Behind These Bars

Chapter Sixteen

Chapter Sixteen
Getting into Jason's car that afternoon I felt the best I had all day. Apparently Jason had noticed my change in mood because he remarked, "Someone is in a good mood. You look like someone just told you that you never have to go to math again." I busted out laughing at his comment. " I am happy; however, if someone told me I didn't have to take math anymore I'd be a bit upset because that'd mean no more tutoring sessions with you," I remarked. Jason smirked at me, "Well it's nice to know that you value our time more than you value quitting math. Speaking of the tutoring session, can we do it at your house? My dad just got back in unexpectedly last night so I don't want to disturb him." I just shrugged my shoulders, "Yeah, that's fine with me."
Upon reaching my house, we both got out of Jason's car and walked up to my front door. Reaching under the mat, I grabbed the spare key and unlocked my door. Walking inside I turned on the hall and living room lights. As we walked, I could hear the slight echo of emptiness throughout the house. This time though, it didn't really bother me.
Setting my stuff down on the couch, I went into the kitchen and asked, "Do you want anything to drink?" Jason stopped looking around and looked at me and replied, " A water is fine thanks. Nice house by the way." I reached into the fridge and grabbed two waters. Shutting the door, I turned around and tossed one to Jason who caught it with ease.
Jason walked into the kitchen as I grabbed a granola bar from the cabinet opposite the fridge. "Is this what she left you," he asked. Turning around to Jason I realized what he was talking about, "Yeah. That was all she wrote as they say." Jason's jaw clenched, "She doesn't even say where she's going or when she will be back for gosh sakes." I just laughed humorously, "I'm used to it by now honestly." Jason looked at me sharply with his piercing eyes as he said, "How many time has she done this?" I looked to my feet and shrugged as I replied, "Four or five I guess. The first time when she just left, I was nine."
I didn't see Jason's feet move toward me until I felt his arm around me. That was when I began to cry. In that moment, I realized acceptance was a fickle thing. I realized that you can't accept something until you grieve about it so I grieved for nine year old me who was so afraid her mom was dead. I grieved for all the years I lost where I wasn't able to just be a kid and I grieved for my time in juvie where I didn't receive a single letter from my mom. After I had grieved for all the sorrows in my short life, I leaned away from Jason's chest.
Jason looked down at me and wiped my tears away with his hands. "I'm so sorry Evangeline. No kid should have to go through that-this. Especially not you," he said sympathetically. I shut my eyes and leaned into his hand. " I honestly don't blame her for leaving at times," I said. Jason shockingly asked, "What! Why would you say that? She's your mom. She shouldn't just leave you when she feels like it." I leaned my head back into Jason's chest and softly responded, "Let me tell you a story."
"My mother, Noella Lafayette, was born in France to teenage parents who considered her a gift at the time. When Noella was about two, her dad left her and her mom. My grandmother turned to drugs and often left my mom alone. When my mom was sixteen, she got in trouble with the law and she was arrested. Wanting to get away from her life, my mom took what money she had and flew here to America where she got a cheap apartment. Two years later she gets pregnant with me by some guy she's only met twice and then she turns to rich men for money. So don't you see, Noella has only known destruction in her life. That's what she does; she destroys the people around her, just like me."
At this point, Jason was holding me tighter than ever. My head was over his heart and I could hear it's rhythmic pattern beating over and over again. "You aren't destructive Evangeline. In a world full of empty people, you are the only one who shines bright," he said. I hoped Jason couldn't feel my heartbeat because it was going crazy at his words.
" I don't really feel like studying today," I said. Jason looked down at me, "Me neither. What about a movie?" I smiled up at him. "A movie sounds great. C'mon," I responded. Heading towards the living room, I sat down on the couch as Jason put in a movie. I asked, "What are we watching?" He just shrugged his shoulders, "I'll guess you'll just have to wait and see."
Jason came and sat beside me on the couch and put his arm around me as I laid my head on his chest. As soon as the opening credits came on, I knew instantly what movie we were watching. " I love Anastasia. It's one of my favorites," I said. " I know. I've heard you talk about it," Jason replied. " My feelings for this boy seem to grow every time he opens his mouth.
From that point on we were quietly watching the movie. It wasn't until the halfway point that I spoke up again, "Isn't it funny that a cartoon expresses everyday real life? Just like Dimitri, we all to some extent project this inaccurate appearance and personality. We are all like one-sided mirrors in a way. We leave outsiders in the dark so that only we can see what's going on." I felt Jason tense up at my last comment but it was only for a second before he relaxed again and said, "This is why you're good at English and I'm not." I just laughed and went back to watching the movie.
By the time the movie was over, it was nine o'clock and I was half asleep so when Jason made a move to get up I noticed. "Where are you going?" " I need to probably start heading home," he said. I looked up at his face as he moved my hair away from mu face and behind my ear.
I pleaded, "Stay, please. Just until I go to sleep then you can leave. I just hate being in this house alone." Jason looked at me and sighed. He then smiled and said, "Okay, I'll stay. Go back to sleep." I yawned and snuggled back into his chest as I drifted back to sleep.
At one point I felt myself being lifted and then placed down on something soft. I felt a kiss being placed on my forehead and then a door closing. That was all I remembered as I drifted back to sleep.
The next morning I woke up to my alarm clock. Realizing that I was in my bed in my room, I was a bit confused until a light bulb went off and I remembered that Jason had carried me up here last night. Blushing at my realization, I went to turn off my alarm when I saw a note. Picking it up, I read the words scribbled on it, "Goodnight Sleeping Beauty. I'll see you in the morning---Jason." At that my heart must have exploded from my feelings for him.