally reached out to him, and he didn't reply?"

"Lalong hindi!" Mas agaran ang pagtanggi ko.

"Ayun naman pala. Then it doesn't matter if he sees it or not. Wala namang kayo. At mas lalong walang something sa inyo ngayon." She flippantly shrugged and handed me my phone.

I felt a crack inside my chest as I stared at my phone. I weakly took my phone and stared intently on it. She was right, of course. It shouldn't matter if he sees it or not. He probably doesn't care anymore. After all, I never heard from him again. He even left the country and hasn't returned since.