Let Me Save Your Heart.

Let Me Save Your Heart - Part 2.

Once I hit my bedroom, I immediately sunk down behind my door and let the tears fall down my cheeks.

Every single tear representing the pain and hurt which I was feeling right now. Reminding me of how unfair my life was and just how much of a disappointment I was right now. Demonstrating that I was always going to be the person that no one loved or wanted.

This was never the life that I wanted.

I always thought I was going to stay at school until I was 18 and then disappear off to University for three years, before getting the job of my dreams.

But I threw all that away for the sake of revenge on my parents for making me suffer and not letting me have some fun in my life.

And now I'm stuck with this life and I'm never going to be good enough for anyone now.

No one is going to love a 17 year old single parent and no one is going to want anything to do with me. I'm going to spend the rest of my life alone, wondering what the hell I did wrong with my life.

I might even end up living with my 27 cats. I could be known as the mad cat woman that has no friends or life.

That would be great.

I could live with that and never complain. Especially since I was the one that had got myself into this position in the first place, there was no one I could blame other than myself.

"Nikki, are you alright?" I heard my brother asking through the door, knocking softly at the same time. He was the only person in my family who actually gave a damn about me and cared if I was alright.

I could die tomorrow and none of them would really care.

"Yeah. I'm fine thanks Max!" I replied.

"You don't sound it..."

"There's nothing I haven't been through already. I'm used to all this..." I muttered.

"What do you mean? I thought things were getting better between you, mum and dad?" he asked, confusion in his voice because I had told him that everything between us was getting better, not that it was getting worse.

I did feel bad lying to him, but he didn't need to know the truth. It would just make him hate our parents, and that wasn't fair on them.

Even if they did treat me like I was nothing.

"I lied to you Max. I didn't want you to worry about me and I didn't want to make you pick between me and our parents..." I muttered, not really wanting to tell hyim anymore but I knew the truth was going to come out today and Max was going to hate me more than anything.

"Nik, you're my sister. If you wanted help, then you should just have asked me and I would have helped you." he replied. He didn't sound angry or annoyed, he sounded calm and like he wanted to help me.

I guess that's what having a older a brother is for.

"Look, you want thte truth?"

"Of course I want the truth. I've been worried about you recently, but you don't want to let me into your life. You would rather suffer in silence that let me help you..." Max sighed; I could tell that he was hurt as he spoke each of the words that he did. It made me feel even worse about not telling him the truth and keeping it to myself. But that is just how I delt with things.

I didn't bother telling people the truth because there was no point in bringing everyone else down, just because I wasn't happy with my life and what was happening.

I got myself into this mess.

I can't expect other people to bail me out of it.

"Everything..." I pretty whispered.