Looping, oh the fun! (Naruto)

Ch9 Thanks to Harry Potter

Sasuke was rewarded with a flying hug when he opened the door. Clutching onto him like a koala was none other than Uzumaki Naruto.

"Geroff me, Naruto!"

"Sasuke~~~ Help me! He found out!" Big fat tears rolled down Naruto's cheeks, soaking up Sasuke's shirt.

"Who, when, what, where, how?" Five words, fired like bullets.

"Ibiki, a while ago, you know what, T&I department, I DON'T KNOW HOW WAHHHH!"

Sasuke sighed. This was the kind of things you have to deal with if you're stuck with Uzumaki Naruto for hundreds of loops. And even after so long, he's still a huge pain in the ass.

"Eat a cup of ramen and calm down."

Immediately, the huge weight on his chest was gone. In less than a second, loud slurping sound was heard coming from the kitchen.

"So, now that you've calmed down...hopefully, tell me what had happened."

Letting out a loud burping sound, Naruto set the cup onto the table, and began telling what he had experienced.

"Wait!" Sasuke interrupted. "Fake memories? How do you do that?"

Naruto stared at him as if he had grown a second head. "You're seriously asking me this? Magic, brooms, snake, long stick, owls? Ring any bells?"

"You don't mean-" Sasuke widened his eyes, and chuckled. "I should've known. You used Occlumency right (1)."

It wasn't a question; it was a statement. Because Sasuke was 99.99 percent sure it was the right answer.

"And a False Memory Charm. It worked like a charm!" Naruto exclaimed. "All I did was use Occlumency to hide my real memories, then use the False Memory Charm to plant these false memories in my head, which I can erase whenever I want."

"You gotta thank Snape for that." Sasuke smirked, remembering the 'good' times.

"No way in hell!" Naruto gagged. "He's the worst teacher ever! It was Hermione who taught me it! Successfully!"

"Hermione? She knows Occlumency?"

"Yeah, in some loops."

"And how many loops did it take you to learn Occlumency?"

"..." Naruto said something like 'mimble wimble.'

"Sorry, I can't hear you."

Naruto glared heatedly at the smirk on Sasuke's face. "About...thirty-six loops..."

"Genius," Sasuke gave him a huge thumb-up. "You're a genius, Naruto."

Anyone with a brain could hear the sarcasm literally dripping in his voice.

And unlike how most people believed, Uzumaki Naruto does have a brain.

"Did you just call me an idiot!?"

"When did I say that?" Innocent big eyes were blinking.

"...you look creepy."

Sasuke's shoulder sagged.

"Whatever, continue your story please."

"Oh well, and so..."

Thirty minutes later, with many exaggeration and wild hand gestures, Naruto finally finished his story.

"So basically, you lured them into reading your mind so you can prove your innocence, but Ibiki saw through your plan." Sasuke rolled his eyes. "You could've said that in three sentences, not including the exaggerations."

"Why aren't you worried!? They found out! Do you remember what happened last time we were found out? We were placed into a cell with chakra-suppression seals attached onto us!"

"Which we escaped using Apparition (2) seconds later and restarted the loop."

"And last last time we were captured and attached onto those cold surgery tables to be experimented on!"

"Which we, yet again, escaped using Apparition seconds later and restarted the loop."

"And last last last-"

"Did Ibiki see you using the False Memory Charm?" Sasuke interrupted.

Naruto blinked. "Of course not."

"Did Ibiki see you using Occlumency?"

Naruto frowned. "You don't use Occlumency. Once you've learned it, it's always in you, protecting your mind. It's just like learning to walk. You don't use it; it's in you once you've learned it."

"So did Ibiki have any evidence to prove you guilty?"

"No..."

"There you go. So what're you so worried about?"

Now that Sasuke has said that...the situation doesn't seemed that bad...

Naruto nodded slowly. "Yeah, what am I so worried about? If they found out, we can just use Apparition and escape. Or we can just pull the trigger (!) and start our new loop."

Seeing Naruto had finally gotten a hold of himself, Sasuke smiled.

"Anyway, I have something important I need to show you."

(1) Occlumency: It's from Harry Potter. Snape had tried to teach Harry Occlumency to block Voldemort from his mind, but it didn't work. I mean, of course, since Snape is the worst teacher ever.

(2) Apparition: Also from Harry Potter. It basically means teleporting, which doesn't require chakra, cuz it doesn't come from the Naruto universe.

(!) Trigger: To start a new loop, something must triggers it. Death is the most common trigger for looping fics.