Clato: The Cost of a Broken Heart

Chapter 45

CLOVE

"It's just for one night," Cato says, "We did promise them we would do this."

"I know, I just don't understand why I can't come with you." I'm whining and I hate it. But I don't want Cato to go, even for one night. I know we promised the rebels we would film propos for them to help ease the shift in power but I don't like anything that separates us. Ever.

"I'll be back before you know it," Cato says, kissing the top of my head. "I hate this as much as you do," he sighs against my hair. I pull him in for a kiss, warm and lingering.

"Stay safe," I tell him as he shoulders his bag and opens the door.

"You too." Cato sneaks back for another kiss then disappears behind the closing door.

-------

There's a rapping on the window like a tree beaten against it by the wind. I open my eyes into darkness, reaching for Cato before I remember he isn't here. The bed is too big without him. That's the instant I decide to ask Cato if he will move in with me. Some people would say we're moving too fast or that were just silly teenagers. Those people are wrong. They think our age defines us. What really matters is that I have survived so much to be with him. Surely we have sacrificed enough for this happy ending?

I'm just imagining Cato's face at the news when the rapping sounds again. I shiver, wishing once again that Cato were here. It's so cold. A crack of lightening illuminates the bedroom. Curtains billowing from the open door glow in the flash of light. I bolt upright in bed as a shadowy figure steps off the balcony and into my bedroom. A knife in my hand, I approach the figure.

"No need for that Clove, your father's here to take you home." Fabian coos amidst the storm.

"Stay the hell away from me or I will slit your throat." I try to calm my breathing. I can't have a panic attack right now, it will leave me vulnerable. Pretend it's the games. Pretend he's just another tribute.

"You've been an awfully bad girl, Clove. They keep you locked up well. It's taken far too long to crack the security and even then I had to wait for that insolent boy to leave." Favian hisses as he backs me into the corner. I look for a way out but there's no where to go. "I've been watching you through the security cameras for months. I watched him touch you the way only I should touch you." I lunge forward but Favian blocks my knife, sending it scattering across the room.

"Get away from me," I snap.

"Don't lie to me Clove. You want me. You want me to touch you just like that Cato boy. But unlike him I won't stop. I won't be gentle."

Favian shoves me against the wall as I kick and scream. "Stop!" I shriek as he rakes his hands down my chest. No. Not again. I knee him in the groin and Favian's face crumples. He starts to collapse and manages to pin me beneath him. "Cato," I scream before I remember he isn't here to save me. Favian makes disgusting moans as he gropes me, slobbering against my neck. I struggle but he is too heavy to shove off.

Favian rips at my clothes, reminding me of a time from before. Suddenly it is as if everything that has happened in the last year was a dream. The nightmare never ended. I am still that helpless child.

NO. Never again.

With all my strength I force Favian off of me, scrambling across the floor. The carpet is wet from the rain pouring through the open doors. I slide along the floor, carpet ripping at my knees. My hands search anxiously for the knife. A stab of pain rings through me as my palm finds the blade. Favian lurches towards me, his shirt open and whipped about by the wind.

CRACK

Another bolt of lightening shakes the sky. "I am not yours to take. I have never belonged to you! You are not my father!" I lunge at Favian, driving the knife deep into his shoulder. Favian grunts in pain before ripping out the bloody knife. He throws it to the floor, shouting, "Just you wait Clove. I will never stop until you are mine." Then he disappears down the stairwell, clutching his bleeding shoulder.

I collapse to the floor, not even bothering to close the doors. Rain pounds down around me. I shiver but don't move except to snatch up the blade. I curl up in the ground, one eye on the bedroom door, the other on the balcony, the knife clutched to my chest. I don't move for the entirety of the night.

A/N PLEASE READ
There is something I've been meaning to say to you all for a while. Over the course of this story, and its prequel, Clove has dealt with a lot of mature issues, anxiety, and depression. She has been suicidal. Through her I hope that each of you sees both the awful truth behind living with these illnesses and in these situations. I hope you also take away that these problems do not define her. Clove is a strong, wonderful person and I have fallen in love with writing her. If ANY of you have struggled with these problems yourself or just need a person to talk to PLEASE PLEASE talk to me. All of you, whether you have read my book, commented, know me--or not--are entirely welcome to comment, message me, or post on my board. I love you all and I would hate for anyone to go through life alone.

On another note I want to thank everyone who has kept up with this story as it was written and all the new people I see voting and commenting as they find it. It has meant so much to me and I am sad to say there are only a few chapters left. Don't worry--there's still plenty left and I will be writing an author's note. I do want to ask you all if anyone is interested in a possible epilogue? No promises, but your input will count!