Hawkpaw looks dumbfound at Falconblaze. Then he looks down and slowly shakes his head.
"That's impossible." he says. Falconblaze wants to believe it, but can't. Hawkpaw looks up and when Falconblaze still looks uncertain he blinks. "Then at least tell me why you think so." Falconblaze looks up to the sky as he delves back into the memory that had been haunting him for so long.
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The memory was slightly faded, but some things were clear as day. He and Mistyflight, Misty at the time, had just run away from their old den after Raven disappeared.
It was raining, and they were huddling under a bush. Unable to hunt properly, they were soaked, starving, and without a clue for what to do. Misty started to wail in despair, but Falcon knew he had to keep her quiet if they wanted to remain hidden.
"Please Misty, be quiet!" he begged. "Shadowstar will find us if you keep crying." Misty tried, she really did, but every time she opened her eyes and saw the situation they were in she couldn't keep it in. But when she closed her eyes she imagined her mothers face. The best she could do was keep her eyes in narrowed slits and shake quietly. Falcon shuffled closer to his sister's drenched fur and started grooming her like Raven used to. at the moment they were safe, but it wouldn't last long.
~~~~~~~~
Not far away from the two kits a brown, slinky she-cat was crouching next to a larger black tom with icy blue eyes. For a long time they were just watching silently, waiting for the kits to doze off.
"Now?" the she-cat asks with hungry, amber eyes. The tom shakes his head.
"Not yet Mousefang. Just wait a little longer." he meows. Mousefang hisses and shifts on her paws.
"Shadowstar! They are just kits, huddling under a bush. They won't get away!" she objects. The tom glares at her.
"Are you disobeying my order?" he growls. Mousefang opens her jaws to protest again, but then thinks better about it. Shadowstar nods and turns back to the kits. After a few more moments he gives her the all-clear signal. With a wide grin she creeps down the hill, closer and closer to were Falcon and Misty were huddling.
~~~~~~~~
Falcon just remembers seeing a quick flash of brown. But under the circumstances it was all he needed to become completely alert.
"Misty, wake up!" he urged his sleeping sister. Misty blinked open her eyes.
"Wha-?" she looks around and stands up. "Falcon, what's wrong?" she asks nervously.
"I don't know. I think I saw somebody." he whispers. Misty swallows and peers out through the branches of the bush.
"Can't see anything..." she murmurs. Falcon shrugs.
"I saw what I saw, k?" he replies. Misty glanced at him and was about to reply when an eerie cry broke the sound of rain tapping on leaves. The two kits jumped and ran out from under the bush. At the same time though, a brown she-cat leaped onto them. With a startled screech Falcon and Misty split up, running in one direction each. Mousefang grabbed for Falcon, but he darted away. Somewhere inside he knew he had to protect Misty and therefore jumped onto their enemy. He heard Mousefang yowl at him to let go of her, but the thick fur was blinding and he could barely breath. But as he clung on for his life Misty came from the other side.
After struggling hard Mousefang managed to get Falcon off and lunged for Misty. Falcon acted fast, leaping towards the brown cat and clinging to her muzzle. His front paws grabbed her ears and his belly fur covered her eyes, blinding her. As he waved his back paws for a grip he gashed Mousefang's throat. with a startled gasp at the feel of blood on his claws he let go and dropped to the ground. He looked into the surprise eyes of his attacker.
"What did you...?" she stammered, trying to breath. Falcon backed up in horror, numb with disbelief. Misty whimpered behind him.
"What's wrong with her?" she asks in a whisper. Both kits jumped as Mousefang collapsed to the ground and stopped moving
"Let's go!" Falcon meowed, and he and Misty turned and fled. As he ran, Falcon could feel the burning stare of icy blue eyes, but he never looked back.
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When Falconblaze finishes his story Hawkpaw thinks in silence. For a long time he looks at his paws, frowning, thinking. Then he looks up again.
"And why do you think this is connected to the attack?" he asks.
"Shadowstar was out for revenge! He probably wanted to kill me like I killed his daughter. He tried once more, not long after, but we got away again. He must have been humiliated. after the attack on NightClan he probably felt in control again." Falconblaze explained. Hawkpaw nods slowly, as if he understands.
"You want to hear my opinion?" he asks. Falconblaze nods.
"Of course!" he says.
"I think you are blaming it on yourself with no proof. You were shocked by the sudden attack, we all were. But because of your previous relationship with Shadowstar and his warriors you blamed it on your self to rationalize the attack. But truly, I don't think it was your fault. And nobody else is blaming you for it." Hawkpaw says.
Falconblaze thinks, letting everything his apprentice told him sink in. And slowly the heavy weight of guilt lifted from his heart. He felt more free than he had felt since the day he left NightClan. He smiles. Gently at first, but slowly developing into a grin. He nods happily.
"I think you're right. And you weren't only right, you explained it so well.. You knew exactly what to say. You were smart. And during the fight with the wolves you were brave. But before that, just by leaving NightClan behind, you were strong. Both mentally and physically. There is no doubt, you're ready." he meows. Hawkpaw looks at him, clearly confused. Falconblaze laughs.
"Give yourself a quick groom and come sit underneath the tree by our nest. No sloppy work now." he turns and climbs the tree. "Go on." he insists. With a final glance Hawkpaw starts to groom his coat thoroughly, then comes and sits down like asked.
"So? What's the big deal?" he asks curiously. Falconblaze raises his tail for silence.
"Remember I told you there was no doubt?" he asks. Hawkpaw nods. "Well, what I meant is that it is time for you to receive your warrior name. Hawkpaw stares at his mentor with shining eyes.
"R-really?" he gasps Falconblaze nods.
"Really." he draws in a long breath of fresh air, then begins the ceremony.
"I, Falconblaze, mentor of Hawkpaw, call upon my warrior ancestors to look down on this apprentice. He has trained hard to understand the ways of a noble rogue, and I commend him to you as a warrior in his turn." he looks down proudly at his nephew and apprentice. "Hawkpaw, do you promise to remember what I have taught you and live nobly for the rest of your life?" he asks.
"I do." Hawkpaw meows confidently.
"Then I give you your warrior name." in one leap Falconblaze was down from the tree and padded over to Hawkpaw. "From this moment on, you shall be known as Hawkspirit. StarClan honors your bravery and wisdom, and I welcome you as a fully trained cat." he gently rests his muzzle on Hawkspirit's head. Hawkspirit licks Falconblaze's shoulder in return.
"I'm proud of you Hawkspirit. You have done well. Really well." Falconblaze purrs.
"Yeah. I think so too." Hawkspirit purred back.
