Don't Let Me Fall

Seven

Seven:: Paisley

"And everyday I'm learning about you

The things that no one else sees and the end comes too soon like dreaming of angels"

The Xx-Angels

The moon creeped through the windows in the living room as Ryan and I sat on the living room floor, smiles on our faces as we had deep conversations. Ryan seemed a little more light hearted and as if the world was lifted off his shoulders just of the thought of someone listening and not trying to change his views on the subject.

I wonder if Emily ever saw him like this. Guaranteed she had, the way the moon accented his handsome features and reflected off of his white teeth. She probably noticed how his sun kissed skin looked so soft in the moonlight. I always the loved night time, I felt like that's when you truly got to know a person. I felt like I came to love it more just experiencing it with Ryan.

Ryan aroused feelings in me that I had been begging my heart not to feel. He was taken and regardless of the stresses of his relationship, we couldn't be anything. I couldn't allow my stupid heart to love yet another thing it couldn't have. I hated when he smiled at me, it made my knees weak, but yet I loved it because it caused my lips to split in a grin as well.

"I want to feel comfortable enough with someone that I won't have to second thought everything I do or say. Just for once, I want to feel like whatever I do is okay, without an ounce of worry." His rough voice brought me out of my thought process.

"What do you mean? You have to worry about what you say with people? Ryan, you must be great at hiding it."

"No Pais, its only with certain people." his head fell back on the couch, and his brown orbs where shielded by his eye lids.

"Like who?" I pressed.

"You." He mumbled unmoving.

"Is that a good or bad thing?" I asked turning to look at him.

"Wouldn't you like to know?"Ryan shot me a smirk that made me roll my eyes.

" I would actually, but your not going to tell me are you?" I asked resting my head on his shoulder.

Apon resting his head on mine, he spoke softer, "I don't know honestly."

"I wont be judgmental or anything. You can tell me anything you want."

"Even if it might over step a boundary?" He asked.

"Sure, if you want to tell me then tell me." I turned my body so I was curled into his side and pulled my fuzzy blanket over us.

"What's your biggest dream Pais?" he asked, his calloused thumb rubbing patterns on the soft skin of my shoulder

"Paris. I just want to sit out on the balcony on a rainy night with a beautiful view of the Eiffel Tower and I want the love of my life to sit with me and find the night half as special as I do." I smiled as I said this, my dream had been in place since I learned about Paris from my dad when he brought me home a Paris snow globe and told me about the beauty tat surrounded it.

"That sounds absolutely like something you'd say." He chuckled "Your dad never took you?"

I shook my head, and looked up into his gleaming eyes. "He never thought about bringing us along to out of country tours."

"That's stupid. My dad took us on a tour of each city he built in. Foreign or not." He rested his forehead on mine and for a minute I had the daring thought to imagine Ryan sitting with his arm wrapped around me, and his soft voice telling me about all his adventures compared to mine. I opened my grey eyes to meet his,

"Will you tell me about your adventures one day?"

"I'd love too. And since you want me to be honest, I'm going to say that id love to take you on one with me. Emily complains and never respects it. I bet you'd have so much fun Pais." He smiled as he spoke excitement clear in his chocolate orbs.

"And I'd be more than happy to join you whenever you go on one." I smiled back.

His hand found mine and he began to stand up, much to my protest, he gently tugged me towards the window, that lead out to the fire escape. With our movement to get up, Leonidas' paws where loud on the hard floors as he rushed to join us in the chilling fall weather. It was merely the beginning of October and I wanted to rush back inside as soon as Ryan pushed open the window and stepped out, reaching his hand out once more. I gave him a quizzical look as I accepted his hand and allowed him to position me where he pleased. Once he had me standing against the railing, a beautiful view of the city we lived in, he stood behind me, his arms wrapped around me, his chin resting on my head.

"We live in the city that never sleeps.And yet most of us take for granted the beautiful sight we are blessed with." For a while we where silent, just staring out into the swirl of lights and buildings, and I desperately wanted to know what he was thinking. Did he wish I was his Emily? Did he wish I could be his? I know I wished I was his. And that was one of the most deadly wishes I could have. No matter what we do, I cant fall for him. Because when he leaves just like everyone else, he will have the biggest impact; I won't be able to handle that.

"Come to bed Paisley, its almost two thirty and we have busy weekends I'm sure. Ill tuck you in before I head out yeah?" He pulled away and I turned around with a small smile and followed him to my room and stood still as he pulled the covers back and flicked on my lamp. He fluffed my pillows, and patted the spot where he wanted me. I crawled into the bed and got comfortable, and with that he tucked me in and planted a soft kiss to my cheek ready to leave. Not caring about the consequences that where sure to come, I grabbed his wrist as he began to leave, and with pleading eyes asked, "Stay. It's late and your tired, too tired to drive and I'd sleep better knowing you where here. I wont do anything, just close the door and lay down with me."

He seemed to internally debate it, before closing the door and making his way back over, because he was already in sweats he didn't have to take any clothes off.(Thank god, I'd never sleep if he was half naked.)

He slipped in next to me and turned on his side and looked at me with an unreadable expression. To escape the awkwardness of what I'd done, I turned my lamp off and a large smile graced my face when Ryan pulled me close to his warm body. I rested my head on his chest and his hand brought my leg to cross his muscular body. His pine scent made me nuzzle my head into his neck, and press a feather like kiss to the area before closing my eyes and drifting off.So much for not allowing myself to get my hopes up.

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Authors Note:

My deepest apologies for taking a year to update!(Literally) I hope you all have been doing well, and I hope you enjoy this chapter! The song is angels by the xx, and I hope to be updating much more frequently than a year. And no picture, but a little fluff! Hope you enjoyed this chapter!

All my love,

Han