Let's Go! (Assassination Classroom Fanfic) (EDITING)

12. L and R time and the 'new' start

I trudged back to school the next day, determined to return to the me when I had just came to this classroom. If it was a normal class, maybe I won't have to go to such an extent. However, here in our assassination classroom where all kinds of danger might happen, I can't let myself go on like I used to. That is the conclusion I came upon yesterday night. Too many times, have I been protected in dangerous situations by my classmates. When Kanzaki-san was kidnapped, in the back alley when Karma fought for me... if this continues, I'm putting them in danger, and history will repeat itself again. I cannot let them close, or feel anything for me. I need them to put themselves and the others first in any situation that might put us in danger.

I greeted everyone with a simple hello as I entered the classroom, and walked towards my seat. Not surprisingly, after the proprietors who made Ritsu came in last night, she returned to being the Autonomously Thinking Fixed Artillery. After all, she's just a machine without her own will and emotions, only behaving as what her program tells her to do. I spot a few others coming into the classroom, Karma lagging behind them.

As he sat down, taking in my unusually composed figure and distant look on my face, he tilted his head in a silent question. When I didn't answer, he smirked. "It was a pleasant trip yesterday wasn't it? Should I carry you back home again today?" Karma teased.

"No." I replied politely, but coldly. Slightly confused at my response, the redhead stayed silent for a moment. He probably expected me to lunge at him and tell him to shut up. The corner of my mouth tilted upwards in a small, nearly indecipherable smile, forlorn and defeated. I can't let him protect me again, whatever the reasons were for him to have done so before.

Yesterday, after his act as a kidnapper and the awkward trip home, I realized after endless thinking that he was probably trying to protect me. With that and the other memories of him blocking or standing up for me, I got unconsciously tangled up in memories of the past. The long gone past when I was with my 'happy' family. If only they didn't try to protect me, if only I haven't done what I have, things wouldn't have ended the way they are today. That was my fault, and I can't let the injuries of someone else in this class I have come to treasure be my fault again. If I told them outright, it would only provoke sympathy. The only way I can think of is to go back to the cold girl I was, before everything stripped my shield down. If they think I don't care about them, then they won't care about me, and they won't get hurt because of me, but I can protect them, right?

"Leiko. Leiko-san?" Nagisa looks at me worriedly, taking in my unusual coldness towards Karma.

"Hai?"

"Umm, you know..." Before the blue haired boy could finish his sentence, a text book whack me over the head.

"Hey Leiko~" Rio chirped. "At least pay attention to your surroundings! Ritsu overcame her masters and kept her programmes! She's really not a machine!"

"Oh? That's great!" I reply with some excitement as I look at Ritsu, smiling. But I can't be too friendly, eh? I resume staring at the front of the classroom. Maybe this task I gave myself is too hard...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I stare at the vanilla ice cream topped with strawberries in front of me, my mind not really focusing on anything.

A few days ago Lovro had came to our class, and wanted to get Bitch-sensei to leave. He believed she was not suited for this assassination. I was kind of happy, to be able to not be in the same place as my father-Ayame Akihiro's murderer. Though at the same time, I have to admit, I don't exactly hold a grudge against her much, and it'd be a little disappointing to see her leave.

In the end, Korosensei made the two have a competition to see who can kill Karasuma-sensei first, of course, not literally. They had to use rubber anti-sensei knives, and they had that whole day.

Even though a little part of me didn't want Bitch-sensei to leave, I was quite surprised when Lovro failed, knowing how strong he was. And that just proves Karasuma sensei to be inhuman in power. However, I was also surprised when Bitch-sensei won with a clever trap, since she was so full of lame ideas before.

"Leiko-chan?" Kayano ask worriedly. "Are you alright?"

"Hmm?" I jerk my head up at her voice, "Yea-yeah. I'm fine." I smile at her.

"Don't be absurd, Aya-chan." Rio flicks my forehead as I look up at her. "You are clearly not fine."

"Seriously, I'm okay!" I protest, smiling a convincing smile.

Rio sighs, sitting back down. "You know why I decided to get everyone to come for dessert?"

I shake my head, then notice everyone else, Kayano, Megu, Sugino, Isogai, Nagisa, Maehara, Hinata, Fuwa, Kanzaki, look at me with eyes clearly saying 'it's about you'. "No?" I reply uncertainly.

"Baka! You're being weird!" Rio points out. "And we're worried!"

"Yeah, Leiko. Lately it's like you've been avoiding everyone." Sugino adds. "Are you alright?"

"So everyone's here because of me?" I blurt out in utter surprise before I can stop myself. Because they're worried about me? Am I really that good of a friend?

"Don't look surprised!" Megu chides. "You've been not yourself for a while, and we want to help."

But it's not something you can help with... I'm trying to distance myself so no one gets hurt because of me like Karma did. I... Can't tell them any of this. Wait. Did Rio tell them about 'that' without telling me? Is 'that' why they're persistent on helping?

I silently ask my blond friend with my eyes as I suddenly thought about it. Rio gently shook her head.

"I'm fine. Really. Sorry for troubling everyone, but I'm alright." I stand up, and after saying goodbyes, make my way out of the dessert shop.

But... To distance myself from all my friends? Am I really doing the right thing?

Just a little, I'm kind of doubting what I'm doing. But then again, I'm trying to protect them. So I have to be right, right?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Rio

After that short meeting with Leiko and everyone else, Nakamura Rio is more and more convinced that something's not right.

"Let's pray she isn't like this because of any absurd ideas she's having about protecting people, since she did blame herself for 'that'..." The usually cheerful and bubbly blonde walked away from the dessert shop serious and deep in thought.

Ayame Leiko... You better keep our promise... Rio thought as she headed home.

Author's note--

Starting from now I'm not going to apologise every single chapter that comes out, cause I'm kind of betting every single one of them will be late. Sorry guys. But this book is going to have very irregular updates.

-Raven