Release The Dark Within: My Twisted Love Story (boyxboy) (boyxgirl)

Chapter 2: Being Van Is Complicated

This one's for you Kentasty!!!  Love you ♥ ♥ ♥

I made it to Teen Fiction #431 / Romance # 519 / What's Hot # 956 the other day... this is very unusual for me because most of my stuff is rated R... so I am super excited!!

I LOVE YOU GUYS AND YOUR ALL AWESOMENESS!!

I just wanted to thank you all for the support!! Damn... check out the hotness of Van... freaking yummy!!

please enjoy!! =D this is me doing boyxboy PG 13 style... don't be disappointed though... it WILL get pervier!!

************************************************************

Chapter 2: Being Van Is Complicated

Donovan POV

I don't know why I did that this morning, brushing her hair aside and smiling at her in that way that made her stare at me like I was crazy, but she just looked so sad, helpless and annoyed that I couldn't help myself. It was just like any normal morning for the last 13 years. I'd wake her an hour earlier than necessary and give her the coffee I bought us both from Starbucks. She liked mocha lattes, while I enjoyed vanilla better. Of course this meant I was up at 5 am every school day, but I would do it gladly, time and time again, because it was for Stasi.

She seemed so tired this morning, as was I, only she was unaware that I knew exactly what she was up to this weekend. This past weekend was one of the ‘special ones’ we spent apart and it happened once every month. I didn’t know where she was off to all the other weekends, but I knew she snuck out and then back in late at night and was always really tired the following Monday morning.

She thought her secrets were safe from me and perhaps they were. But I had known her deepest, darkest secret of all, the one she'd kept buried since that day two years ago. She was right to have done so, because people, let alone her friends and our parents just wouldn't have understood.

I never let on that I knew her secret, but I comforted her in any way that I could subtly. She didn't deserve to torment herself because what she thought she was doing was wrong.

Of course it was wrong, it was completely fucked up, but I had no room to judge, because what I had done and the shit I had gotten myself dragged into was 100 times worse.

Our mom would have disowned us both if she had ever known Stasi secret, or mine for that matter, so I was thankful that she didn’t. Even though I tried so hard to hide what I buried deep within me, at least I had some way to relieve the pain, and someone who understood. That someone was my first love.

Although my first love didn't compare to my true love, I loved them both in different ways. My love, the true one was dark and forbidden and forced me to do things that went against my nature, but my love for the first only compelled me further and led me down all the wrong paths, until my mind was so completely fucked that right seemed wrong and wrong seemed right.

I was thankful that my older brother Crispin had no knowledge of who the real me actually was. He would have been so disappointed in me, as would our father if he was still alive.

Not that I remembered him, since he died just after my birth, but I knew of him and I knew that Cris and I looked just like him with dark brown hair and grey eyes. Stasi looked more like our mother, with beauty and grace, even though she had a dark sheen to her presence. Her light brown hair and green eyes were such a contrast to Crispin and I that people barely believed we were siblings.

We were, we just had different fathers since our mother was so distraught after Cris and my dad’s death, that she got drunk and slept with his best friend when I was only six weeks old. Stasi was born almost 9 months later, making our age difference only ten months.